For When You're A Man (under reconstruction)

Trolleys and Triangles

I needed a distraction. So I did something I promised I wouldn't do. The rational part of my brain said, Noah if you're trying to set your friend up with a guy - you should promptly stop going on dates with him and catching deeper feelings for him.

Just as I was getting dressed, I got an incoming 3-way call from Jason and Lottie - the only two people I know who do those.

"We're at Jason's right now, I feel like going shopping with you two, we haven't hung out properly in ages!" Lottie said, chirpier than usual.

They both helped me feel normal again after my Dad passed and I've been so preoccupied with life that I haven't chilled with them much - so it's only fair. Even if I was really looking forward to getting to know Seb a little better.

"Also, Seb said you two are great friends now so I invited him over!" Jason added.

Does anyone want two gently used friends? The shipping is free.

"I'll be over in around 45 minutes," I said, hanging up.

***

Seb was the first to wrap his arms around me. So now we're stuck playing the bromance game, I guess. Great. On the bright side - he's a good hugger.

"I've missed you so much!" Lottie tiptoed to pinch my cheeks. She rummaged around in her backpack to get her phone and texted me the newly annotated script.

Rule number one of hanging out with Lottie and Seb at the same time, never leave them alone together again. She was explaining the concept of the play to him and he was being charismatic Seb talking about how she was the best actor in the school and how much he loved her passion. Note to self, do not befriend people that are more attractive than you and better than you in every way or else your crush will be with them instead. Especially when it's more socially acceptable for them to do so. What right do I have to be angry anyway? We aren't really anything.

I was interrupted from my stream of thought when Jason said "I really want to know how you two became friends,"

Jason, I love you. But I'm this close to shipping you off to Jupiter with no space suit or any sources of food.

"We sit next to each other in Economics," I said, which was true. For someone who enjoys the stage, I am a rotten liar. My forehead gets sweaty, the words would crash together and if I ever get caught, I break out into tears. But lies by omission - are my forte.

"Yeah, we didn't like each other at first at all, but then we started to like each other ... a lot," Seb finished my sentence.

I need new people in my life. Is he seriously trying to flirt with me, now? He knows how obviously it shows on my face when I'm embarrassed. Did he just say he likes me? I can't deal with this mess. 

"You never told me you guys were close," Lottie added.

Oh fuck. I know what comes next. I get dragged in a corner and help devise a 50 step plan to get Seb and Lottie to date that comes complete with outfit help and what to text him. How the hell am I still a walking gay best friend stereotype when I'm trying to appear straight? Is there a big flashing sign over my head or something? 

"I want to go to that new sports shop, I really want to get into rollerblading," Lottie said, dusting her self off and we all set off.

I stayed with Jason and let Lottie and Seb go off together as they talked about roller blades, piercings and records and whatever else it is that cool rich people talk about.

I was determined to take my mind off of it. Jason and I raided the Jump! he paid but made me give him a piggyback ride for 30 minutes as an exchange. That was fine by me. After getting some snacks, we found an abandoned trolley. You know exactly what comes next. We rode around in it, each taking turns to be the one riding vs being the pusher. Until we got to a Lidl and practically bought out the entire bakery section.

"I love hanging out with you," Jason laughed breathlessly

"Me too," I agreed

"But we never talk about anything serious," he continued

Jason, why? You have completely and utterly ruined the moment.

"I am so glad to see you happy, Noah." He said, patting my head.

"I'm going to tell you a secret. I want to be someone that people can come to if they need something. Not just someone they come to because they want to have fun," He said.

Jason was the first person to make me feel welcome when everyone else turned their noses up at me when I came here. I can't lie, when he said he played water-polo, I automatically wrote him off as an utter twat but he was really cool. He also made me break my rule against ever befriending someone with a man-bun. Then he introduced me to Lott. The least I can do is open up to him.

"I'm gay," I said, looking him dead in the eyes. The first time I had ever dared to say the words out loud. And the first person I choose is my straight, male best friend. The one I just finished wrestling.

"Thanks for telling me. I know it must have been hard," he replied. That was it? It was sort of anticlimactic - in the best way. Weirdly, I trusted him a little more now.

"I've never told anyone that before," I admitted.

"So, do you like anyone?" he asked me out of curiosity.

Stop prying Jason!

"You have exceeded your amount of secrets. They will restock this time next month. To buy more secrets, press 1." I concluded, yawning.

Then I started my manga.