Rainbow Six: November Sun

45: "LET GO"

"Not since school," Finka managed, taken off-guard by the sudden encounter.

"NSU seems like such a long time ago, and—" Natalya paused, and her eyes widened at the sight of Finka's scar. "Oh, Jesus, Lera! What happened?"

Lera rolled her eyes. "Accident."

"Accident?!" the other woman echoed. "What, an accidental knife fight or something?"

"Would you believe me if that was the case?"

Natalya squeezed her eyes shut and lowered her voice, embarrassed. "I'm sorry for being rude. I didn't even notice at first. I swear."

"It's fine. I promise." Lera noticed the concierge staring at her from the front desk. She turned back to Natalya. "Are you staying here at the hotel?"

"I am. Business. Here for the night. Maybe two. You?"

"Business. Well... vacation, actually."

"Fantastic!" Natalya exclaimed gleefully. "How long?"

Finka wasn't sure of the answer, and the sudden crisis in Washington, D.C. surged back into her thoughts. "Few more days," she replied vaguely.

"We have to get together," Natalya declared. "Even if just for coffee. It's been so long."

Normally, Finka disliked social life and its many annoying nuances, but Natalya's enthusiasm was infectious as always, and she found herself nodding her agreement. "Tonight perhaps?"

"Great. Meet you down here at 9:00 or so? I have a meeting with a client at 7:00."

"Sure. Clients, Natalya?" Finka asked, grinning. "Look at you, all grown up now. What do you do?"

"Corporate law, actually."

"What? No kidding?"

"Yep." Natalya assumed a purposely-over dramatic pose. "Rosneft Oil."

Finka whistled, impressed. "Wow. Good for you. That is impressive as hell."

Natalya bowed ceremoniously, curtsy and all, coaxing a hearty laugh from Finka. "Spasibo, spasibo," she said. "Anyhow, I must go. It's so great to run into you, Lera. Truly." The woman tapped at her phone. "Let's exchange numbers. I'll text you later to meet here. We can catch up."

* * *

Finka took the elevator back up to the seventh floor. She smiled to herself.

Back at Novosibirsk State University, Natalya had always been easygoing, carefree. Now, nearly a decade later, she was still youthful as always, her enthusiasm still just as contagious as it had been back then - despite being a leading attorney for one of the most powerful companies in Russia.

So blissful was Natalya's energy that Finka had forgotten about the envelope in her hand.

The elevator dinged to a stop, and the woman stepped off into the seventh floor hallway. She trudged towards her room, her attention focused on the pckage in her hand as she peeled away the seal.

Inside was a folded letter, with what appeared to be a note, handwritten in ink.

Finka made her way to her room. She closed the door behind her, went to the mini bar, and poured a small glass of vodka before retiring to the couch next to a floor lamp.

She turned on the light, unfurled the letter, and took a breath before reading.

Lera,

If you are reading this letter, it means things have gone south in D.C. - as you are surely already aware, since I doubt you've done much to distract yourself from worldly headlines.

I've asked you to unplug, to take a break from things. Clear your mind, find your voice.

I know this is not an easy thing to ask of you. You are one of the most talented, driven individuals I've ever had the pleasure of meeting, and the privilege of working with. Even now, as you read these words, I know half of your mind is on the headlines you must have seen today, while the other half is thinking about your research efforts back here at base.

I know you are questioning yourself, second-guessing your own efforts, wondering if perhaps you, or Doc, missed something during your last study. I know you cannot rest. I know the future is an ugly thing that bares its teeth every time you look at it.

And now, Lera, I ask you to let go.

Let go of your companions. Let go of me. Know that we will be okay without you as we face whatever it is we might currently be facing in D.C. Know that even though we are stronger with you, we are all hoping for you to find inner peace, above all else.

Finka was biting her lip. She had not cried in a very long time, and so the urge to do so felt foreign and uncomfortable as she continued.

Our safety does not depend on you. This is not your burden. You have such a big heart that sometimes you take on more burden than you can bear. Your teammates are the best in the entire world. Let them do their work, so you may focus instead on working on yourself.

I want you to unplug, walk the streets, breathe. Look up at the clouds, the sky, the stars, and simply admire that which is always there, yet hard for us to take time to see.

Rather than be arrested by fear or anxiety, let go - even if just for a few days - and realize that you've worked hard. Every breath you take, every breeze through your hair, every smile you see, every word you utter; you've earned it. Your research sent your neuropathy into remission.

Now relax, and know we're all in this together. That's an order. ~ Harry

Finka felt a sensation wash over her that she did not recognize. She curled up on the loveseat, letter still in-hand, and fought the tears welling up in her eyes.