Sinister [Jason McCann]

Thirty-Two

Lea’s POV --

 

If I eliminate the amount of homework and school work I’ve been going through, I guess it’d be safe to say that these past four weeks have been amazing.

 

Ever since the situation with Sandrine, I’ve gained the respect of many which balanced with the amount of cold shoulders I received simultaneously. I was still, very much, considered a loner but it didn’t affect me. Within school, I found my own way of replenishing my happiness.

 

Kira and I have yet to reunite. I began to comprehend that there was absolutely no way of winning her back. As much as I tried to act as though it didn’t affect me, I couldn’t put up the front forever. She was my only friend and the only person who could thoroughly convince to me to stop all thoughts of suicide. For a long time, she was my only sanity but now I’ve been replaced with a girl who’s nothing but a slut.

 

My tongue painted the infinity symbol against my cheek as I continued sinking into my thoughts. A pencil in my hand drew hearts surrounding Jason’s name and underneath it all were two stick figures which I could proudly call myself the illustrator of.

 

It absolutely boggles my mind; knowing Ace was stupid enough to cheat on Lana. In my complete and utterly biased opinion, how could anyone cheat on Lana and not feel some sort of disgust afterwards. I mean, honestly, have you seen Lana? I’d love to ask Ace that personally but for now I held no intention of even speaking to him, until he and Lana were on well spoken terms.

 

Moving along, I’ve spent more time with Jason these past few weeks. I’d say everyday at the most. I’ve risen to the point where I simply couldn’t take school seriously for an entire week and for that week I would cut classes to talk to Jason or skip school and meet up with him altogether. He always made me feel better, not in a sexual way--although I hoped to be satisfied in that manner eventually--but in an intellectual way of course. Everytime I saw him, he’d surprise me with a new and expensive, gift that he bought minutes prior to seeing me. We’d go places, far from where we both resided and spend an hour or two just talking and laughing at the stupidest shit.

 

He’d often ask if I’d like to go home and my answer would remain the same as always: No.

 

Why would I go home when I could remain in a sanctuary that allowed me to rest my head against the chest of someone so dear to me? In all actuality, I managed to dissect the concept of the word ‘home’ and give it a meaning which applied to me. Home isn’t an actual building or place where you’ve spent your childhood or place to run too when there’s nowhere to turn. Home can be a person, an animal if you so wished it to be. I’d never say this out loud, to save myself from the embarrassment but I knew, very well, that Jason was a home to me.

 

Today would be the first time, in a few weeks, that I’ve stayed in school for the full seven hours. No cutting, no tardiness, and all my work (aside from Chemistry) has been turned in on time. As of right now, the final bell has rung and I was busy gathering my things to head home. I no longer lived with Lana, I was back with my parents and they’ve been at each other’s neck for so long they haven’t even focused on the fact that my grades were dropping. I dreaded the thought of returning home but at least I’d have some solitude in my room.