How long can I keep Smiling

Therapy?!

I got up and got dressed heading to my home room class and waiting for it to start, Tetsutetsu decided to strike up a conversation with me while the teacher hadn't show up yet "So Monoma, Your birthday is coming up, are you going to celebrate with a big party? I heard your parents are loaded so since there your parents are they going to throwing you a huge party?" He asked and I gulped.

My parents stopped throwing party's for me after they found out I was a disgrace, so no.....they weren't going to throw a party for me.... but I didn't want them to look bad so I made up a lie "Oh no....my parents don't believe in birthday parties after they age of 7 so yeah I stopped having birthdays a while ago....." I said and Tetsutetsu looked a little disappointed but seemed to understand.

"Oh okay, well do you do anything special for your birthday anyways? Because I want to get you something." He said and I remembered the only presents I ever got for my birthday was from my sister and brother, and Askari, I never really had any friends so I never got anything.

"Oh you don't have to do that really." I tell him.

"No, I insist on getting you something for your birthday! Just wait and see as your best friend I'll get you the best present ever." He says and that's when Mr. Kan walks in.

"Alright class in your seats, Monoma your older brother is here to pick you up at the front of the school for a doctors appointment, your free to leave." He said and I was confused, I visited the doctor last week.

I get up and head to the front of the school where Miko was waiting "Whats the lie for you'd never let me skip school?" I said and he sighed.

"Just come with me Neito." He said grabbing my wrist and walking having me in tow behind him.

When we got to the building I immediately recognized this place as the Therapists office "What the fuck! Miko I told you I never wanted to come here again!" I said and he sighed.

"I know....but this is what's best for you Neito. Now come on the session starts soon." He grabs my hand and pulls me up the stairs.

I glare at him with stone eyes, fuming with rage....these appointments never helped,  the therapist never understood and will never understand what I go through! I walk into the room and Miko leaves.

I sit on the couch "Lay down Neito." The therapist says.

"No I prefer to sit and now Lay....." I tell him coldly and he doesn't say anything in response.

"So I heard your cutting again? Why's that?" He asks and I stay quiet "Neito if you don't tell me the problem I'll never be able to help you." He says and I continue to stay quiet "Please tell me what's wrong, I need to know the problem so I can help you." He says and I finally break and yell at him.

"YOU DON'T WANT TO HELP ME! YOU COULD CARE LESS IF I DIE! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO HAVE DEPRESSION! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING! ONE OF THE MANY REASONS OF THE PROBLEM IS YOU! YOUR ONE OF THE PROBLEMS THESE SHITTY THERAPY SESSIONS DON'T HELP I HAVE BEEN TO FIFTEEN AND STILL THERES NO HELP!" I yell at him and threw all of that he was still calm.

"I understand that you feel that w-." I cut him off as soon as he said those idiotic words that he 'Understands'

"NO YOU DON'T! YOU DON'T! YOU'LL NEVER UNDERSTAND THAT I JUST WANT TO DIE AND NEVER COMR BACK!" I say and Storm out of the office.

Miko tried to stop me but I push him away "Neito please this is what's best for you!" He says and I turn to face him tears falling from my cheeks every second.

"No you don't! Don't act like you understand! Because you don't! You don't know what it's like! Those stupid therapists never helped me in the past! And they never will now!" I say and Storm off roaming the streets trying to find my way back to U.A.

I wandered the streets for a few hours, I didn't know my way back because I was in a part of the city I never really got to know and I was to scared to ask for directions.

Eventually it was night out and I had left my phone in my brothers car so I couldn't use a GPS or call one of my friends to help me.

I wandered into a abandoned and really dark street when I heard laughs behind me, I turned to see a man with one eye and he was bald, the guy beside him had dark grey hair with fox ears and a tail he had paws for hands and sideburns on his face "Hey kid give us your money!" The bald one pointed a knife at me.

"Wait bro look he's from U.A. that hero school." The Wolf man pointed out.

"Hero school? I hate hero's......" the man whipped his head to me "So kid you want to be a mighty hero? Solving others problems? Heh how stupid!" He said and I was backing away.

"What's wrong~ I thought Hero's were supposed to fight villains like us." The wolf guy chuckled and I got ready to run away but he must have noticed because he came at me and dug his paw threw my chest.

The man with the knife came and stabbed me in the stomach and I tried to scream but I couldn't.

And soon enough I blacked out, I thought this was it, this was how I die and I was happy to accept that I was dying.

I even grew a smile on my face, when suddenly I heard the beeping of a life support machine and the next thing I knew was I woke up in the hospital.

I looked around to find bandages over my chest and had a ventilator on my mouth, I took it off and I heard a door flung open and my brother rush in with Askari by his side "NEITO!" He yells and rushes to my side "Who did this to you?! I'll kill them!" He yells and I look down.

"You could loose your job if you do that." I say.

"I don't care! Whoever hurt you is dead to me!" He yells and I sigh.

"How did I get here? no one was around in the neighbourhood I got attacked in." I questioned.

"Some kids from your school said they were in class 1-A said they were having a class party and got lost, and one of their class men saw you getting attacked so they rushed over unfortunately the guys that attacked you got away." He said and I was confused.

Why would 1-A help me? Did they do it fo mock me afterwards that they had to save my life? I'm pathetic.

"Oh.....tell them I say thank...." I said not wanting to face them.

"I know you bully them Neito but it doesn't have to be that way! You don't need to impress Mom of Dad-." I cut him off.

"Just please! Don't bring them up.....leave me alone....I need some time alone." I say and he nods visibly upset and walks out Askari by his side.

I sat there and began to cry and the disappointment and weakling I am.

Why why couldn't I protect myself! I had to get the people I am forced to hurt to impress my parents, to save me, when I just want to end it all! My depressing, pathetic life, I just want it to end.

Why? Why can't I end it all? Why do they care if I die?! I am nothing to worry about......