fix you (13rw)

Chapter 25

Alex

The metallic taste of blood didnt leave my mouth, it stayed and latched on to my taste buds. My lower lip was swollen, my upper lip was numb. The cut on my lip had dry blood around it. I couldnt help but flinch everytime my tongue accidentally touch the wound.

It was Peter who fetched me, we were quiet on our ride home. He respected my silence but I knew he was worried. I also caught in my eye that he texted my dad. The message itself, I wasnt exactly sure.

Pushing Zach away from my thoughts wasnt easy. I was pissed at him, for letting Luke threaten him. I was annoyed at him, for not standing up for me, for us. I was furious, for fucking punching me. The whole school witnessed it, our circle of friends saw it. I was embarassed and humiliated, Zach let Luke hurt me. I wouldnt say it was his responsibility to protect me, but he was my boyfriend for fuck's sake. The least he could do was not let Luke get into his head, he failed at that.

I had been receiving countless text messages from my friends. Still no text message from Zach. I turned off my phone, I didnt want to talk to any of my friends. Not now. I knew Zach punched me in the fucking face, but was it weird that I still wanted for him to follow me, to prove to me how much he loved me.

His fear was valid. I was not out yet so I knew the feeling too, of always being careful on how you act, how the walls were instantly up when you were with other people. It was a feeling that was not new to me. I understood Zach. I knew how scared he was of his mom finding out about him and our relationship.

Maybe, I was just not expecting Zach, out of all people, to hurt me. And you know what hurt me the most, we had the best night last night. We had sex, I gave him a part of me that now belonged to us. I was afraid he would leave me after that night but he didnt. I woke up beside him, he held me like he was afraid to break me, someone who was fragile.

A fist hitting my face, was actually not that bad. But knowing it was Zach's fist, made the punch sting a little bit more.

"Alex," Peter said. He stopped the car, I looked outside and we were already in front of our house. "You don't have to tell me what happened, but if someone's bullying you, just tell me and I'll handle it myself."

I didnt answer my brother, I licked my lips and winced as I accidentally hit the cut on my lower lip. I opened the car door, leaving my brother inside the car. Before walking away, I turned around and forced a smile at my brother.

"Thank you for picking me up." I would always be grateful for my brother. Peter never failed to make me feel loved, he became a new man after my failed suicide attempt.

"Anything to help, little brother." Peter gave me a geniuine smile. I used to hate hearing him call me little brother, but hearing him now say those words made me feel protected.

I noticed the police car was parked in front of our house. Finally connecting the dots, Peter told my dad about my situation.

When I opened the door, my mom rushed herself towards my direction. I wasnt expecting to see her here, she was supposed to be at her work at this time of the day. She looked stressed and teary eyed, she rubbed my shoulders and cupped my face. Her touch making me feel nothing but safety and assurance.

"Alex," She sounded worried, her voice was shaking. "What happened to you?"

"Its nothing." I tried faking another smile but I saw my reflection on my mom's eyes. I looked lost, battered and bruised. Not just on the outside, but I could feel it inside. I was hurting. I felt bad for myself.

Tears started falling down and then I broke down in front of my mom. The next thing I knew, I was sobbing on her shoulders and she was rubbing my back, whispering comforting words in my ears.

"Alex, we love you." My mom was already crying too. "You know that right?"

"I dont want you to hate me." I muttered as I let my tears blind my vision.

"We can never hate you, Alex." She pulled back and cupped my face with her warm hands. I saw my dad looking at us, watching us from the couch. I wanted to be transparent with them. I needed them to know this part of me, the part of me that always blamed myself for being different. For not being normal. For being a freak.

"Im gay." I was not sure if i was just dreaming or i was hallucinating. My mom hugged me tight, then I felt another pair of arms around me. It was my dad.

"We love you, Alex." My dad kissed the top of my head.

When I was finally stable, we sat on the couch and I started telling them about what happened. How Luke Holliday had been harrasing us, threatening and blackmailing Zach. How Zach and I didnt tell anyone about our relationship because of Luke and because he was afraid of his mom, who was strict and conservative. I told them that it was Zach who punched me. I could feel the intensity from my dad's eyes, he didnt like what he was hearing. He excused myself, leaving me and my mom on the couch.

"So," I asked, afraid she would start telling me to pack up and leave the house. "You're not mad?"

"Why would I be mad?" She placed her hand on my leg.

"Because I wouldnt be able to give you grandkids?" I had read articles about parents fears over their kids being gay. One of the fear that was always there was, the fear of their legacy getting cut off.

"Im pretty sure Peter will give me one," She shook her head and placed a hand on my cheek. "Do you really think I would get mad just because you prefer to date boys over girls?"

"Kind of." I admitted.

"Never, Alex." My mom rubbed my cheek. "As long as you're happy, your dad and I will always be here to support you."

My dad came back with a band aid on his hand, he was carrying a bottle of an anti bacterial ointment and a box of cotton. He cleaned the cut on my lip and covered it with a band aid to fasten the healing process.

I yawned and felt my body giving up, my mom kissed my forehead and suggested that I sleep on the couch. So, I did what she said took a nap on the couch. It was not the perfect place to sleep but I was so tired and going upstairs would require an effort that I could no longer give.

I dreamt of Zach Dempsey. He kissed me in my dream, we were bare naked, he was holding me. I was holding him back. He kissed the top of my nose and I giggled, I playfully bit his cheek and he just laughed at me. Zach whispered. "I'll never hurt you, Alex. I promise."

Then I woke up to the sound of knocking on our front door. I saw my dad opening the door at corner of my eyes.

"Sir," It was Zach. "Can I talk to Alex?"

"Alex told us everything," This was the first time I heard my dad talk like that, he was dead serious. "Zach I know you are a good guy."

"Sir." I heard Zach mutter.

"Alex is a very fragile kid. Me and his mom have been trying our best to protect him from any harm after he tried to kill himself," My dad's voice eas sharp and dangerous. "And you hurt him. I can never forgive you for that."

"Sir, I'm sorry." Zach was pleading. I wanted to come out so bad, accept his apology and tell him I was no longer blaming him. But I couldnt, because deep down, I was still blaming Zach.

"I dont want to see you near Alex," My dad sighed. Im so sorry, Zach. "Go home, Zach."

-

Im sorry for breaking Zalex up for a short while, I promise its for the better.

Late upload but its still here. Hope you guys enjoy this chapter.

You guys are crazy were almost on 9k reads. Thank you so much omg.

- G