My Little Rebel

Chapter Eighteen: PIG

Alex's POV

I had just finished driving the two hours that it took to get from New Jersey to New York, I drove into the parking lot and found a parking space close to the building before I got out and headed upstairs to my room. I put my stuff down and then sighed and I looked around the room and then grabbed my bag and walked outside, it was dark outside but I really just wanted to be with Taylor again just for tonight before I started working on my paper that was due as of next week. I would have taken my car but his apartment was only two blocks away so I walked there instead and by the time I got there I wished I hadn't walked there because right in front of the building stood Taylor as he had a girl pinned against the wall. His lips that use to kiss mine were now hungrily kissing this other girls lips as her arms were wrapped around him, I sighed and walked over to him slowly letting the sound of my heels clicking against the pavement fill he street. This however caught his attention as he pulled away from the girl and looked over at me surprised as I shook my head.

"Maybe you should tattoo pig across your face in capital letters," I said shoving his coat into his chest as I glared at him. I shook my head and turned and walked off feeling a slight pain in my chest...yes that pain was my heart...I had promised myself that this was just sex...this was nothing but I was wrong. The sex wasn't amazing and great just because he was a rebel it was amazing and great because I liked him...I had feelings for him and now they were hurt...I was nothing to him so he was able to move on from girl to girl but for me it really hurt. He was my little rebel and now he was gone...in a way it was actually for the better because I'd have to say goodbye to him eventually anyways right...I just had hoped that it was later on like...six months from now more so then right now.

I walked back to the school and shut the door to my dorm room as I locked it behind me and then sighed as I shut my eyes for a moment just taking everything in, taking in the fact that I had been so stupid to let my heart want a rebel...to want a man that didn't have girlfriends, I was so stupid to ever think he would change just for me. I shook my head and walked into the room throwing my bag down and then falling back onto my bed as I groaned and looked up at the ceiling, I was so stupid to come back to school early just to spend some time with Taylor...I should have figured that he wasn't waiting for me...I should have figured that he was already getting on top of someone else...I should have figured he didn't feel the same way I did. 

I stayed laying on my bed for a bit before I got up and walked to my desk turning on my lap top, I changed into my shorts and t-shirt and then turned off the lights before taking a seat by my computer and opening the word document so that way I could start writing my paper. I kept my brain focused on the paper and nothing else just wanting to get it finished...then again if I finished the paper that would mean I'd be spending six more days doing nothing and trying to figure out what to do with myself. I got through about half of the paper before I stopped and re-read everything that I had written, I sighed and then saved the document before hearing a light tapping noise at my window. I slowly stood up hearing the noise again, I closed my lap top lid and then walked to the window looking out at who was there as I sighed and shook my head. 

Taylor stood there outside the window looking at me waiting for me to open the window; I shook my head and walked off into my room trying to keep myself busy as Taylor stood outside the window. 

"Can you open up please...it's really cold out here," he said and I could hear him stutter out there and I knew it wasn't because he was nervous but because he was cold. I shook my head though...I didn't want him coming in here I didn't want him to make up lies just to get in my pants I just wanted him to leave me alone, I plugged my computer in and continued to keep myself distracted as he stayed standing outside.

"P-please Alex...just for a minute s-so we can talk," he explained as I held myself back from letting him inside. I needed to be strong and keep a part of my dignity...I needed to stay as far away from him as possible. "Your really going to leave me out here in the c-cold," he said stuttering again as I ignored him. If I hadn't caught him with another girl I would have let him in by now but for my hearts sake I was leaving him outside in the cold...oh and to add on...it was now snowing. "A-Alex please...just let me in so I can explain," he said as I sighed and looked over at him as he had his arms crossed and was shivering.

"Why...go back to your apartment where your whore is," I said angrily as he looked at me. "I don't even understand why you're here...just go away and get the fucking hint that I don't want to talk to you," I said as he shook his head. "Just go away," I said pulling the blinds shut to give him the last remaining hint that I didn't want to talk to him but I knew he was still standing outside. I knew he was still standing there waiting for me to let him in; I pulled my comforter down and then looked around my room.

"I was being stupid Alex," I heard him say as I groaned. For a second just a second I thought he was gone but nope he was still out there. "The other day when I said that you c-can't get attached to me I was...well I was t-talking about myself," he said as I sat down on my computer chair and listened to him. "I got scared cause you started...you started getting into my h-head and I couldn't get you o-out," he stuttered and I could tell he was really cold by the way he was speaking. "I've never liked anyone before and it s-scared me to f-feel that way a-about you and I panicked...I-I didn't mean to hurt you Alex and I promise that it w-was only a k-kiss...I didn't do a-anything else with her...I wouldn't do that and I s-swear if you tell anyone that I said a-any of this I will h-have to hurt you," he said as I rolled my eyes and waited. "P-please let me in," he said as I finally broke. I sighed and got off my chair and slowly walked over to the window, "please Alex...just a minute and then I'll leave you alone." He said as I leaned against the wall waiting to see if he had anything else to say but at this point I was actually sad with myself that I had made him stand outside in the cold. "I'm about to lose my balls to frost bite here Alex please just let me in," he said as I laughed slightly and shook my head. I pulled the curtains back and looked at him as he stepped back slightly and looked at me shivering, I sighed and unlocked the window lifting it up. I stepped back and let him climb through before I closed the window and the blinds, "I-I I'm sorry," he stuttered before a shiver shot through his body. 

"Come on...let's get you warmed up," I suggested as he nodded and followed me as he removed his boots and his jacket that he was wearing. He crawled into bed with me and I wrapped my arms around him trying to get him to warm up but he was freezing cold which was making me shiver, "so you do have a cheesy side," I said as he glared at me.

"D-don't get use t-to it," he stuttered as I laughed and shook my head cuddling closer to him as he buried his face into my neck making me shiver from the coldness. 

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