It has been months since L died. I just can't really imagine I've survived this school year. In a few weeks, it'll be her 1st death anniversary, it's the only gathering I don't wanna be at.
It was a hot afternoon. I am at the bench near the volleyball court watching the varsities. I just wish I can be one of them. Hays, I really wanna learn how to play it that way.
My thoughts flew somewhere else until,
"Miss Delfin? Come to my office now."
It was the Directress of the Student Affairs. What did I've done wrong this time?
"We both know your standing for the BSA Program right?"
"Yes, Miss."
"You're an intelligent student, Miss Delfin. But what happened? We agreed that you will work harder this time on order to be retained in the program."
"Yes, Miss. I did my best. I really do. Why? Did I failed again now?"
"Sad to say, but yes. It's your last time as we agreed last semester."
"Miss, but... You know, uhm. I can't lose this course. I've worked hard for this," I can't help but cry.
This course was the reason for my studying till late night. The reason why I have been exhausted and let L go alone the night she was caught in the accident. The reason why she was now gone.
"I'm sorry but it was already decided by the Dean. We will allow you to still take up the Management Accounting. It is still similar with BSA, but it will not have all the subjects."
That's all. That's it. It's done. I will not be able to take BSA anymore in this institution. But I don't wanna transfer anymore. It'll cost more. I just have to face the consequence of my actions.
It's June 1st. The date I've hated the most. We are gathered here in the garden where L's urn is.
"How's your studies?" it was AJ asking.
"I failed. The course that I've been dreaming, is gone." I sipped my drink and felt the hot sensation it brings.
"It's okay," he patted my head. "You can still take that up in other university."
"But I don't wanna transfer. It was my dream school. Maybe that course isn't for me now. Maybe, I have to take other first then that."
"Everything happens for a reason," we both laughed when we accidentally said those phrase.
"I kept that in my mind since the first time you used it as a reason," I laughed at him, "Why? It's true. That was really a justifying reason for everything," he finished it with an annoyed expression.
"Did I interrupt something here?" K asked.
"Of course not. We were just having a good time here," AJ answered.
"So, can I join?" he poured drink on our glasses.
"Yeah, sure," I smiled at him.
We spent the night drowning ourselves at the drinks. Mom and Dad allowed me to do whatever I want. They just told me to know my limitations.
The next semester just passed like my first year. I still didn't made it. I didn't survived the Management Accounting Program. I have no other choice but to shift again to BSBA Major in Financial Management course.
"Hi, I heard you're a shiftee," I didn't look at her. "I'm a shiftee too, from the BSA Program," I finally looked at her. "Can we sit beside you? We don't know anyone here, eh," she blushed. Maybe because of shyness.
