The German

22. Accident.

Chapter 22: Accident.

_______

So this is it.
Death through an accident.
But I guess this isn't that bad, it's quite peaceful here.
Very white.
And I don't feel anything.
I don't feel any pain.
I feel free.
Like I can finally breath...

*zap*
Wait-
*zap*
What was that?
*zap*
I can see something.
*zap*

"Uhhhhhhhhh" I shot up in shock with a huge breath then fell back on to the bed.
I opened my eyes and looked around the room. Doctors and nurses surrounded me.

"Sweetheart lay back down. It's okay to go back to sleep." The nurse told me. I turned to face her with watery eyes.
I didn't even need to ask what happened. I know what happened. My wrist was tightly bandaged and I could see the blood through the dressing.
My eyes locked with the nurses. She was very calming looking, young with short brown hair and small features.

My eyes remain on hers and before I know it I've broken out into tears. She swoops In from the side and held me in her arms.

"Shhh, shhhh. It's okay. You're going to be okay. I promise. I know it seems hard but what ever it is you're going through will pass. Everything will get better but it will get worst first okay." She stroked my hair as she spoke. and somehow she new exactly what to say.
"Just lay back down and go to sleep." my eyes eased up as she laid me back onto the bed. My eyes naturally closed and I slid into sleep.

_____
I could feel myself drifting awake and tightened my grip on what ever is in my hand, to find another hand.
I opened my eyes and looked at who was with me in my room and it's Robbie?

"I'm sorry." He said
I just ignored him and looked away not letting go of his hand.
"I'm sorry for not being there for you. I'm sorry for ignoring you. I'm sorry for hurting you the way I did and I'm sorry for not being a good brother like I should of been." My eyes couldn't help but dart back to where he was. He had tears in his eyes and his shoulders were tensed. It looked like he hasn't slept for days.

His eyes met mine and I could feel tears threatening me.

"I promise I'm going to change-" he continues. "I'm going to stop drinking and I'm going to be the man of the house for once. Especially since dad is leaving. I promise, I'll be here for you from now on. I won't let this happen again. You can talk to me from now on, if you need anything, I'll be here." He forced a weak smile but I can tell he is hurting.

"Can I ask why you did it?"

"I didn't mean to." I immediately spat out.
"I just needed some relief and had an accident."

"Why? Why have you been gone?"

"You should know why!" I snapped and his eyes dropped.

"Why'd you cut again?"

"Because I did okay."

"Please, you can talk-"

"Oh look who's up!" A nurse came in with a cheerful smile.
"We will bring in some food in a minute and some water you're gonna need it. You've lost a lot of blood sweetheart."

"Okay."

She smiled then left the room.

"How did I get here anyway?"

"I heard you in your room and was coming up to apologise for hurting you but when I got there it was really quiet. I opened the door and you were covered in blood so I bought you here."

"Thank you." I said and Robbie jumped from his seat and wrapped me up in his arms.

"Oh and I called Jake and the boys, they are coming to visit you later."

A smile spread across my lips.

"How'd you know that would cheer me up."

"I'm still your brother. I know these things."

____

"Julia!" The three boys shouted as they ran into my hospital room. They all jumped onto my bed giving me their famous group hugs.

"Immmmf huh moopphttttllll". Is all I could manage to say.

"What?" They all said in sync.
I pushed them off so I could talk.

"I'm still in a hospital here guys. Calm it a little."

"Oh sorry." they all said.

"We saw Sylvia before." Ethan said as they took a seat on the couch.

"Oh yeah? How is she?" The last time I saw here she was still in her coma. I just pray she wakes up.

"Well she's awake. And has no memory loss except for what happen that night. She is going to make a full recovery." My eyes light up. Thank god for that.
"We told her you were here."

"WHAT! WHY?" I snapped and they all backed up.

"Well she asked where you were and how you were doing so we told her."

"She doesn't need that stress right now."

"Calm down sassy bitch. It's fine, she knows you're strong and says you'll be fine. she still wants to see you but the nurse has said she must stay in bed for another few days."

_____

"Thank god you're okay my baby. I was so worried." my mum ran up to me and wrapped me in her arms as Robby and I got out of the car.

"Oh really? Then where were you the last 4 days I've been in hospital?" I snapped and pulled out of her grasp and stormed to my room slamming the door behind me.

I heard my mothers sobs from down the hallway but they didn't bother me as I turned on bring me the horizon, onto my radio.

I plopped myself down on my bed and watched my dream catcher float in circles from the breeze of my open window.

Robbie came in after me.
I know exactly what he is gonna say.
He is gonna tell me I shouldn't be so harsh on mum because she does love me, blah blah blah.

"So what's death like?"

"What?" I sat up as He surprised me with his question.

"You were legally dead for 3 minutes. so what was death like?"

I raised my eye brow at him but just fell back onto my bed.

"Well it was peaceful. Quiet. and white. Like really white. Brightly white."

"Cool." He replied as he threw himself next to me on the bed.

"Ava had a dream catcher like that."

"Yeah I know. Remember I bought it for her on her 12th birthday."

"Huh. I forgot." he chuckled.

"She would have been 15 this year."

"Yeah she would have. Hey did you know she was in to ghosty things?"

I narrowed my eyebrows. "No?"

"Well I was going through her old room and in the closet was a ouigie board."

"What?"

"It was really pretty too. had a gorgeous portrait of a wolf on it, painted in blues an greys. Also it was the only board I've seen that has good bye on it. Because if you don't say goodbye then the ghost you're communicating can pass into the living world through a person. I think."

"Whoa shit."

"She also had a few voodoo dolls."

"Oh yeah I gave her those. They were mine when I was 14 and I decided to give them to her. I also gave her my favourite skull statues."

"Don't tell me you gave her the ouigie board too." He said.

"Well..."

"Julia! You're such a dark freak." he joked and pushed me a little.

"Robbie? Come with me to Ava's room. And bring out the ouigie board?"

"Why?"

"I have a stupid idea."