I Love You

14

Xiao Zhan woke up with a headache. All he remembered was chugging the alcohol after his mind spoke nonsense.

Xiao Zhan groaned and opened his eyes as he found himself in a warm embrace, against a well built body with a sandalwood scent.

Xiao Zhan stared at the neck in front of him, silently observing at least one part of the man's body and enjoying the embrace before having to leave.

Xiao Zhan was so tempted to place a kiss on the neck but he forced himself not to. Looking up, he got the shock of his life when he saw Yibo staring at him lovingly.

"Morning, Zhan Zhan" Yibo smiled and Xiao Zhan blushed, immediately pushing Yibo away while thanking the heavens he did not kiss Yibo's neck.

Xiao Zhan groaned as the headache came back. Yibo got up and went to his bag, grabbing a bottle of water and painkillers.

"Y-You... W-Why do you have painkillers..." Xiao Zhan stuttered and Yibo smirked "Xiao Laoshi, why do you think I have it? Is your back not sore from last night?"

Xiao Zhan's eyes widened as he immediately checked his back but relaxed when he realised Yibo was joking "Wang Yibo!"

Yibo laughed and sat beside Xiao Zhan. "So Xiao Laoshi has thoughts of doing such things with me. I thought Xiao Laoshi would immediately defend himself by saying he would never do such a thing with me"

Xiao Zhan only looked away as he drank the painkiller. Yibo smiled. He gave Xiao Zhan a kiss on his cheek and before Xiao Zhan could react, Yibo got up to get ready.

Xiao Zhan sat there with his eyes shut, trying to ignore the headache while telling himself to calm down and his heart to stop jumping so quickly.

Once the camp ended, Xiao Zhan avoided Yibo and headed home. He sat on the sofa, hugging his legs while biting his nails. The television was on but he wasn't watching it.

Darren came back and saw Xiao Zhan in a daze. Xiao Zhan did not hear Darren despite Darren calling him many times. Finally, Xiao Zhan only responded when Darren shook him.

"Darren... Yibo explained himself..." Xiao Zhan started. Darren smiled "What did he say?"

"H-He... It was a misunderstanding... He was acting with the girl to make me jealous and the kiss we saw outside his house was staged by his father..."

"And how do you feel?" Darren asked. Xiao Zhan glanced at him and gulped. Is he supposed to tell Darren his hearts beat as wildly as it did the first time he saw Yibo?

Or is he supposed to tell Darren about how nervous he gets when Yibo is near or how he can stare at him the whole day.

Darren seeing Xiao Zhan enter a daze again, cupped his cheeks and kissed him. In shock, Xiao Zhan shoved Darren away.

"D-Darren... I..." Xiao Zhan stuttered, shocked at what he did. Darren smiled "Zhan, there is your answer"

"I..." Xiao Zhan hesitated but Darren stopped him "Zhan, I've said this before and I'll say it again. If you ever think that you love Yibo more, then you should be with him"

"W-What if I'm only feeling guilty towards him because I misunderstood him?" Xiao Zhan asked and Darren chuckled "Zhan, that's a bad excuse. We both know very well you love him"

"But..." Xiao Zhan started but Darren stopped him. "Zhan, I don't want you to feel bad for me. I know you love me but it will never be as much as Yibo. I'm just glad you gave me a chance after more than 3 years"

"Darren... I do love you..." Xiao Zhan said and Darren smiled "I know. You wouldn't kiss me if you didn't love me. But I know if you had a choice, you would choose Yibo"

"I... I'm sorry..." Xiao Zhan cried. He felt bad to both Yibo and Darren. He wished somehow there wasn't those misunderstandings. And he knew how bad it felt to be given hope then destroyed.

"Hey, Zhan, I can read what you are thinking" Darren chuckled "I don't want you to pity me. Look, I was always prepared to lose you, because you loved Yibo from the start. But you were different. Yibo was your whole world and he destroyed it. I won't be as sad and hurt as you were, okay?"

Xiao Zhan cried harder "Why are you... so nice... You should have... left me long ago..."

Darren hugged him "I will never leave you alone. If ever Yibo mistreats you, you can come complain to me"

Darren stroked Xiao Zhan's hair "As a breakup present, would you let me sleep tonight hugging you once more?"

"Of course" Xiao Zhan said as he hugged Darren. Darren was so much to him. When he needed comfort, warmth and love, Darren gave it all to him.

But Yibo was more. Yibo was his first love, his first friend, his first home. Xiao Zhan was alone and had to work to survive and Yibo was the reason he didn't give up.

Somehow, Xiao Zhan's heart just chooses Yibo. He was never able to get over Yibo. Darren was also never able to take over Yibo's space in his heart.

The next day, Xiao Zhan woke up alone. He came out and saw breakfast already prepared. He sat down, not knowing if he should feel awkward.

Darren put down the two glasses of milk and ruffled Xiao Zhan's hair "Morning, Zhan Zhan" Xiao Zhan smiled "Morning"

"Should I fetch you today and go for dinner outside?" Darren asked and Xiao Zhan nodded with a smile. He was grateful Darren wasn't being awkward with him.

Before they left the house, Xiao Zhan stopped him "Darren... thank you" Darren paused then returned a smile and ruffled Xiao Zhan's head.