Red vs blue season 2 (male oc x sister)

Rvb S2 E11 I dream of meanie

Blue base
The Blues and Jack are standing around each and the Tank.

Church: Get out of my host body right now, Tex!

Tex:(burrowing Lopez body) Your host body? This isn't your body, it's Lopez's body I'm just burrowing his body.

Church: Ok...but I'm using his body as my own so...GET OUT!

Tank: I am confused? I thought your name was Lopez? And I thought you were a fellow mech?(man).

O'mally: I know how to get her out of there(raise's his pistol at Tex).

All three:*Gotcha!*

Church: Caboose, don't look, just go explain to Tank, okay?(Caboose leaves) alright, Tex, now what's it gonna take to get you out of there?

Tex:(lie) Well ever since I've been a ghost, I've been watching you guys a lot.

Tucker:(interrupts) Whoa, when you say you're been watching us? Does that mean you've been us all the time?(he and Jack and Crystal and Tex look over at a rock that has been written on in aqua: PRIVATE! KEEP OUT! TUCKERS ROCK!) like even when we're alone?

Tex: Yes, Tucker, and you should be very ashamed of yourself.

Tucker:...It's very lonely out here...

Jack: Dude you just lowered the bar for all males everywhere.

Tex: Anyway, I've noticed a change in one of your guys...Caboose.

Church: A change? Like what? He's finally learned the whole alphabet?

Crystal: (inside Jack's helmet) Man Sarge doesn't all way's hate Simmons but this jackass is a jerk to our brother!

Jack:(whispers with his mic off) Ya I know but we have to wait and see what Tex's plan is.

Tex: You haven't noticed that he's become increasingly aggressive lately?

Sheila:(pops up) We have!(points at Tucker) started about the same time the Tank and you got blown up. We tried to tell Church but he never listens!

Church: Tucker,Sheila, there's a very fine line between not listening and not caring. I like to think that I walk that line every day of my life.

Jack:>Or being a lazy ass leader<.

Crystal:>agreed<.

Flashback

Tex:(voice over) I had just finished repairing the tank when I over heard Church's plan to warn the Reds about me.

Church:(flashback) I guess I'm gonna do the only thing I can do. I gotta warn the Reds.

Tex:(lie, voice over) From what I could tell, the A.I fragment calculated the odds of survival and didn't like the results. Once Caboose turn on his radio to call Church, it took its chance.

Caboose:(flashback) Calling Private Church,come in,Church.

End of flashback

Tucker: And that's when he said his name was O'mally so the A.I fragment that was in you infected Caboose?

Sheila: And Caboose decline me by not getting into his A.I slot.

Church: Right, everyone's armor has one slot for A.I and Caboose's would've been vacant do to the fact that Sheila's chip is in Tucker's helmet.

Tucker: I think there are a few of his NON-artificial slot's that are empty too.

Jack and Crystal glare at Tucker.

Tex: And before I could figure out what happened that dude in pink armor got a really lucky shot! And the next thing I know..(lie)I'm a ghost.

Church: Alright, I get it, Caboose has your precious little A.I fragment, so let me guess you're holding my host body hostage until I help you get your A.I fragment back, right?

Tex: Wrong you're gonna help me kill it.

Red base
Grif, Simmons, and Donut are lined up in front of Sarge and Allison.

Sarge: Men, it has come to our attention that we are in need of a new robot person, who wants to volunteer?

Donut: Are we going on a trip?! I love trips! Can we play I spy and license plate game's?

Simmons: Shut up, Donut!

Donut: Please!

Grif: Uh,sir-

Donut:-or punch buggy?!

Simmons: Why won't this guy shut up?

Grif: What exactly do you two mean by volunteer?

Allison: Quite obviously we are with out Lopez or Jack and Crystal (glares at Simmons direction) therefore, the only solution is turn on of you into a cyborg.

Simmons:(wide eyes) Have you two gone crazy?! What the actual hell!

Grif: Ok thats...that's just...I don't know what to say.

Donut: I vote for Grif!

Sarge: I'm told the cyborg operation is a relatively simple procedure really. Where the mostly useless guy's and slimy goo of the human body are replaced with the no doubt superior guy's and oily goo of a robot.

Grif: I'm confused.

Allison: If you're lucky, you may even get a copper rectum.

Grif: Wouldn't it be better if we didn't do this!

Allison: Good thinking Grif, but no I like the removing the guys thing so I think we stick with that.

Simmons: Yeah sir and mam, I hate to agree with this swine, but wouldn't it be better if we just got command to send us another perfectly good,brand new robot instead?

Sarge: Negative, meat sack. Another new robot could be reprogram by our enemies, so we need someone we know we can trust.(Sarge and Allison look at Grif).

Grif: Aw. FUCK ME!

Allison: Or someone whose mental capacity is so unbelievably tiny that he could never be turned against us.(looks at Simmons).

Everyone look's at Simmons.

Simmons: Hey I'm not dumb just very rich.

Sarge: Then again maybe we just stick with the trustworthy thing.

Grif: Auh, fuck.

Sarge: Now that's settled, Allison, I'll be in the medical ward of the base preparing the operation.

Allison: Alright, and I'll go and see how to do this operation.

Grif: How did you even get the rank of commander in the UNSC anyway?!

Allison: Just doing crazy ideas.