Finding my Happiness

Layers

7:30 P.M blinks on my alarm clock. I'm laying in bed staring at the ceiling searching for anything to make me feel better. I haven't been down stairs for hours and I'm pretty sure the guys down there have had dinner already cause I heard a fuss that James and Prince were burning the food again. I wanted to bring myself down there to the kitchen but I just wanted to be left alone to my thoughts. Part of me wants to know why Reggie has such a hold on me? And why are these painful memories just coming back to me? As I'm in my own world, I feel my phone vibrate on my night table. I say a silent prayer that it isn't that nigga calling me again. I flip it over and see my girl Cassandra's name pop up. It's a relief that it's not Reggie but I'm also not in the mood to talk to her either. But I know if I don't answer, she's gonna bring her ass here to the house and I don't have time to explain why I have Michael Jackson impersonators in my house. I pick up my phone and answer.
" Hey Cass." I say lowly.
" Hey girl! What's up with your voice?" She asks back.
" Nothing I was just taking a nap that's all." I say sitting up in the bed pushing my curly hair to the back.
"You was taking a nap 7 at night? Be real Jazzy what's going on?" I can just feel her rolling her eyes at me.
" Girl it's nothing, ok? I just been tired lately that's all."
" If you say so. Anyways! I was calling you to see how you feel about going to the block party this Saturday? I heard it's gonna be lit as fuck honey!"

I groan mentally at the thought of even going to the party. Every year, Four blocks down our street is the Annual Neighborhood Block Party. I remember since I was a kid, I went every year. They had fun activities like Bounce houses, tractor rides, a petting zoo... you name it they had it. The atmosphere was just so amazing with the live bands playing, and the food would just make your stomach rumble on sight. As I grew up I kind of only went to the block party's cause my friends wanted to go and meet boys and shit. And honestly that's how me and.... Reggie met.

" Hell no Cassandra I'm not going." I say shaking my head.
" Why not?! We go every year!"
" Because believe it or not, this hasn't been my year."
" So you just gonna mope around in that house all by yourself?" She asks. I wanted to laugh at her cause I'm not in the house by myself, it's kind of been taken over.
" Yes that's exactly what I'm going to do. It was fun over the years to go but this year I'm staying home."
" You know damn well your Grandma wouldn't want you to just stay home. Besides it's not good for you to just dwell in sadness all day." I hear her opening a bag of chips and smacking on them.

" Well I would rather do that all day then be at that damn block party."
" You used to love going Jazz! What's the real reason besides your grandma and dad being gone?"

" Cass don't go there with me please. I'm not in the mood to slap you over the phone especially when I have to see you tomorrow."

" Ok I'll let it go. I love you girl, I just don't want your emotions eating you alive in there."

" I'm fine I promise."

"Ok. Anyways I'll see you tomorrow morning right?"

" What choice do I have?" I say dryly.

" You right! I love you girl I'll see you tomorrow at work."

" I love you too." I say as I hang up and throw my phone on the other side of the bed.

I think the real reason I don't wanna go is because of Reggie. Him and his gang is always there and I just know he's gonna be looking for me. I then hear a knock on my door that startles me.

" Who is it?" I ask.
" Um it's me Michael..... I mean Danny."
I roll out of bed and walk towards my door. I don't know why my heart is fluttering so much just to open the door. I guess it's to see his face again. I slowly open up and I see Danny looking down at his feet until he hears the door creak open. I only open it to leave a little crack cause I don't want him to see how much of a hot mess I look like right now. Then he lifts his head up to look at me through the crack of my door. I can then he took a shower cause I smell the fresh Irish spring body wash on him and his hair is still pretty damp. He smiles blushing a little bit and I return the same gesture. But of course my emotions wanna be bitches and shut off causing me to wipe the smile off my face.
" Hey there... You ok?" Danny asks.