8 Seconds // Mashton [DISCONTINUED]

Little Talks

Michael’s P.O.V

“No.” Ashton’s reply takes me by surprise and I stop dead in my tracks, staring at him. His expression softens a little and he takes a small step forward. “Michael I know you’re used to running whenever something you didn’t expect happens, but that’s not solving anything and besides, there’s nothing new and scary here.” I want to say something, want to tell him that there are new and scary things happening here, but I can’t find any words.

“I’m just gonna...leave you two alone.” Calum says, leaving my bed and quickly walking past Ashton out of the room, closing the door on his way.

“Michael, I’ve liked you, hell I’ve loved you, since before we came here, for almost two years now. The only thing that’s changed since then is that you’ve found out about it.” he pauses, running a hand through his hair. “Look, I’m not expecting you to like me back, I’m not expecting you to be cool with it, I’m really not expecting anything, I didn’t even mean to tell you but that happened and now this is happening. Just know that...know that I’m here, I’ll be here to cuddle or talk or anything you need me for and I’ll be jealous whenever you choose someone else over me, but I’ll be here.” I stay silent, still not knowing what to say. “now can you please remove this hairball from my foot before I do something I’ll regret.”

“of course.” I nod and walks over to him, quickly picking Zelda up before backing again, retaking my place next to the bed, this time with the kitten pressed to my chest. We stay like that for a few minutes, just staring at each other without any of us saying anything, before Ashton turns around to leave.

“Ashton.” he stops with his hand on the door handle, staying still with his back facing me. “it’s not that I...I don’t know I’m just scared. This is all so new to me and I still don’t know how to handle it and I just...I need time.”

“it’s okay, I understand.” and with that, he leaves. He leaves me alone, with a lump in my throat and more confused than ever.

~

“and then we have these absolutely beautiful forests, it's so green and then in the fall it turns all red and orange and yellow. I suppose it happens here too but it's not the same as back home." I nod, rolling over to my side to look at Katia. The two of us are laying on the floor behind the couch in Chloe's livingroom, talking and listening to the others laughing on the other side of the couch. Someone, I think it was either Chloe or Luke, came up with the brilliant idea that all six of us should get together and have dinner and just hang out and I was sceptic at first, I really was, but it turned out to be pretty fun and somehow, after we’d had dinner, Katia and I ended up here. “but the winter, oh the winter Michael you’d love it.” Katia smiles, her green eyes shining with happiness, and rolls over to her stomach. “there’s so much snow, so so much snow and when I was younger me and my friends would bury each other in the snow and build snowmen and we’d go skiing and I loved it so much.”

“when was the last time you went back there?” I ask her, because maybe I am a bit drunk and maybe the ceiling is moving a lot more than it should, but her voice is captivating and I’m paying full attention to her words.

“I haven’t been home since I was ten. My parents split up and my dad took me here. I haven’t seen my mum since either, she met someone else and she’s got a new family now, new kids.” she sighs and rests her head on her arms, still looking at me with those big eyes. IT makes me realise that if things had been different, if I hadn’t been gay and possibly already in love with someone, I probably would have fallen for her. She’s not like any of the other girls I met, she’s not even like Chloe. They’re both beautiful, sure, and none of them are wearing that extreme amount of makeup that a lot of girls nowaday does, but there’s something so….naked about Katia. Maybe it has to do with the fact that the first time I met her, she wasn’t hiding behind anything. She was sitting there, not afraid to let us see her scars, and there was nothing about her that was fake. I don’t know her as well as Chloe does, but I still feel like I understand what kind of person she is, and I love that.