Falling into sick

Exposed

I walked out of the bathroom silently. Darry was in his recliner, Soda was on the couch with Steve, and Two-bit was sitting on the floor. The tv was on and I'm guessing they were waiting like that for a while. Darry's eyes immediately fell on me. I couldn't read them. Soda had his head in his hands, and Steve was sitting right beside him, a sad look on his face and Twobit was distracted by the tv as always. I pulled the sleeve of my sweater carefully over the wrap on my arm. Darry was the only one who knew I was there and he watched me try to hide it. My eyes danced around the room. I didn't want to meet anyone's eyes and I didn't want to start crying in front of the gang. I took a deep breath and looked at Darry. His eyes were staring at my left sleeve even though my arm was no longer visible. I self cautiously moved my arm behind me. Darry's gaze shifted to meet my eyes. I flinched. I'm so scared and nervous. I can't tell how anyone is going to react right now. The door to my room is right down the hall. I tried to sneak away but I only got 3 steps in before Darry called my name.

"Ya Dar?" I can feel their eyes looking at me but I didn't turn around. I just stared ahead to my doorway, my mind was thinking, make it to the doorway and everything will be back to normal.

"Come here." I knew the only thing that could make this situation worse was me not obeying him, but that's what I did. I walked to my room, put my hand on the doorknob. "Ponyboy Michael Curtis! Get in this living room now!" I shuffled into the doorway of the living room and leaned against the frame on the opposite side of the room from Darry. "Why?" It was a simple question, but there was no simple answer. I shrugged. "That's your answer for why Soda just found you on the floor trying to slit your wrists!" I nodded my head.

"When did you start?" Soda asked. "There were cuts before you held the razor over your vain, have you done that before? Pony! Tell me!" He wasn't looking at anything. Just at the wall in front of him. Tears started to fall out of my eyes and I sank against the door frame until I was wrapping my arm around my legs and cradling the one I cut.

"I'm sorry," I whimpered.

"It's okay pone." Soda whispered from beside me now. "You felt like that was the only way to help yourself. Now I need you to promise us something." He tapped my shoulder and I looked up. "I need you to promise that, next time you feel like you did then, I need you to come talk to me, or Darry, or Two-bit or even Steve. We all agreed to help you out, okay?" I nodded my head and wrapped myself into a human ball again.

  

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