Hurt me once //Deh and Bmc One-shots

In case you don't live forever // EH

⚠️Huge TW: death+ description, sadness, depression, blood, violence, slurs⚠️
Requested by: realmichaelmell

P.O.V Michael Mell, at Jake's party in the bathroom.

After Jeremy left me alone with the words 'Out of my way, Loser!' I can't hold all my emotions back anymore and feel like my world doesn't make sense at all, what am I worth again? I just got replaced by a supercomputer which doesn't even care about feelings or anything, just some useless tic tac planted in his brain.
Was it my own fault?
Did I ignore some signs?
I should have talked to him and not agreed to his plan with the Squip.
Fuck.

I feel myself sitting down in the bathtub again while my entire body is shaking and my vision is becoming more and more blurry with every second because of the tears which begin to form in my eyes.
It doesn't take another two seconds until the first tear runs down my cheek, followed by another one and another one and another one until my face is full of salty tears.

I shouldn't be like that, why do I care? I should be used to rejections.

Something inside of me was screaming I should get home as fast as possible, hiding under my covers as long as possible, breathing as calm as possible.

I am about to stand up when another shaking is going through my body and I slide into another panic attack within seconds.

My breathing gets heavier and heavier until my chest feels like someone is holding me with big ropes around it, my whole face is hurting from the crying and sobbing and even when I try my best to make it stop it isn't working.
I close my eyes and hug my knees, waiting for it to fucking stop but it takes more than ten minutes...and then it is already too late.

P.O.V Rich G, livingroom downstairs.

''Rich, put that down!'' Jake shouts to me with a terrified voice while I am holding up a lighter and some gasoline in my hands, my hands shaking more than ever before.

Why do you make me do this?! I almost sound crying while talking to my Squip.
The alcohol in you §ý§țəm needs to get øūţ, only one way. Error. Error. Error.
What?!

I am not focused in exact this moment and the gasoline spread all over the carpet, followed by the lighter which falls with an opened fire on top of it.
The flames are reflecting in my eyes while they grow taller and taller until I think I will die here, maybe that is for the best though..

''Rich for fucks sake! Get away there!'' I hear Jake screaming loudly even though everyone else is already running outside he still stays here but I can't get rid of the feeling that something or someone is missing.
''Go outside Jake!'' I yell back and jump over the table, escaping the fire wall infront of me fastly and I sprint to the stairs, feeling the smoke get into my lungs and I immediately start coughing but that wouldn't stop me from jumping three stairs at the same time upstairs until I arrive at the second floor.

''Rich! Please!'' I hear the panic in Jake's voice but I carry on walking, punching against every door for checking if here is anyone inside which missed everything and needs help.

''Someone in here?!'' I yell while punching against the bathroom door several times until I hear a quiet coughing.

My heart sinks and I begin to kick against the door for saving whoever is in there.