Loving Toby (Completed)

Epilogue

Where do we go when we go?

When life here on Earth ends, what happens next?

The thought kept on popping into her head as she moved mechanically along the crowd of people gathered inside Oakwood's Community Church. Funny how the same place where they exchanged vows a few weeks back would be the same place where she has to send him off to God knows where.

Luna felt numb, it's been three grueling days, yet her mind still refused to believe anything that happened. No one dared to speak to her, too scared of saying the wrong thing, but truth be told, nothing they said could make things right ever again.

"It's going to be okay honey," Tyra enveloped her in a bone-crushing hug, the guilt from being comforted by the woman who had lost another part of her family made her stomach drop but like the days that passed by ever so slowly, her lips refused to make a sound.

"You have to do it, he wanted you to, okay?" Tyra handed her a piece of old paper that she recognized in a heartbeat, her hand reaching for it, already knowing what was written inside. The rough texture and faint scent of books brought tons of memories that she wished to forget even for a split second.

"Babe, let's go," Athena guided her towards the altar, where Lexus and France stood with their white long sleeves and pleated jeans. Eyes hiding behind their dark sunglasses, like the rest of the crowd who had gathered inside the room.

The priest started the ceremony without waiting for anyone's approval, Luna stood alongside her friends, none of them was able to say a word of comfort, not that any of them needed it. They were there, all four of them watched everything that happened that night, and a part of them would always be back in that hellhole where the last of Toby's memory lingers.

Tyra stands in the front row, little Timmy holding his mother's hand. Like her, Timmy stopped crying the day after Toby's death. But unlike her, Timmy was a whole lot braver.  The child was the one who collected Toby's things when Tyra could barely find the will to move and send his son off. Dr. Morris alongside Toby's grandparents took the initiative to prepare everything for the funeral.

Everyone grieves differently, like how Lexus and France drowned themselves in alcohol until they were too drunk enough to forget, a momentary escape that will last for another night before the pain resurfaced stronger and greater for any of them to bear alone when morning came, or how Athena cried for days hoping her tears would be enough to cover her friends share, yet it still wasn't enough.

"Our dearest Toby joined our creat---" Luna tuned out the words in her head, wondering how the priest could say those words so easily when she could barely focus on anything other than the white casket staring back at her. Although she hadn't seen his body resting inside of the wooden box, Luna could picture his sleeping face just fine. She watched him for the last four years, every expression on his face, the slight crease on his forehead when he was deeply engrossed with the book that he was reading, the wrinkle on the side of his warm blue eyes so full of life when he smiled, his lips who breathe life to her very existence when it touches every part of her. And yet, the one that stuck on her head the most was the way he closed his eyes for the last time.

"It's time, Luna," Lexus voiced breaking into her internal turmoil, his arms holding her still, afraid that she would crumble right there and then. Gripping the already crumpled paper in her hand, Luna nodded with all her might. Lexus recognizing her resolve, guided her towards the podium where Toby's last word will be read by her.

"We're here, Luna, you're not alone. If it's too much for you, I'll do it instead," Luna wanted to give in to Lexus's words. She wanted to run away, surely, no one would hold it against her, yet she was well aware that Toby wouldn't like it. Toby was bad enough to trust her to do it, even after he left, he still torments her like no other.