The Space Between Us | L.S

Parallel

I think what I hate most about Louis is that no one can compare to him.

Before I could finish my sentence, he had slammed his lips to mine and nearly knocked all wind from my lungs. I hardly had a moment to react before he pressed his tongue to the seam of my lips and, at my grant of access, delved inside my mouth.

Just like so many times prior, his kiss obliterated every thought. For the first time in forever my mind was locked into the present. The worries of the day evaporated like a summer shower onto a hot car. Drunk on endorphins my only desire was to touch him.

Jesus Christ. How was I ever to move on from this man?

His hand softly moved up from my hip and grasped lightly at my throat, putting light pressure on it. He tilted my head up slightly, and I let out the faintest mewl as his lips left mine and he left a hungry, wet kiss on the side of my jaw. Warmth radiates from the spot where his lips just touch my skin, slowly spreading through the rest of me. His needy lips trail up, halting just under my ear, somewhere he fucking knows is my weak spot. My knees almost buckle under me as his lips hum softly against the sensitive skin.

"Louis." I breathe out without my consent.

"Let go baby." He says softly, his lips trailing back down to his hand that was still controlling my moments. His lips find mine again and I let his tongue push past my teeth, wresting against mine. Before I could fully immerse myself into him; he stopped. He let go of my throat and leaned his forehead against mine.

"I gotta stop." He said harshly, attempting to catch his breath. "'ll never stop if I don't now."

I nod confused, my movements making both of our heads bob slightly. I give myself a few moments to calm myself before I speak again.

"So mates?" I quietly asked, a smile creeping onto my face.

He drove me home straight after; he knew as well as I did, if we stayed in the same room for much longer – we'd both do something we might regret. I wasn't quite sure what this meant for us now. Would we actually be friends?

That kiss told me everything I need to know about our current feelings. We still wanted each other badly but as much as I wanted to forgive and forget; there was still the part of me that couldn't. Would it be so easy to just forget everything and trust him once again? I used to trust Louis with my whole heart, there wasn't an ounce of doubt in me about him. Now I wasn't too sure.

I wasn't even sure if us getting back together was on the table. Maybe he was just looking for us to fuck again and even then, did I want to have anything with him again? I could just blame the kiss on a blip of judgement and move on from it.

"You back together with him?" Jonas asks as soon as I walk through the door.

"I'm not in the mood Jonas." I say throwing my bag onto the couch. "Wait...how did you know I was with him?"

"I may or may not have looked at Find my Friends, also you have that stupid smile on your face that only he gives you." His face scrunched up in disgust. I walked past him towards the kitchen, keying in to his feet doing a 180 to follow me. 

"You don't have to play this charade anymore, Louis and I are..." I searched for the word that would best describe this predicament we were in. "civil. We are fine now, friends even." A tiny smile formed at our 'friendship'. I pulled the refrigerator door, leaning down to look at our slim selection of edible food. 

"Friends with benefits?" 

"No!" I groaned, checking the date of the lone cheese stick that was wedged between our eggs and Jonas' leftover green smoothie. 

"Minus the friends." He snipped coyly, I looked over my shoulder eyeballing his leaned back stance occupying the counter. 

Shutting the door a bit too harshly, I flinched at the sound of the milk clashing against its plastic cage. "Minus the anything! We're not hooking up." 

"Hm? Then what were you two doing?" My mind briefly takes me back to the sensation of his hand around my throat. "Talking, we grabbed a cup at Chaps and talked about us. We went back to his place because it was loud at the diner and we were having a meaningful conversation about us. I think I am finally get closure."

"You're getting something alright." He half-smirked, folding his arms over his chest. 

"Very mature. Louis and I are working it all out. So you don't need to be the friend who talks shit about him with me anymore; I thank you. It really helped me through the break-up but I am moving past that."

"I just don't want to see you get hurt again. The last time you said you two were fine, you came into the flat having a breakdown. I've never seen you like that before." A chill runs up my back at the thought of the night I found out about Rhiannon. I completely lost it on the walk home and scared the living shit out of Jonas and Will, who were in their own predicament on the sofa.

"It's not like that, I'm not getting myself caught up. This is only for closure." I told him, and if only I believed it myself.