I'm Not Gay

9

I'm not sure if it makes sense, but I'm looking for it to be about 2-3 months that Alec and Magnus have been together at this point. Please comment if that doesn't feel right to any of you with the timeline I have, because then I'm going to go back and revise when I get time.

"What the hell am I going to do? I'm finally happy, being with Magnus, and she's going to come home and mess everything up!" Alec could feel the panic rising in him.

"Woah, woah, Alec, relax, we'll figure something out okay?" Izzy said, putting her hands on Alec's shoulders. 

"You don't get it Izzy. She can't accept the fact I'm gay. There is absolutely no way. I've spent my whole life now trying to undo the things she did to my head." Tears welled in Alec's eyes. Jace and Izzy both put their arms around him in a group hug. 

*****

Alec trained for a few hours to get his mind off his current situation, then he texted Magnus. 

A: I have bad news.  My mom is coming home...

M: Alexander, don't let her get to you. Do you need me to stay away for while, to avoid having an argument until she's gone?

A: I think that would be best. Ughh... I'm going to miss you though.

M: Come over tonight, and maybe I can sneak into your room at night when she's over?

A: I would love that. Talk to you tonight.

Alec put his phone away and looked at Jace and Izzy. "Guys... do you think it's too early to know if I'm in love with Magnus?" 

"Depends," Jace said, "Are you in love with Magnus?" 

Alec bit his lip, "I think so? I don't know. When I'm with him, everything feels different. It's a feeling I've never felt before. I feel like I almost can't live without him, and I have no idea what I would do if I didn't have him in my life."

"Look, if you think you're in love with Magnus, then talk to him. I'm sure he feels the same way."

"Jace, how can you be sure if I'm not even sure?" 

"Because you don't see the way you two look at each other, but I do. Magnus looks at you, and I can see that he has love in his eyes. Just tell him Alec. You won't regret it."

Later that night, Alec left the institute for what he hoped wasn't the last time. 

"Hey," Magnus said with a furrowed brow when he opened the door and saw the worry on Alec's face. "Are you okay?"

Alec just wrapped his arms around Magnus, "I love you," he whispered. "I love you and I don't want to lose you."

Magnus was surprised and pushed Alec back, only slightly, just enough to look at his face. "Alexander, you love me?"

Panic suddenly came over Alec, "Well, I mean, I -- You don't think it's too soon right?" he stammered.

Magnus laughed and pulled Alec back into a hug, "No, no I don't. I love you too. I was just surprised you said it first. Usually I'm the one who says it first."

Eventually they let go of each other and Magnus took Alec by the hand to sit on the couch. 

"What is all this about, really?" Magnus asked. "Are you worried that your mom is coming home?"

"You don't understand Maryse Lightwood, Magnus. She refuses to believe I'm gay and she's against downworlders."

"How ironic that both of her children are dating downworlders," Magnus smirked.

"She's also a very powerful woman who would stop at nothing to make sure her children are living what she thinks are good lives."

"I'm guessing that doesn't include her daughter being with a fey and her son being with a male warlock?"

"Yep," Alec said. "I just feel like she's going to try and tear us apart if she finds out."

Magnus scooted closer to Alec and put his head on Alec's shoulder, "Okay, then as much as it pains me, I will try my best to stay away from you while she's home. But Alexander, you do realise you can't hide from her forever, though, right?"

"I know, but I just want to hide for now, okay?" 

"That's okay! I'm willing to wait as long as you need." 

Alec took a sigh of relief, "Thank you for understanding." He kissed Magnus' forehead.

Magnus snuggled closer to Alec, putting his arm around Alec's waist. 

"I'm going to miss you," Magnus breathed against Alec's neck. "I'm going to miss this."

Alec turned toward Magnus, "I'm going to miss you too," his lips nearly touching Magnus'. 

Magnus smiled, "When is your mom coming?" 

"She didn't say. It could be any day now." 

Magnus pouted and pulled Alec even closer, until they were practically on top of each other. He didn't say anything, just held Alec close.