Dragon Age: One Shots

Zevran Arainai x Cyrsas Mahariel- He was all that mattered

He only knew he was moving by the number of each footprint as he strode forward, fossilized in the blood and stone. All he could feel was him, his presence, his heavy breaths, and his pain. He was all that mattered.

They had lied; they promised they would never feel this way; they would never get too close. It would only hurt him. It would only make it more difficult.

And yet here he was, ready to storm the dark city itself if it meant he could be by his side, and Cyrsas never doubted it.

It was time, he became aware of his aching body, the rocks pressed into his heels, and the pounding of his heart. As quickly as he could snap his fingers, he felt his world cave in, surrounding him in nothing but painful and numbing memories, the ones he had helped him conceal. Knowing or not, he was Zevran's light in the darkness. He noticed his lips desperately pressed against his. He could feel the nervousness spilling from his body in a series of tremors. His lips no longer tasted of honeysuckle, his senses only perceived his agony. He was all that mattered.

His tears didn't fall to express his own exhaustion. He cried because he knew that he only had one option, and it would hurt the person he swore to protect. But it did make sense in his head: he had failed to protect Tamlen, and history was bound to repeat itself.

"In death, sacrifice." His fingers swirled across his cheek, looking for a scar to trace, settling on the tattoo and memorizing it so that he would never forget, not even in his next coming adventure. His warmth was his favorite feeling. And then it was gone.

The darkness embraced him. It was so quick that he didn't understand what had happened, but when he heard the deep cry of anguish from the red- bearded dwarf, he had it figured out. He clung firmly to his consciousness and sat up, finally feeling the sore on his head that the warden had just placed there, but he knew it was the right choice, the good choice. If only he had been a coward, unphased by the end of this world, unphased by the child at Lothering, unphased by the crying woman, the one who had lost everything, he might have him in his arms. He was all that mattered.

His motive was not so pure, not so moral, but the dalish would not be alive to confess it.

He saw his elegant figure standing strong above the monster that he feared beyond comprehension. He was the fiercest warrior he knew, he could only be killed if it was his will, and it was. He was not only robbing himself of a future, he was robbing Zevran of his. Next he saw his eye. He saw his beautiful green eye and the tears swelling in it, the churn of color he got lost in. He sensed the silent 'sorry' spilling from his lips.

"I'm coming, Tamlen."

And then the sword came down. He was all that mattered, and now nothing mattered at all.

He was never scared of death, perhaps that was his downfall. The only feeling that twinged his love for survival was the fear that he would hurt his friends, his loved ones, Zevran. Those friends that he was not deserving of.

All Zevran felt was the clasp of his heart and an indescribable pain, the ache of emptiness that could never be eased. He knew nothing would ever fill the gaping wound in his heart. He was all that mattered, and now he was gone.