Blink Of An Eye

Chapter 3

My mom and dad got a hotel room, but I spent the night at the hospital. As if I would even consider leaving. He was the love of my life. My soulmate. My person. As expected, I got no sleep. The small ICU room was furnished with two hard, plastic type chairs. If I even managed to get comfortable and thought of relaxing my tense body, one of the machines would beep, startling me out of even attempting that possibility.

I knew I needed to lay off of the coffee, it really wasn't good for me, but it was the only thing keeping me going.

Nicole and Alex arrived at the hospital with Makenna. My heart nearly burst, getting my daughter back in my arms. They couldn't stay long, they were flying back to Charlotte that morning. I thanked them for everything and promised to keep them updated.

There had been no change overnight in Ryan's condition. That was good and bad at the same time.

I stayed at Ryan's bedside with Makenna until she began to get fussy. I knew a hospital ICU room was not the ideal place for an infant, especially one who clearly adored her daddy, and whimpered because her daddy as asleep, but what could I do? I couldn't leave Ryan. What if he woke up and I wasn't there? No, they would have to drag me out of here kicking and screaming to get me to leave.

"Olivia, honey, I'm going to take Makenna back to the hotel. Why don't you come with me and get a couple hours of sleep. Your dad will stay here, and if anything changes, he will let you know immediately. Please. You're clearly exhausted." My mom practically begged me.

I shook my head emphatically. "I'm not leaving." I insisted.

"Would you at least eat something?" She asked with a frown.

"I'm not hungry." I insisted.

"Olivia please. You won't do Ryan any good if you don't take care of yourself." She pleaded with me again.

Finally, I agreed. She was right, I did need to take better care of myself.

After she left to get me some food, I directed my attention back to Ryan and took his hand.

"Like I could ever leave you sweetheart. I need to be here when you open those beautiful blue eyes. Maybe I'm being selfish, because I want to be the first person you see when you wake up. I don't want you to worry about anything. We are handling everything. My mom and dad are taking turns with Makenna when she's not with me. We know your mom and dad need to be here with you, so they are more than fine taking care of her." 

I thought I felt him squeeze my hand, so I sat there for several minutes, watching his face for some kind of sign, for anything, but nothing. Maybe I imagined it.

*******

Day 3

Still no change. Throughout the day and night, I sat here and talked to him, I held his hand, I begged him to come back to me. I only left his bedside to give Dave and Lisa and the rest of the family time with him, while I took time with Makenna.

That night, I somehow managed to doze off. I guess I was just that exhausted that I was able to fall asleep in this hard plastic chair.

It was the cramping woke me up. Then the bleeding began. No doubt about it, I was having a miscarriage. No one even knew that I was pregnant. I was not far along at all, and I was hopeful that everything would pass on its own and I would not need any medical intervention. I would just need to monitor myself closely. I could not deal with this right now. Surprisingly, I felt more numb than anything. I know how wrong that sounds, but I could not allow myself to feel anything else. Everything was just so overwhelming.

I found a nurse and was able to get some sanitary napkins and some ibuprofen for the cramping, but I kept the miscarriage to myself. Let her think I was on my period. Ryan was the main priority, I didn't need everyone worrying about me as well. Luckily, my mom had brought me a change of clothes earlier, and after changing, I tossed my soiled pants into the biohazard container.

"I'm so sorry sweetheart." I whispered, allowing myself to mourn for just a few moments.

******

Day 4

It did not appear that I was having any complications from the miscarriage. The cramping was controlled by the ibuprofen and the bleeding was much like a slightly heavy menstral period. I could get through this. I had to get through this.

Meanwhile, Ryan began showing signs of coming out of his coma. He squeezed my hand several times, so I know that I was not imagining it. He was also blinking his eyes.

The doctors were pleased by the follow up scans on Ryan,that there was no further bleeding in his brain, and that the swelling was very minimal. His vitals remained good, yet he still had not woken up. However, they believed it would not be long.

Day 5 and 6

No change. Vitals remained stable but he had yet to wake up.

Day 7

My mom, dad and I continued to take turns with Makenna. I kept her with me for a bit while Dave and Lisa took their turns by Ryan's bedside. I still had yet to leave to hospital though. I catnapped here and there, managing to get a little rest, although my mom kept trying to persuade me to go back to the hotel, I was adamant about staying.

That evening, I was beginning to doze off for a bit, my eyes were so heavy, but they quickly snapped open when Ryan squeezed my hand again. As I directed my gaze to his face, he opened his eyes, and looked right at me.

"Lauren?" He asked weakly, blinking a few times, almost as if he could not believe what he was seeing.

Lauren?

"No Ry. It's me." I whispered. Why was Ryan asking about his old girlfriend? I wondered, but dismissed it. He was just waking up from a coma and was bound to be confused.

"Livvy? Is that you?" He asked softly, blinking a few more times.

"It's me Ry. I'm here." I felt the tears begin to stream down my face and I squeezed his hand.

"It's been so long Livvy. Why are you here? Where am I? What's going on? Where's Lauren?" He pulled his hand from mine, his chest rapidly rising and falling, and I could see the look of panic in his eyes. His heart rate was climbing, high enough to set off an alarm.

Before I knew it, doctors and nurses were rushing into the room, and I was being pushed out.