*1 Month Later*
Your POV
I tried to act as normal as possible, smiling through my teeth as I taught the little 6 and 7 year olds that were sitting in front of me. I quickly stole a glance at the clock and saw I didn't have too much longer till recess. I was dying for some coffee, aspirin, and something greasy from the cafeteria here. I know it wasn't the most professional thing to come to work with a hangover but I couldn't exactly call out sick since I was already on probation for my new teachers aid job. I had gotten this as part of getting my degree, I only had to do this for six months until I graduated and got my credentials. As for my hangover, well I blame that mostly on me and Sophia. Ever since my ugly break up with Harry nothing has been the same. I moved in with Serena but I was close to getting my ass kicked out because I would go out with Perrie and Sophia to get belligerently drunk. I would have like to think I could be the strong woman I am and say I walked out of there that day, soldering on without a second thought but I'd be lying. The truth was I had spent three weeks in bed crying until Perrie dragged me out of Serena's apartment and to a club. Since then I had been drinking my life away, let's just say that it's been causing a lot of problems for me. I jumped hearing the bell for recess.
"Alright class head on out to the playground, when we get back we'll work on some phonics ok", I waved to my students and they rushed out. Waving to the little girls that have become attached to me.
"You're a natural", Serena smiled at me as she leant up against my class door.
"If there is a greasy breakfast sandwich, coffee, and aspirin in that bag you're holding I'll love you forever", I sat at my desk and rubbed my temples.
"I told you not to go out last night, but you're starting a new trend where you're not listening to me I guess", she chuckled playfully as she set down a brown bag and a cup of coffee on my desk.
"He haunts me I swear, I can't stay home because my mind wonders to him and then I start to cry. Next comes the pain in my chest and I just can't Serena , I just can't", I broke down as I buried My eyes in my palms and began to cry silently.
"You can't do this to yourself Y/n. Look around you, you're doing something with your life. Don't allow him to ruin that for you all because he couldn't keep his dick in his pants. You deserve to be happy", Serena placed her hand on my shoulder.
"I know I do, but I want to be happy with him. Believe it or not I'm still in love with him, I fucking love him so much it's causing me physical pain that I can't be with him. I'm scared", I began to sob harder.
"You need to calm down sweetie", Serena kneeled in front of me.
"Take deep breaths love, you have to be class ready in seven minutes", she reminded me that I couldn't have mascara and puffy eyes if I still had a long day ahead of me.
"What he did wasn't your fault, and of course you're still in love with him. I saw the way you two loved each other and it was something no one will ever have the privilege of experiencing. For your sake you have to try and move on, not with a guy but just making sure you're going to be ok. Just worry about you", she pulled me into a hug.
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"Whoa", the guy I dragged into the bathroom stall chuckled drunkly.
"Wanna a reward", I chuckled as well very intoxicated.
"Hmm what did you have in mind", he growled and nipped at my neck.
I didn't say anything as I dropped to my knees and immediately popped the button of his jeans and in one quick motion I pulled out his semi hard dick. Wasting no time I took him into my mouth and began to bob my head. I had to do something to get him out of my head, the alcohol I consumed didn't help. I could see and hear him all around the club Sophia and Perrie took me to, maybe it was the pills I popped earlier too. I didn't know, all I knew was that I could see him. His green eyes kept flashing every where I looked and I was desperately trying to do something to make me stop seeing him or maybe to help me feel something. The guy moaning above me wasn't helping as I pictured it was Harry, my mind flashed to when I was pleasing him and I stopped. I didn't say a thing as I got up from the floor and headed out of the bathroom, ignoring the guy calling after me. I just simply walked to a quiet corner of the club and called Serena crying.
"I'll be right there, don't move", she urgently replied.
I hung up and slid down the wall sobbing, I knew she was right. I had to take the steps to make myself ok, because at this rate I was going to end up killing myself. I missed him, and I know that I shouldn't have but I did. I couldn't continue to try to fill the void, maybe Serena was right. Maybe I should try to move on.
