Lie To Me ✔️

5 | Lie to me

The sound of my voice was barely a whisper. I was afraid if I had spoken any louder, my heart would screech in agony. My hallowed heart already screamed in emptiness, so what more damage could you create? You took everything in me and never once thought of returning it mercifully. Instead, you stuttered, stammered. You were confused. So, I continued,

"You're free Jennie. You don't have to feel forced to be with me anymore."

I watched as disbelief entered and invaded your eyes. And, I watched those eyes suddenly look down. You took in a sharp breath. I followed your sight only to see that you were staring at the finger that no longer had the ring.

OUR ring.

My finger felt naked and cold. I had to look away and cover it's vulnerability because that's what I felt under your burning gaze, vulnerable.

You asked me where the ring was so nervously to which I replied with,

"Next to the flowers I left for you in your room."

I took in a ragged breath before smiling painfully with a stray tear rolling down my cheek,

"Happy anniversary Jennie."

And goodbye.

"I-it's what? W-wait.. oh my God! I-I'm so sorr—!"

I couldn't bare to hear anymore Jennie. Your excuses meant so little to me. So, I lifted my hand, silencing your next empty words.

"We're over."

I didn't want to say it but I knew I had to. For my sake and for my hearts sake. My heart was drowning in its own blood and it was all because of you. And it bled even more seeing tears sliding down your smooth cheek. The cheek I use to caress so gently was soaked. But, for what reason? Isn't that what you wanted? Didn't you want us to end already?

"Please leave."

I begged. I felt suffocated with you just merely standing in front of me. I wanted to tune you out, especially your soft cries that tickled my ears in the worst way possible.

But you refused to leave. You refused to give me the space I deserved. Most importantly, you refused to give my aching heart mercy. So, I grew angry.

"What more do you want Jennie?! You should be happy! You're finally going to be with the man you actually and genuinely love!" I shouted. I was aggressive with my tone yes, but your betrayal was far worse than the high volume of my voice. My voice shook and broke. I looked away, needing a different sight to grasp my attention and help me avoid your pained gaze.

Your pain radiated off of your small body. It felt so strong that it was like I could touch it and feel it kissing my fingertips. But it couldn't compare to the pain I felt as my gaze landed on my wall.

It was just an ordinary blank barrier between my room and yours. That wall was filled with pictures of my life, covering the plain color. There were so many pictures of not just my family and I, but pictures of us. We looked happy Jennie.

But, anger bubbled up and burned my chest. It was like those photos laughed and mocked me.

Our happiness mocked me.

So, I hated the sight.

That wasn't us anymore.

It was like a switch turned on inside me. One second I was seated on my bed and the next I was by my wall, hastily removing every memory of us together off of the cold white wall. Cold, just like my tears that blurred my vision. I watched my hands rip off the pictures harshly and throw it into my trash bin one by one.

It hurt. Oh God, it hurt.

You screamed and begged for me to stop, even tried holding onto my arm but I ignored you. I ignored you just like how you ignored my bleeding heart.

"Stop it!" You shouted, sobbed.

I gritted my teeth and forcefully turned around to face you, "Why? We're not together anymore."

Those words tasted bitter on my tongue. It disgusted me. And, it seemed to have pained you. Why? Why are you crying Jennie? Why are you so desperate for me to stop and talk things through with you? There's nothing left to say but Goodbye.

"Don't say that." You said. It was soft and filled with anything but happiness. So, dropping the last picture that was pinched in between my fingertips, I lifted my hand and placed it on your soaked cheek Jennie. Your cheek felt so soft and warm, just how I remembered. I don't think I'd ever forget.

I scanned your face slowly, wanting to memorize every single detail. You're so beautiful Jennie. But, now it was no longer my job to remind you every day.

"If I don't let you go. Then, how will you ever be truly happy with him?"

I needed to know that you were going to be happy. I needed to know that you were going to be taken care of. And, I needed to know you were going to be loved the same way I love you.

Your body trembled and sobs suddenly wracked your body harshly. You shook your head and leaned your cheek deeper into my palm. I could feel your tears flooding in my hand. You were hurting my love. But I was hurting more than you could ever imagine.

"No no no.." you repeated. And the volume of your voice only increased as my hand slowly slipped from your cheek. You reached forward and tried to reach for me but I stepped back and smiled softly with my tears pooling down. I exhaled,

""I know that you don't, but, if I asked you if you loved me, I hope you'd lie to me."