.•°¤* ꜱᴛᴏᴘ ᴀᴄᴛɪɴɢ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ *¤°•.

~17~

// tw // mentions of homophobia

“Come here often?” Dream started. I wanted to laugh, I wanted to laugh so bad that it hurt when I resisted that ball in my throat from coming up. The witty grin on his lips faded the second my lips began to quiver and my breathing became a bit more strained. Crying seemed like the best thing to do at that moment. It had been something I hadn’t stopped doing for days now, so I didn’t see a reason to stop. I tried to ignore the feeling but it was already too late. The salty streams were racing down my cheeks and joining under my chin by the time I attempted to whimper out his name in the pathetic excuse of a greeting.

Immediately, I was engulfed in a familiar warmth and comfort of two arms securing themselves around the small of my back. I had barely enough time to register the faint smell of cologne before I was sobbing into his hoodie and clawing at the material. My entire body shuddered in Dream’s hold; so comforting and warm and amazing. It felt like home. He felt like home. I wanted to cry even harder at that thought, as if I wasn’t already wailing. I swore I heard him sniffle and choke down a few sobs if it weren’t for the sound of my beating heart in my ears blocking everything else out. 

The sweet nothings whispered into my ear slowly made me relax, made my shoulders drop and my breathing even out. I loosened my grip on his hoodie but didn’t dare pull my face away. Dream didn’t move either, he continued tracing circles into my back with one hand and tangling his fingers in my hair with the other. It felt so nice to be in his loving arms, like an angel sent by god himself to flick that halo above my head and kiss the tears away from my eyelashes. I couldn’t even tell if we were still on earth. The hug was just so otherworldly, strange and new, heavenly even. I never wanted to let go, he may disappear and never return if I let go. 

“I’m here. I’m here, George.”

That just about made me start crying again but a lot more violently. The idea was tempting, but I still pushed myself away from him and wiped my eyes for the millionth time today. A veil of silence layered itself over our short, cold breaths and awkward chuckles of post-break down behavior. I didn’t want to talk to him while I was so worked up but I couldn’t help it. Being in his arms made some type of vessel pop inside of me, but leaving them seemed so much worse, fatal even, like a lifeline. Never in the few months of knowing Dream had I wanted to hug him more than today, right now. 

“Are you ready to talk?” His voice. God. It was so tender and smooth and somehow so goddamn emotional.

“Yes,” I said and decided to ignore the break in the vowel. 

We settled down on a bench that faced the lake of ice. It wasn’t as dark as before, but the nighttime sensitive lights were still on despite the sun slowly rising over the horizon behind us. More birds had come out of their hiding spots to join in on early morning singing, happily searching for worms. The park was so much more pleasant during this time of the day where no one was around other than the animals. It was too cold for anyone to even think of taking a nice jog before sunrise which only further convinced me to come back here at this time when I wasn’t wrapped up in some teen drama.  

“I want to apologize, George. There’s so much I should be apologizing for and I think you already know what I’m talking about. I wanna say sorry for everything. I had no place in dragging you into my life and putting you in uncomfortable situations just because I wanted you there. I shouldn’t have been so stupid because I knew what I was doing to you, but I just didn’t know how I could fix things with Stacy being there. I never wanted to hurt you, but everything I did hurt you, I knew it did and all I did was stay quiet and let you keep falling down into a deeper hole. I’m so sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I never wanted anything like that to happen to you.”