Lullaby of Your Embrace (COMPLETED)

Chapter 12

Benjamin and I were hugging more than ever, if that was even possible. I had gotten so used to his touch, that the moments he wasn't clinging to me or not beside me felt strange. I was also beginning to dread the moment we had to part and beginning to consider just asking him to move in.

I tiredly climbed the stairs and entered my room. When I had finished my assignments, Jasmine called. I picked it up with a sigh.

"We haven't met up in a while," she said in a sad voice. "I miss you."

I knew she had other intentions, but I told her to come over in the afternoon to hang out.

"And when is the swing dance for this week?" I asked.

"We've been having weather issues so... For now, Friday is looking good," she answered. I missed the atmosphere and hoped Friday's weather will remain perfect.

Later, I received a call from Benjamin asking about our swing dance practice for the evening.

"I have to cancel... I told Jasmine that I'd meet up with her."

"Can I join?" he suddenly asked, and I didn't know how to answer him. Jasmine probably expected only us two to hang out. I told him I'll call him back and let him know. Then, I called Jasmine.

"Is it okay if Benjamin comes, too? It's okay if you might want it only to be us two—"

"Sure! Let him come!" she shouted, and I was taken aback by her change of tone. I was suddenly worried.

"Are you sure? Positively sure?"

"Yes, yes, definitely."

"Are you planning something? Why do you sound like you're planning something? He's only a friend, Jasmine. Don't act weird in front of him and make weird remarks."

"I won't embarrass you."

"No, it's not that—"

"I know, I know. I also want to meet him; I've never directly talked to him. He's really good at swing dancing."

I nodded and ended the call. I hoped nothing bad would happen. We'd just watch a movie, eat some popcorn, maybe play a board game. I breathed in and out, convincing myself it was going to be fun.

***

Jasmine sat across from Benjamin, and I went to the kitchen to grab a bag of chips. The evening had been going well, so far. We had watched a short movie and finished playing UNO. However, something was deeply troubling me: Benjamin hadn't been hugging me—not as excessively as he used to, anyway. I believed Jasmine's presence might be part of the reason. Nonetheless, I've already mentally formed a list of everything I might have done wrong, and I was ready to discuss it with him when I had the chance. Aside from that, Jasmine and Benjamin seemed to be getting along, and I was quite happy about it. I strolled back into the living room and placed the bag of Lays on the table.

"When she saw you dancing, do you know what she said?" Jasmine asked.

"What?" Benjamin curiously leaned forward. Both their eyes glistened. I suddenly lunged at Jasmine before she could expose me, and covered her mouth with my hands.

"Mmmm mmm," Jasmine struggled to remove my hands. I knew I was overreacting, and it only made me more suspicious in front of Benjamin, but I didn't want her to tell him I said he's beautiful. Frankly, it was embarrassing. Benjamin walked towards me, hugged my back, and pulled me off her. I was now struggling against his embrace to go back and cover Jasmine's mouth.

"Go ahead," he said. Jasmine looked at me, and I sent her a deadly glare. She nervously laughed and retracted, "I still want to be friends with her, so maybe she should tell you, instead." Benjamin turned me around to face him, and I could feel my heart pounding out of my chest. In his arms and pulled in close to his face, it now seemed like I was caged in. Rather than the usual tenderness, there was fear. I knew he was going to make me say it.

"Tell me. I'm curious," he said. I tried to squirm out of his grasp, but he only tightened around me.

"It's nothing, nothing!" It wasn't a big deal at first, but now it had become one. A part of me also wanted to see how far he'd go to make me say it.

"Why are you acting like this if it's nothing?"

Jasmine abruptly got up, her cheeks flushed. "I have to go. I'll call you later," she hurriedly said. Before I could utter a word, I heard the door shut. I was left alone to deal with the mess she started and I inflamed. Benjamin suddenly pulled me closer and whispered, "Tell me."

"I-I don't want to," I said, my body heating up.

"You can't do this."

"I'm not doing anything. You're the one who keeps—"

"Keeps what?" he asked and abruptly pushed me to the couch behind me. I gasped as I fell on the cushions. Benjamin came and sat on my lap, his knees trapping me. My soul ushered out of my body.

"I keep what?" he asked, putting his hands on my shoulders and bending his face closer to mine.

"Okay, okay! I said you're beautiful! I said you're beautiful!"

He held my gaze for a few moments and then got off my lap to sit beside me. I sunk into the couch, slightly panting.

"Beautiful..." he muttered. "You really think I am?" he turned to me.

I hated how innocently he looked at me; He had a calm composure, and I was a sweating mess beside him. Anger morphed to courage. I got up on my knees and pushed him down. I slowly maneuvered between his legs and got up to his face.

"Let me see," I answered, placing my hand on his chin and turning his face back and forth. I could tell he was nervous because he clenched his fists tightly on the couch, but his intense gaze remained on me. His hair was sticking out all over the place, and his mouth was clamped shut. I licked my own lips and muttered, "You are." Then, I quickly shifted to get off him. However, his arms suddenly wrapped around me and pulled. I fell back on his chest.

"Be-Ben," I stammered. All my courage had been used up. I was, once again, a stuttering mess.

"Let me hug you for as long as I want," he said. I was slightly relieved at this request; my earlier worries evaporated. It might have been because of Jasmine, after all.

"Not like this," I replied nervously. "We can sit up and—"

"Why not? It's comfortable like this."

"Is it really comfortable for you?" I asked quietly. Our bodies were lined up in all the right places, and I feared for both our sanities. He must have understood the fear in my voice because he turned to his side and let me lie beside him. His arms went around my neck, and I let it be. Today had been exhausting.

I woke up amidst the darkness and looked at the clock on my wall: 3:28 AM. Benjamin was still beside me, his arms in the same position. I yawned and brought my head back down. Then, I moved my hand over Benjamin's head and managed to grab my phone from the table. I had six missed calls and some texts from Jasmine, and I internally groaned. I didn't have an excuse for what she saw yesterday. I put my phone back down, and my arm fell on Benjamin's side. I closed my eyes and shifted closer to his warmth.