Love and Hate ‒ ʰᶦᵗᵒˢʰᶦ ˢ.

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⚠ tw: angst, (poetic) mentions of death

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𝒯𝒪 𝐻𝒜𝒯𝐸

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JUNE 11, 20XX

DEAR HITOSHI.

Isn't it funny how I'm writing a note for you?

Maybe because out of all the people I'd want to talk to about my feelings, it'd be you. But you changed a lot and you don't know how much that pained me. Well, now you do (fucking stupid self). Anyway, I wonder how you're doing without me—without us. Are you well? Are you eating right? Are you okay? I really want to know because even if I tell you I hate you for all the mean things you did; I could never really hate you.

Will there ever be a time you'd finally talk to me again?

I hope so. I mean, if something does happen or something doesn't (and for some unknown force, you'll be able to find and read this note), I still want you to talk to me. Words are powerful, Hitoshi. For the past few months of us being friends, your words have helped me become into this confident person I am now. You are the silver lining behind those dark clouds that shroud my thoughts. You are that coffee drink from the nearby coffee shop that caffeinates me and keeps my hopes awake until the end of the day. You are the sunrise that greets my window when I wake up to prepare for school.

And even though I hate dark clouds, even though I hate having to drink coffee to stay awake, and I hate waking up before the sunrise shows up—my day will never be as complete as it is without you. And as long as you continue to notice me, even though you make fun of me, I can see it in your eyes that you care. So, I hope you continue to care for me.

Because I care a lot about you too!

I also want to tell you that whatever happens, this also isn't your fault. This isn't some sort of guilt trip for you to realize what mistakes you've made in the past—no. This is just your sign; your command that you should continue to be the caring, loving, sincere, and calm Hitoshi that I know. And when the time comes that someone else is in need of your assistance, you would always be there to rescue them. Thank you, Hitoshi.

Thank you for being my friend as well.

And oh, before I forget... I may say I hate you.

But I like you very much!

Keep caring! You'll never know who needs it!

YOURS TRULY,
LOVE