Well...Alright | Buddy Holly

James (B.H)

August 1st, 1960. 7:04 pm. NYC Medical Center

I spent the best evenings of my life unaware they were significant.

Senior prom. My first show. My wedding night. The one when me and Vi laid in the grass for hours. Those all just past without much thought. They were just nights.

But this evening, this one I know is significant. This one will remain with me until the day I die.

This evening I became a father.

It started after lunch when Violet's water broke. I panicked while she remained calm and got her purse and shoes. We got to the hospital and I ran up, telling the receptionist that my wife was in labor.

From then until now was a complete blur. It all happened so fast yet so slow.

They took us up to the maternity ward and got Vi in a hospital gown. Doctors and nurses kept streaming in and seeing how Vi was doing and how dilated she was.

At 5:55 pm, Violet was all 10 centimeters dilated.

She was so calm the entire time. She didn't scream or whine or moan. She just squeezed my hand as tears silently streamed down her sweaty face.

At 6:22pm, I found out that I had a son. He entered the world quietly, not crying until the doctor swatted him. He let out the smallest whimper before he began screaming.

I got to cut the cord.

He was taken away to be cleaned up while Vi also was cleaned up.

At 7:04pm, I got to hold my son for the first time.

And here I am. I'm holding my child.

My flesh and blood.

My purpose in life.

He's here, swaddled in a blue blanket and hat as Vi drifts in and out of sleep.

Tears run down my face as I stare at him. He's so small. So fragile. So perfect.

He has whisps of red hair sticking out of his hat and laying down on his forehead.

I helped make this small being. He depends on me to take care of him. He's my responsibility. He's mine.

I've never felt this kind of genuine, unconditional love before. Never not once. I'll love him until the end of my life and then some. I never knew you could feel so strongly about something you had never seen until half an hour ago, but here I am. Completely head over heels in love with this baby.

His eyes are closed, I assume he's sleeping like his mother.

I've never been so happy. This is all I wanted in life. I wanted to start a family with my one true love, and I did it.

When I first saw that redheaded girl in the halls of Lubbock High, words escaped me. She was stunning. The most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I had no idea that me and that gorgeous girl would create a new life together.

But here I am.

This is the best life I could have ever asked for. My passion for music has made a great living, I married my soulmate, and I'm a brand new father.

Tears start to drop onto my glasses but I hardly care. I only care about watching this baby's every single move.

This is bliss.

10:00pm

Violet woke up a few minutes ago and is now holding our son, trying to breast feed. She looks as pretty as the day we met, even after nearly a decade and even after giving birth. Her hair is in a sloppy pony tail with bits around her face hanging out, all curly.

My son finally figures out how to latch. He lifts his little hand and places it by his face as he eats.

She gently presses her lips to his head. "I love you more than words can say," she whispers. "I'll always be here for you."

I gently push her bangs away from her eyes. "He's finally here." I say quietly. "He's real."

Tears fall from her face, landing on his head, causing her to giggle.

"He's perfect." I smile.

"He isn't an Arlo." She responds. "He just doesn't look like an Arlo."

"You're right." I wrap my arm around her shoulders. "What does he look like?"

She raises an eyebrow. "Conrad?"

"What about Mitchell?"

"Eric?"

"Charles?"

"Alan?"

"Robert?"

"Wesley?"

"James?" Vi says.

On cue, the baby opens his eyes widely.

"James?" I repeat. "Are you James?"

He blinks twice.

I look at Vi. She seems to understand too.

His name is James.

James Phillip Holley.

He picked his own first name.

Phillip comes from Phil Everly, who I promised to name one of my children after. He's one of my best friends, after all.

"James," Vi whispers. "James, my son James,"

"I love you, James," I say.

He furrows his little eyebrows and I laugh. "Not one for the verbal affection, James?" My god he's so cute.

He blinks again and continues to eat.

"We made that," I say. "Us, we made that little thing."

She nods, more tears slipping down her face. "We made this, just us, no one else."

"He's ginger, ugh," I tease. "Damn gingers,"

Vi lets out a small laugh. "Yeah, I hate those redheads."

I wonder if James will ever grow into brown hair. I guess it's fairly common for kids to be born with light hair and for it to darken. I sort of hope he does. He already looks a lot like I did when I was born.

"Look at how perfect he is," I feel my eyes well up again. "He's perfect!"

Vi gently strokes his head. "My baby. This is my baby. He's here and I get to hold him,"

"He's a little doll,"

"But I do have one gripe about him," Vi frowns. "He's late!"

He was due July 25th, but today's August 1st. "Only a week, doll."

"He's late!"

James looks up to Vi.

"Ha, hey, he's wondering why you're already yelling at him. Tell her you're only three hours old, James," I laugh.

He blinks and keeps looking at her. He loves her already. He already knows that's his mom.

Suddenly it was all worth it. The 1am trips to the deli for Vi's weird cravings, the mood swings, the panic, the money spent on the nursery, it was all worth it.

I have a family. I helped make this family, and I provide for it. They're mine. These are the people I'm meant to be with for the rest of my life. These are my people.

Is this what my parents felt like when they had me?

I think this is heaven. I can't wait to bring him home and put him in his crib and watch him sleep.

I'm a father.