Redeeming the Darkness

Chapter Twenty-Five - Ivy

When we walked into the house, Sandro immediately went up to his apartment and we were left alone. My body had stopped shaking sometime between his parent's house and ours. I knew if I could just get Zane home, I could protect him from everything and I guess at that moment, he was feeling the same way.

He walked to the fridge and put some ice in a baggie, wrapped it in a towel, and took my hand. We walked up to our bedroom and he picked me up and placed me on the bed before kissing my forehead.

"I'm going to go get a shower, okay?" he asked.

"Okay," I answered. He placed the ice on my hip and then walked into the bathroom. I waited a while before following him in and sitting on the closed toilet lid. He peeked his head around the curtain and gave me a questioning look. "I couldn't be away from you." I explained.

He closed the curtain and finished showering while I sat there. A few minutes later I lowered my eyes as he stepped out and dried off. After wrapping his towel around him, he grabbed my hand and pulled me into the bedroom again, placing me right back on the bed. He sat beside me, and I tried to make eye contact, but felt emotions I'd been holding in bubble to the surface. I wasn't sure I'd be able to speak without crying.

"Yesterday you asked me if I was in love with you," Zane's voice cut into the silence and my heart hurt, not wanting to hear that he didn't love me all over again. "I think I might have lied."

"You might have lied?" I asked, extremely thrown off.

"When I was growing up, my dad would go on these drinking binges. It only happened every now and then, but he'd just drink for days and days. My first memory of my mom getting hit was when I was about four years old. I was only a kid and I couldn't do anything about it. Then Emma was born, and I got older. Mom would lock us in my room when she knew Dad was coming home from wherever he spent his days drinking, then we'd hear the fighting. I never heard my mom talk back or even try to defend herself, it was just him screaming about things that didn't make sense to me at the time. Money, stress, and so on. Then one day, when I was thirteen, I couldn't take it anymore. I broke my door and charged out into the living room and plowed into my dad. My mom screamed for me to get away but I fought him with all the strength I had. I wasn't as tough as I thought and he landed a pretty good hit to my head."

I was breathing hard and trying to ignore the tears running down my cheeks. Zane scooted closer and wiped my face with his hands. "Don't cry for me, baby. It's okay."

I shook my head, still unable to speak. I wanted him to keep talking, I needed him to know I was here for him so I grabbed his hands and remained silent.

"I started noticing it didn't matter who my dad hit, as long as he got the upper hand on someone, he'd eventually come back out of his haze and be normal for a while. The decent times in between, and the fact that I didn't see my mom black and blue for a while, was worth it to me. If I could go back, I would do it all over again." His eyes moved to the window where a light rain had started to fall. "One day my mom told me that no one had ever stood up for her since she was in high school. She was picked on because she was a heavier kid, and I guess she didn't have many friends because she was so shy. My dad noticed her though and thought she was pretty. He liked her and she eventually fell for him, got pregnant at sixteen and then her parents made her marry him. She didn't care because she loved him, but after two years of marriage, he got fired from his first job for showing up late. I was sick or something and they weren't getting any sleep so he didn't wake up on time. He got fired and he felt like a failure, so he turned to the only thing he knew. His dad was an alcoholic."

I sucked in a shaky breath. "It wasn't your fault."

"I know that," he smiled sadly. "Neither of them have ever blamed me but when my mom told me that story, I felt like the least I could do was protect her. Ivy, my dad isn't a bad person. There are days I can't think about him because it hurts so much. I wish he would open his eyes and see that we love him even though he hurts us. I wish our love was enough to bring him out of this addiction, I guess."

I watched a tear fall from the corner of his eye and felt my heart break again.

"When my movie made it big, I was shocked and excited. I had more money than I ever thought possible, so after paying off my mom's house, I went wild. I tried losing myself and tried forgetting the pain I had. Little did I know, the path I chose was causing more pain. I ended up addicted to drugs and the entire time I was away; my dad was hitting my mom again. I abandoned her and she was hurting because of me. I should have stayed around and protected her."

"Zane." My voice broke. "Why didn't you ever call the police?"

"We did once, before I was old enough to help my mom, I called the police, and they came over. My dad's uncle was a cop, though, so nothing happened. They told my dad to calm down and they left us. He was so angry after that. I decided to never ask for help again."

I got up on my knees and wrapped my arms around his neck. I couldn't hold it in anymore, I let go and cried. I cried because no one had stepped in and helped his family. I was proud that Zane had stood up for the woman that he loved with all his heart. I could not understand why she let her young son stand up to his father the way she did, but I loved Zane for doing it. His arms wound around my back, pulling me even closer.

We sat like that for a while until I finally pulled away. Sitting on my feet brought me eye to eye with Zane and I saw the wetness on his cheeks. Like he'd done for me, I wiped his tears away with my hands and softly kissed his lips.

"I don't expect you to say anything, but I need you to know that I love you, Zane." I whispered. I feared his rejection, but I couldn't allow my fear to keep him from knowing. He needed someone to openly love him and I could do that. I wanted to do that. "I'm not exactly sure when it happened, and I'm so sorry I'm breaking the rules here. I just want you to know that you have one person in this world that loves you enough to stand in front of danger for you. I'd do it a million times if I had to."

Zane lifted his hand and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and smiled.

"That's the thing, Ivy. I don't think I understood what I felt for you until you jumped on top of me, protecting me with your body." He paused, putting his hands around my waist, he pulled me until I was on his lap. "I chose to stand between my dad and my mom, but no one has ever chosen to stand between him and I. No one until you, but then he hurt you and I couldn't see past the rage I felt. I didn't understand it. I felt angry when he hurt my mom but something inside me snapped when I heard you cry out. I felt like there was nothing on this earth that would stop me from killing him for touching what was mine. For hurting my wife. The wife that, somewhere along the way, I grew to love."

My eyes widened at his admission. "You love me?" I asked.

"I love you," he answered with a smile.

"What about our contract?"

"We don't have to worry about that right now," he said. I wish I could say it didn't hurt, but it did. I wanted him to say that he didn't care about the contract and that he wanted me to stay, but I guess I could take things one day at a time. All I knew was that I loved him and he loved me. I smiled.

"I want to be your wife, now, Zane." I said, hoping he'd understand what I was saying. His eyes told me he knew exactly what I meant and he leaned in, not questioning my decision to be with him.

This kiss was my favorite. It was filled with love and heat and everything I knew I wanted to share with my husband.

His lips moved across my cheek and stopped when he got to my ear. "I never knew love could feel like this," he whispered before moving us to the center of the bed.