"Once we learn that pain will always be around,
We finally learn to find peace within ourselves."
I walked down a dark narrow street, with only a few street lights to keep me from getting lost. The night sky filled with stars and a full moon, keeping me calm as the slight cold wind hit my chest.
Up ahead was the abandoned lighthouse right on the edge of a coastal cliff. Beneath its balcony is water that is deep enough to jump into. I walked up the stairs, all the way to the top. I walked to the edge of the balcony, which had broken barriers, and walked onto the plank. I wanted to jump and feel the cold water run through me and give me shivers.
I wanted to be free of all the pain and the loss but I knew that this was not the way. I look down to the rocks where my friends would be sitting. Four beautiful souls that no one can replace. Evan, the sly, cocky yet quiet boy. Violet, the happy one, full of dopamine. Ivy, the mischievous yet a determined honest leader. Lastly, Lester, the loud and obnoxious one that keeps us together. All gone, taken too early.
Finding myself was the hardest part, in fact, I don't believe I actually found myself but rather, come to terms with my past. Losing them in such a short period caused me to lose parts of me that was connected to them. They were my everything.
I suffered for three long years trying to forget, deny, understand and even live with what happened. I lost myself in the process and forgot who I was. But now, with the help of therapy, I've finally figured that it was time to find myself.
It's not going to be easy, I only know a little but a start is a start. I breathed in the cold sea air and watched the waves hit the cliffs. I smiled and walked back down the light house and continued my walk onto the street.
If there is one thing that I know, it's that in my lonely moments, I say to Evan, Violet, Ivy and Lester, wherever you are, thank you.
THE END
YOU ARE READING
The Untold Chronicles of Liliana Lawton
General FictionLiliana Lawton is a young female adult trying to discover who she is and who she was. Embark on her journey through her memories via her written entries where she describes dark, disturbing imagery and loving beautiful moments of her life. WARNING:...
