Ego|jhs

Chapter 17

When you are doing something you really love,time flies by really fast.

I didn't believe it before but now I do.It has officially been one year and a half since I started playing piano again.More than two years since I met Hoseok.I still can't believe how fast time flew by.

A lot has changed in these two years.A lot.

I was suicidal,depressed,at the rock bottom of my life.But now I'm happy.I can happily play piano.Whenever I touch piano when I'm alone,I'm faced with the memories of my mother and the painful memories of past.Sometimes I tried to give up again because the flashbacks were becoming intolerable.But I held on and continued to play.That was my battle and I think I've overcome it.It was hard,but I did it.I fought my demons.

And I think I'm starting to love myself.I'm conscious about myself and do what is good for me.Before this I used to hate myself which is horrible.But now I don't.I have discovered about my ego successfully.I learned no matter what having a little bit of ego is important.I am not inferior to anybody.

Definite answer to the truth of this world is only one and unchanging me.

Now I trust myself and follow the path I want.Whatever my way is the only right way for me.

Before I thought my life would be full of regret and no hope,till I die.But now I don't think so.I see hope and I don't regret any choice I made.

One of the very first things Hoseok told me was the only thing that I needed was a little hope and some self love.

And he was right.

I smiled as my hope came and sat by me on the bench I was sitting on.We were currently in the university ground sitting on a bench at the very corner.He came and handed me the rainbow sorbet he brought.It's really hot,so I told him to bring one.I smiled seeing the sorbet.It has so many memories attached to it.I bit the ice cream and started thinking.

BTS and Hoseok came really far this year as well.And I really fell for them and the the message BTS conveys.

"Love yourself"

They give hope to everyone and they teach people what is actually important by their music.I respect them for that.And recently they've released their MAP OF SOUL:7 album.It's such a beautiful album.Every song is nice.And as comeback trailer Hoseok released a song named 'Ego'.He wrote it himself and the song gives hope to so many people.Hoseok wants to give so many people hope,make them love themselves,teach them the importance of it.He wants to save so many people like he saved me.I'm sure BTS's songs and Hoseok did manage to save a lot of people from the worst thing named 'depression'.My hope became so many people's hope by the song 'Ego'.I hope the meaning of the song reaches out to many many people.

The map of your soul is the most important map.That's the map of all.Everyone should follow the map and the way they want.It will lead them to the place they want.That's your ego.I hope many people get this message.

"What were you looking at?"Hoseok asked and leaned over on my phone.

I stopped thinking immediately and turned my phone off.Why did I keep it on?

"Nothing!"I replied.

Hoseok narrowed his eyes while eating his ice cream,"I already saw it,Eunji.It's about that piano competition being hosted on the 24th April,right?I saw you looking at the advertisement yesterday too.Why don't you apply?"

"Nononono,Hoseok.I don't want to apply.I was looking at it.My skills aren't that good."

"Bullshit,your skills are amazing.So try it.I know you want to try."