Sinister [Jason McCann]

Thirty-Five

Jason’s POV --

 

With the car still parked in the driveway, I sat in the driver’s seat staring at the nothing and everything.

 

Two more days flew by and it seems like Lea wasn’t having as much of a hard time resisting as I appeared to be. I told myself, over a hundred times at the most, that she’d be the first to cave. She would be the one to show up and maybe not apologize but express the obvious intention of wanting too. I resent myself for being so weak, spending a good portion of my days thinking about a girl, when I knew the power I held over most of the women I’ve ever surrounded myself with made me superior. I could very well forget about all this and live as though nothing ever happened.

 

Sadly, I knew myself all too well and eventually I would go insane from the impatience. I would grow tired of pretending and acting like the last couple of months haven’t impacted my life in some way, even if it were just a slight impact.

 

The engine was running and my mind was a mass clutter of two split thoughts. Half of me knew where Lea befell at this very moment and I was aware that I could easily see her within the next few hours. It was Monday so I expect Lea to be in school, unless she stayed home for whatever reason. However, the other half is where my pride resided and my ego was convincing me to do the opposite of what I wanted. My thoughts were at war, debating on whether or not it’d be idealistic for me to go see Lea. It probably wouldn’t be the best idea but I was running out of good ones as the minutes went by.

 

The nerves in my hand have worsened, shaking a bit more than normal. I was beginning to irritate myself now that I couldn’t come to a quick decision. Either I reverse out of this fucking driveway or I pull the keys out and head inside to smoke a joint or two. For any other girl, this wouldn’t even be debate and my joint would be ready to smoke just as quickly as this sentence will come to an end. I now wished that Lea were just another girl and I wished that I wasn’t so hung up--still buying her gifts, knowing she’s not around and just waiting for a chance to hand them all to her so she’d see that I do care.

 

I press my foot against the gas lightly, letting the engine vibrate the seats enough to somehow calm my anxiety and clear my head. With a long, exhilarating sigh, I set the car into reverse and pull out of the driveway recklessly. A cigarette sounded just about right at this time.

 

Lea’s POV --

 

I lean against the wall, tapping the back of my shoe on the floor. Class was in session, about fifteen or so minutes left and I spent the entire period in the bathroom. No, to be precise, I spent majority of the school hours in here. The only class I remember stepping foot into was first period and that was merely to prove whether I showed up or not. After that class I either sat in the bathroom or snuck into the library to take a nap up until lunch and afterwards I returned to the bathroom.

 

A lot of my time is been spent staring at the walls, my shoes or my hands. Often times, I’d play with my hair by twirling my finger around it tightly and then releasing so it’d spiral out of control. If I grew bored of that, I’d look through my phone and look up photos of my favorite celebrities, gawking over how gorgeous Demi Lovato is to how sexy Justin Timberlake is. I considered texting Lana but I knew she’d be working or busy at this time so that wasn’t an option. I’d text Kira to join me for these last couple of minutes but since I’ve been avoiding all my classes I wasn’t even sure if she showed up. Not only that but it’d be--not only random--but absurd for me to text her.