Recovering McKenzy

Chapter 5

Shawn:

         How do you get something that you want so bad, but can't have? That's what I keep asking myself. Me and Ken have known each other for years and we had started dating 2 years ago. I guess I fucked that relationship up, but honestly I don't care. After waiting so long to even get a date with her and then after being the best guy I could possibly be and she still was claiming to not be ready. Dealing with her dumb ass parents, who I peeped didn't like me no matter what I did to make her happy. I know I fucked up and probably ruined her life, but she'll get over it eventually. I was just sick of feeling like I was wasting my time with a girl that I felt like didn't even trust me which I guess I could understand because I wasn't faithful within the last month of our relationship. I was cheating with my ex Chelsea and I told her from the go it was nothing but sex and she was cool with it. Me and Chelsea were good together but I just felt like we were best as friends instead of in a relationship. Ken was everything I wanted in a girl smart, funny, beautiful, sexy in her own way, had just right amount of attitude whenever it was needed, amibitous, and didn't take shit from nobody. I really loved her and couldn't see myself with anybody else. She was my girl. I heard from people that she had been hanging with that new nigga Kendrick and I ain't like him. Partly because I was jealous and didn't want her with nobody. I just hadn't expected her to move on that fast which wasn't even like her. She liked taking her time with everything and never rushed. So to see the changes she had made over the months was surprising to me. When I saw them together in the mall I was heated and couldn't believe my eyes. I had to control my anger because I was definitely making a scene but I didn't care. I was honestly hurt to see her because she looked genuinely happy with him. She was happy with me, but you could never really see it in her eyes. Anybody could see she was happy with him, just by looking in her eyes and not even smiling. They do say eyes are the gateway to the soul and seeing her I believed it. I don't know what it was about him. He could never compare to me. But it was bugging me because I knew it was going to be a challenge trying to get her back with him around. But I wasn't giving up without a fight.

        McKenzy:

                 The incident in the mall yesterday really had me embarrassed and scared. Shawn had never been violent or a person to cause scene so when he grabbed me and said those things I was surprised. But Kendrick was there by my side and reassured me that nothing would happen. I was still shaken up and afraid that Shawn would come and try to hurt me. Having Kendrick there was something special to me we had gotten so close over the weeks and now that we were taking things slow with a relationship I was more than happy and excited. He was a great guy and I knew he would do anything to protect me. I just had a feeling that conflict was bound to happen between him and Shawn. Shawn was definitely the jealous type and Kendrick just didn't like him for obvious reasons. I knew that Shawn wouldn't give up without a fight and Kendrick wasn't going to back down if the opportunity came. At this point, I was just stressed and trying to move on and find peace within my life away from Shawn. It seemed so tough to do because no matter what happened Shawn always seemed to inch his way back into my life whether it was phone calls or showing up at my job. I just wanted to disappear and start over. But Kendrick being the sweetheart that he is always knew what to say or do to keep my smiling and laughing. With him by my side and there whenever I needed him, those days where I felt like the dark clouds were never going to go away and I was slipping into depression, he was there to pick me up.

School was going cool pretty much the same as always. Me and Jace had been so busy with our personal lives that the only time we really talked was at school. I missed my best friend and we needed some girl time ASAP. I had been laying in bed staring at my ceiling when my phone rung. School had been canceled this morning from the heating system being broken so we had a free day. I leaned over grabbing my phone from my side table and looking at Kendrick's picture flashing across the screen. I answered on the 5th ring.