The Demons In My Head

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Midnight Sky: The Demons In My Head

Midnight Sky: The Demons In My Head

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The pair Timberland boots struck the hardwood floor creating percussion sounds as Jungkook whirled through across the room, his eyes fixated at the reflection of him dancing in high tempo. His body flowed like a ripple from the ocean as his hair dances with it. He was one with music. The rhythm of the song coaxed his body to dance freely, with control and emotions.

He spun halfway, his heel preparing for a proper execution and as he gained the momentum, Jungkook ended the dance with a round-house kick. His sweats sprinkled at the floor like the dewfall, blossoming all the sweats and tears of each dreamer who had stood in that room because of their goals. The goal is like a cloud in the sky that is continuously moving. The runner keeps running forward, with it as the only thing in the eyes and in the mind.

No matter how small the progress is, as long as he keeps moving forward he will get there.

Exhaustion took over his body as he propped down on the floor. He can feel the world spinning and his hands were visibly shaking because of the amount of strength he exerted to properly dance the song. He threw his head back, panting that you can hear the sound through the whole room. Jungkook kept pushing himself to do harder choreographies in order to achieved the kind of control and smoothness that he desires.

When he was younger, he went to study B-boy then moved to hip-hop. He changed from one style to another because he wasn't becoming good. Whenever he watches the recorded videos of him dancing, he feels a pang of pain on his chest. No matter how many hours Jungkook would spend to practice, he never saw the results he desires. He knows that he just has to pursue it harder but sometimes it gets frustrating.

There are times when he feels like giving up. He is already nineteen years old and supposed to be a great dancer like those who started late compared to him. But he wasn't and he is getting tired. He is getting tired of trying so hard. When other people sleep, he practices. When they are in party and is in bliss, he practices. That's the disadvantage when you're not talented.

Jungkook always wishes that he was a prodigy.

A young star.

A phenom.

Someone so unquestionably gifted that they were destined for greatness from birth. A once in a lifetime kind of talent. Unfortunately, he wasn't. He is just a journeyman, a grinder. Someone who is constantly overlooked, tossed aside and written off. A person who saw everything he built with diligence, fall apart and get suffocated from the whispers of those demons creeping inside his head.

Jungkook have always wanted to run away; run away to a place where no one knows him. He wants to drive to god-knows where and be lost. As sweats trickled down to his jaw, Jungkook felt his chest ached and he couldn't breathe. His eyelids felt heavy as the memories of his failures and hardships propelled through his fragile mind. His lungs burned from taking too much from his mundane life. 

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