Rivalry

miracle

being pregnant was a struggle for me but when it came time for labor i didnt realize it would bring back old trauma from when i gave birth to royal.i was having a panic attack while giving birth which made them give me an emergency c-section. which sent my nerves into overdrive and made my body go into shock it was like the whole experience all over again. and i just wanted it to end that is all.

3 months later...

i patted me and dave daughter zuri back trying to get her to hush so i could get at least some sleep but it seemed as if that wasnt happening anytime soon. i was exhausted and needed a huge break and just wanted to cry with her dave was barley here to help with anything royal was all the way on the other side of the house along with alina which left me by myself.

"zuri please just go to sleep for mommy," i sniffed but she just cried and screamed more i had fed her changed her diaper sung to her bounced her made silly faces everything anyone could think of. tears began to swell up in my eyes thinking about this i didnt have to deal with this with royal i had such a big support system but now it was just me which made me even more sadder. dave was always working he hasnt spent more than 24hrs with zuri i felt tears drop from my eyes because i was really overwhelmed and didnt have anyone to lean on tay and dino was gone i couldnt call them i didnt have friends because i feared that i would loose them. i began to sob even harder it was already bad enough i had to endure giving the most traumatic birth on earth all over again but i had to do it alone because dave was out of town and his flight had gotten delayed for some odd reason so i was just trying to go through the ropes of everything.

just as i had started to cry with zuri dave burst in the room looking all happy but once he had seen me on the floor crying along with the baby he stripped out of his clothes grabbing the baby out of my hands trying to get her to stop crying i drug myself into the bathroom. i looked a mess hair everywhere eyes had bags under them i just looked exactly how i felt i just wanted this pain to end i locked the bathroom door crying over the sink i didnt know what to do and why i decided to have another baby this was so tough for me to deal with.

"baby you okay in there" dave knocked on the door

"yes ill be right out baby," i yelled out through the door. i tried to fix my face before i had to face him because i didnt want to tell him about all of my problems with dealing with the baby i didnt want to think i couldnt handle it like i was with royal

"are you okay baby," he questioned looking at me i nodded with my head hung low so he couldnt see my eyes

"of course im just tired that is all,"

"you know i could always hire a nanny right i know the new baby can be hard and that you are ready to get back to work," he smiled

"you think we need a nanny i can handle my child dave,"

"not by how you have been acting i know i barely be around these days to help out and it is alot on you since you dont have the support you did at first with royal i just think you need a helping hand since im not here,

"how about you start being here maybe that will help me," i mumbled turning my back to him

"i know baby but i cant right now im trying to set my family up for the rest of their life," he told me

"you have already done that dave what about me i need you here," i snapped

"this isnt an argument miracle im going to hire a nanny and that is final,"

"while your at it can you hire me a new husband too one that makes time for his family and dont take last minute business trip when he has a pregnant wife at home that was due any moment.... and then doesnt even make it to be by his wife side when she is in the second worst labor of her life can you do that for me now that you are trying to make sure your family is straight for life." i snapped grabbing my cover and leaving out of the room so maybe tonight i could actually sleep.

next morning,

i woke up fixing the kids food for breakfast as usual alina and royal came down pushing and playing as usual i was happy they got along so well which wasnt much of a shock when they grew up together.

"ma this bacon is fireeeee," royal laughed taking two more pieces

"so where is zuri she is usually on your hip,"alina asked

"she is upstairs with dave," i shrugged

"whhaatttt he actually paid attention to his new born for the first time in three months shocking,"alina replied sarcastically

"yeah man dad works so much i forget he even stays here," royal followed up with

"yeah well ive been having trouble dealing with the baby by myself so he thinks we should get her a nanny,"

"or he could just take off work and be here for you," alina snapped

"facts!!"

"yeah but that man loves his job,"

"or maybe he loves someone else at his job who knows,"

"naw pop wouldnt cheat,"

"i mean didnt he cheat on his last wife with auntie...and that is how you got here royal im just saying no job would make me get on a last minute flight and completely miss the birth of my own child unless he was tied up with something more than work," alina shrugged

"okay young lady watch you damn mouth in my house," dave snapped at her

"i heard the truth hurts you know.... it is good to see you holding your own child for once," she snapped getting up hugging me before giving the baby a kiss and walking out the door

"alright ma ill see you after practice...," royal stated while giving me and the baby a kiss before walking out of the door behind alina.

"so thats how the kids really feel," he asked

"dont you have work," i snapped grabbing the baby out of his hands and leaving him standing there to think why his family wasnt so fund of him at the moment.