Beyond Horizons

K is for Kissing

I am addicted to you.

That is what I told her. Because I am addicted to her, her smile, the scent of her hair, her lips touching mine. Those are the things that made me giddy, mad, mad, I am madly in love with the woman of my dreams. The woman who is out of my league. She runs my thoughts and dreams  day and night. I'm not supposed to be saying this because she is not my girlfriend. Not yet. 

She may not be my girlfriend. But she is more than that, she is like a soulmate, someone who understands me more than anyone. And we were so into each other, that we miss each other when we are apart. We kept on texting. Here is our conversation. 

Note:

Z,

Hey! I need to attend my cousin's wedding. Here's your snacks for today. Do not forget to eat your  breakfast and lunch. Enjoy class. 😘 Don't miss me too much will be back after dinner. 

xoxo,

A

I did not see her this morning. She must have left very early. We talked about it the day before, actually the night she got jealous. I know that she will be back late, so, I will be alone today. Well, I have no breakfast, lunch and dinner buddy. But, we kept in touch the whole day. Also, I update my girlfriend. I did not miss that one out because I know it will cause another fight.

Arya sent me a picture after she was done with her make up. She was stunning. I told her that, we were past the I am-shy-to-say-things-to-you part. On the other hand, my girlfriend also sent me a picture of her. I also, complimented her, she looked so cute. Damn. I felt like I had to girlfriends. 

I have one girlfriend, and another girl I am currently pinning for.  It is hard. If you have to maintain two relationships. I do not recommend. Do not ever do what I do. I feel horrible for being an asshole. 

I miss her. I miss Arya. I mumbled to myself and sighed.

I went to the library to study. Preparing for the finals which is two weeks from now. It is hard to focus when the person you want is not with you. I texted Arya again. 

We did find ways. When she came, I hugged her immediately as if I did not see her for years. She giggled at that. The hug lasted for a minute and while doing it did, I smelled her. I placed my head on the crook of her neck. 

She is so beautiful. I dragged her to one of the shower rooms. I kissed her senseless, at first hurried, with much vigor. Our lips crushed, tongues danced with each other. After a long while,  we did it with gusto like as if it was the last day on earth,  like our lives depended on it. 

We kissed each other so passionately that every single cell in me came to life. I knew, this is my person. After that, we panted, as we both laughed. A much needed break. We stared at each other. Admiration filled my eyes. We kissed again this time slower as if we are savoring each moment. Her lips touched mine and our tongues danced with one another slowly, like a slow dance. And we both know we are safe with each other. It is as if we are caressing each other with every move, promising that we will be there no matter what. This is my soulmate. And I could not let her go no matter how selfish it is to the person I should be faithful to. This is the person I have been looking for. No matter how selfish it is. This is the woman I am so in love with that I am willing to let go of my promises, break them and shatter someone else's heart. 

Despite knowing that it will be a crime and it would cost buckets of tears to the other person. I know how horrible I am. 

I'm so sorry Jen. I'm sorry for the heartbreak I am about to cause you. I know I cannot make up for everything that I will do. I wish I was different from all the other people who hurt you. I am so sorry for this.