𝑯𝑨𝑹𝑴 & 𝑯𝑶𝑷𝑬; 𝑳𝑨𝑺𝑯𝑻𝑶𝑵

chapter 2

loud and beautiful.

that's what ashton thought about the thunder.

it was loud, obnoxious, and a lot and people were scared of the loud, cackling sounds it would make.

ashton, however, wasn't scared. he loved storms. he loved the feeling rain gave him, the orchestra of sounds as it laid its soft touch among the different surfaces of the earth, how thunder declared itself as some rockstar upon the stage. even how beautiful it looked when the lightening lit up the sky in blinding streaks.

it was a safe place. a time when he felt comfortable. a time where everything was okay, when he felt as thought he would be okay.

some would say that it's stupid, how enthralled he was by he rain, thunder and lighting. some would say it's weird, but what's not weird about ashton?

he didn't care what they thought. lies.

one thing he did know, was that the storm made him calm. it made him feel alive, something he's not used to feeling. it's beautiful, truly beautiful.

the pitter patter of rain on his marked skin nearly made him want to cry, it was just so overwhelming.

with the feeling of bliss and love and safety, ashton laid down on the road, right in the middle.

he could die a happy man. he could die with the rain cascading down his skin, causing irritated red patches from how harsh and heavy it was.

it would be perfect.

almost as perfect as if luke was laying here next to him.

but he wouldn't let luke do that, no matter how much he cared about him. he wouldn't ever be selfish enough to let himself get luke hurt.

he couldn't imagine ever putting that man in pain, even though he knows he's already mentally done it.

so here he was, laying in the rain, having the time of his life. alone. but that's okay, sometimes these gorgeous moments are meant to be captured alone, to be remembered by only one heart.

it was painful, just a little. the hard rain pouring into his skin.

he loved it. adored it even.

he felt like he was in heaven, exactly where he knew he would never go. he's too impure.

the only time when ashton felt like he wasn't the only person in the world with endless flaws was when it was storming and he was in the middle of it.

the storms had their flaws. sometimes they didn't know when to stop, so they caused floods. sometimes they were too strong, and blew away people's childhood homes. sometimes, the beautiful strikes of lighting may hit the wrong place and do more ugly things then pretty.

they had flaws. big ones. and that's what made ashton love them so much. that's what made ashton feel so not alone.

luke used to lay out here with him, when they were both younger. back when ashton used to be so bad with his mental health. back when he nearly lost the battle.

luke would see him out here, by himself, laying in the rain. he would walk out, not ever once questioning what ashton was doing or why he was out there, he only just laid there with him, sometimes even wrapping his arms around the older boy.

little did ashton know that sometimes luke needed the same escape. to have a rest from all the hardships life threw at people.

luke needed ashton, but ashton never knew that. ashton just thought that he was trying to be nice, trying to be a good friend and help ashton.

not once in his selfish little head did he ever begin to think that maybe luke needed it just as much as ashton did, that maybe luke was a little damaged aswell.

as the rain pooled around ashton, he felt as though someone was watching him. he felt a presence, and then he heard heavy footsteps walking towards him.

he didn't bother to look up as he knew who it was, and when a pair of long legs was laid out next to him, he didn't know what to say.

so, he stayed silent. because that's what ashton's good at. staying silent.

"i'm sorry for upsetting you earlier ash, i should've just left it. i didn't mean to make you angry, i just want to help you, to know that you're okay, ash," luke said, talking loudly to be heard over the rain.

ashton didn't know what to say. why did he apologise? ashton should've been the one to say sorry, he was the one who messed up and lied. luke was only being himself, a caring person.

"it's okay lu, don't apologise. you were only trying to make sure i was okay, i didn't need to snap at you. it was stupid. i'm sorry," ashton said back, heartbeat picking up as it normally did when he was around luke.

luke turned and stared at him, looking straight into his eyes. luke's eyes captivated ashton. they were so goddamn beautiful. nothing would ever compare to the beauty that was within in those gorgeous blue eyes, nothing.

no words were shared, only meaningful glances. it was silent, it was perfect.

then, the silence was broken by a deep, beautiful voice.

"i'm scared, ash,"

ashton started to panic. what was luke worried about? did something happen? does he like a girl? did someone hurt him? what happene-

"i'm scared that you're not okay," luke said, voice lowering quiet a lot, nearly a whisper lost in the whisps of rain.

ashton didn't know what to say. he wanted to comfort luke and tell him that he was okay, to not put luke through the same hell he did 4-5 years ago. but another part of him wanted to be honest. to let it all out and tell luke exactly what was happening, exactly what was going on. he wanted luke to know because he knew that he could help.

but ashton was stupid. and ashton was over being selfish.

"it's okay luke, you don't have to worry about me. i'm okay, it's just a phase. i'll admit i'm not feeling the best right now, but i'm okay and not doing anything stupid. i'm sorry for worrying you lu,"

luke smiled small at ashton, nodding his head.

"i know you're lying ash, but it's okay. i know you'll tell me when you're ready. i love you, and i'll always be by your side to make sure that you're going to be okay," luke said, wrapping his arms around ashton and pulling him close.

ashton's heart sped up. how the hell does luke know literally everything?? it's great, but almost annoying how observant he can be.

also, luke said that he loved him. ashton knew that it was in a friendly way, because luke was straight and wouldn't go for ashton even if he was gay or bi.

"i love you too, luke. thank you for everything, i mean it," ashton replied with a shaky voice.

because ashton did love luke,

more than he would ever know.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

ya girl is back with another chapter! i honestly don't really know what to write in these things lmao whoops. this is also a boring chapter, but a little look into luke's feelings, and his and ash's past together👀

how are you liking the story so far?

anyways,
i love y'all, stay safe,
-grace xo