hopeful

help with revision

* Beatrice PoV*

mimi let me in the house for the second time that day . she handed me a tea which warmed up both my  cold hands and shouted for john " john your sister is here to help with some revising " there was a loud groan and stomping down the stairs as he turned and said somewhat bitterly " hey sis want to do it upstairs so mimi can read in silence " i just nod and pick up the pile of books wondering if i should be afraid of him or not.

i headed up to his room as he closed the door and immediately said a mixture of scolding me in a harsh tone almost screaming as his voice was raised and annoyance riddled in the question as I stepped backwards to the door cowering at his tone " why would i be doing revision let alone with you ." i looked down and said with lots of sniffling in between as tears welled as he practically yelled at me

"i thought i might as well give you some notes since i am going to be in the same history and geography test with you next thursday and i just want you to do decently unlike me getting full marks which is sometimes annoying , sorry then I'll just go home then  if you don't want me over here , my bad , sorry " and I turned on my heel  as I went to grab the door knob

he chuckled softly and pulled me to sit next to him  " i don't care about your grades sis but i want to know you a lot more because you are my sister and i barely know you since you stayed with mum. you mean a lot to me already but i do want to have a better bond between us , i am sorry i scolded you I shouldn't have done that bea" a few tears fell and he whipped them away "it's ok johnny I know you didn't mean to , am I staying then" in response I got a simple nod and smile

after a long few hours i handed him a spare set of the notes i had written and gave them to him . i know he wouldn't be bothered in writing and revising but it was worth a try .

i sat with mimi for a while as we talked about school and boys but when she asked " do you have a boyfriend " i shook my head and stated that no one would like me like me since i was the quite girl in the back of the class . And people pity dated me or as a way to get to Johnny stating that i didn't like people using me whether its to get to my friend or to johnny.

after that i left for home since it was getting dark . as soon as i arrived i slumped into my bed and changed into pyjamas before brushing my teeth and falling asleep . but not for long

it was peaceful and calming until about two o'clock when bobby got up and so did mum , they talked downstairs then giggling and chuckling as they then came up . bobby went to the toilet as i went and got a glass of water from downstairs since i woke getting thirsty.

when i came back upstairs i lay down and tried to get some more sleep but as soon as i was drifting i heard their bed slamming against the wall harder and faster . Then came the moans and groans which was soon accompanied by the slamming of the bed frame on the wall . God sakes I just want to sleep . Why do my ears have to be cursed with these horrific sounds , my not exactly innocent ears now scarred at the things the two adults were doing

"uuuuuhhm bobby " " ugggh yes there right there" "uuhhhmm harder yes " " BOBBY" "UGHHHHHH" " FUCK BOBBY HARDER "  my mum moaned and screamed

they were dreadful and i didn't want to hear it . eventually the two adults stopped having sex which took about an hour which during that time i zoned out well tried to zone out and revised a bit .

but since i was up really early i polished my school shoes since i was bored . by the time that five am hit i left my room and got an extra long shower before changing into my school pants that were clean whilst the skirts dried off .

i made normal breakfast and was appalled by the fact when i knocked on mums door she let out a moan and giggle, great . Not . i knocked once more and entered when i was allowed by a shout of enter . i placed the tray at the foot of the bed and hurriedly left .