Daddy issues

chapter four

Kairi (age 17/present day)

"Hey, mom. Do you know how long it'll be until you're back from your trip?" I ask into the phone.

About three months ago, my mother met a guy named Michael and they started dating. He invited her to go on a roadtrip across the country and she gladly agreed.

They left without me because I still had school, so now I've just been sitting at home taking care of myself.

"Um, I've been meaning to speak to you about that... Michael and I are adding another two months to the trip, so I added more money in your account in case of emergencies."

I gulped back my tears, letting out a shaky breath. "I have to go, Kai. I'll call you soon okay?" She didn't even give me time to answer before she hung up.

I held the phone to my ear, listening to the beeps from the disconnected call.

I threw my phone to the side of my bed, going into my bathroom to take a shower.

My father had invited me over to his house for dinner. He said he had an important announcement to tell me, so I agreed to go.

Maybe if it went well, I could ask him to stay over until my mom came back. I was tired of being alone.

I came back into my room, my towel wrapped around my waist. I looked through my closet, choosing out a navy blue button down, paired with beige khakis. I found shoes to match my outfit and slid them on.

I looked in the mirror, styling my hair in a middle part. My hair was fairly long now, I'd have to schedule a haircut.

I grabbed my keys, locking up the house before leaving. I had to take my bike since in order to go on their roadtrip, my mom and Michael had to take my car.

My mom used to have a car, until Michael totaled it after a night of drinking.

***

I checked my phone, making sure that I was at the right address. I had never been to my father's new house and I was quite shocked to see that it was huge.

We had been middle class my whole life, and I didn't remember my dad making this much money.

I was also shocked to see a for sale sign in the front lawn. Why would they sell such a beautiful house?

I walked up to the door, knocking hesitantly. I felt like a stranger.

And in some ways, I was.

Karen opened the door, smiling softly when she saw that it was me.

"Come in, come in." She says moving aside to let me pass.

I walk in admiring the beautiful decor of the house.

Karen leads me to the dining room where my dad and Maiya were seated.

"Hello, Kairi. I'm glad you could make it."

I just smiled and nodded politely. Of course I made it, I literally sit around every day hoping that you'll show me the slightest bit of attention. I'd never miss an opportunity to see you.

I took a seat across from my dad. Maiya was sitting next to me, playing with a doll.

Her doll was pretty, with almost unrealistic features. I smiled slightly at the little figurine in my sister's hand.

Growing up, I never got to play with the toys I wanted. Instead of barbie's and playhouses, I got trucks and footballs.

Instead of trying out for gymnastics, I was forced into soccer. Not that I minded that much. If my father wanted me to do something, then I'd do it to please him. Yet, he never seemed pleased by my efforts to be the perfect son.

There was always something wrong.

Of course, I knew what it was. I always knew, but I didn't let myself acknowledge why he forced masculinity onto me.

I just accepted it, and taught myself to love men's things.

If my dad was interested in a certain car, I'd research on it.

If he like a sport, I'd watch it and learn the teams.

If he wore a certain clothing brand, I'd also wear their clothes.

Everything I did, every decision, it all had to please my father. Because maybe, if I was the perfect son, he'd actually love me back.

He'd actually want to spend time with me and not see me as a person from his past.

We began eating.

The room was oddly silent and I felt very uncomfortable.

I took a sip of my water, looking down at my plate.

After the weird silence, my dad cleared his throat.

"So, Kairi. I called you over to tell you some news." He started, looking at me dead in the eyes.

"I received a promotion at work, they're relocating me to the office in San Francisco! Which means that I'll be moving, tomorrow-"

"Wait, you're leaving?" I say, frowning.

"Well, yes. I got a job offer in California and I think that it'd be good for my girls so I'm taking it..." He said.

When he said that, something in me snapped.

"What about what's good for me? Huh? Have you ever stopped for one second and thought about how your decisions affect me? I'm your child too, dad! I was here way before them and its like if you forgot all about me!"

I stood up, looking at him with a deadly glare.

"I did everything for you. I changed myself to get you to notice me. I just wanted you to like me. You didn't have to love me, liking me would've been enough. But nothing I do is good enough for you. Not me being top of my class, not me being on Varsity soccer, not even me dressing like you. Everything goes over your head as if I don't exist until its convenient for you. Well, I'm tired of it. So leave, have a nice life. But just so you know, if you ever need me in the future, you missed your chance."

And with that I took off.

I stormed out of his house, getting on my bike and speeding away.

I was going really fast and my eyes were clouded by tears pooling in them. I could barely see.

My bike jerked forward, sending me crashing down onto the pavement.

I looked down at my scrapped knee and hands, finally letting my tears fall.

I dragged my bike out of the street, sitting down on the sidewalk, my knees pulled into my chest.

I sobbed silently, internally screaming.

I heard cars passing, but I paid no attention to them as I let all of my pent up emotions free themselves through my tears.

"Um, excuse me?" I heard a male's voice say from in front of me.

I sniffled, shaking my head hoping that they'd get the hint to leave me alone.

"What's a pretty little thing like you doing out here all alone?" The man asks walking closer to me.

"Oh, why are you crying baby?" He asks as I look up, meeting his eyes.

"My d-dad just l-left me." I answered sadly.

"That's alright. I'll be your daddy now."

"I'm Mattia." The man says, extending his hand.

____

lowkey let my inner resentment towards my father show out in this one 🙈

anyways, here's the moment some of us have been waiting for...

side note: i wish i could put in video attachments cause i really want yall to hear nico when he speaks... his voice is so mfing sexy ... lord. especially when he speaks in english, it makes me nut 😝

enjoy, wing wongs 🤩