Finding my Happiness

Fighting Demons

The overall trip to Walmart was actually pretty decent. I haven't been out of the house in forever and it felt good to actually be around humans. Michael on the other hand was like a kid in a candy shop. I could tell under the brim of the hat, his eyes lit up at ever object and sight. This man has never been shopping like this before with nobody bothering him or wanting to jump all over him. So I understood why he was so excited about everything. I could tell he was over the whole dying 11 years ago situation. I let him push the basket and that was a mistake. I swear he was pushing it so fast the wheels were burning rubber. On top of that I caught him skipping and lightly singing a soft happy tune. So much for him acting natural.
We grabbed a shit ton of shirts, pants, underwear, hygiene items, basically the whole damn store. For some reason I felt my wallet quiver at the thought of all the items I have to purchase. But I should have known better with 9 men in my house. I think the most amusing item the Michael's needed was makeup. Michael told me that starting from James on up that their Vitiligo is showing and they started using makeup to cover up the spots. He seemed very hesitant on telling me this information but I just let him know that practically every one in the world knows this Information. Plus I'm not really bothered by it. Then we went on to grocery shop and buy food that will hopefully last till I can get paid again. Thank god I brought Michael cause each one of the Michael's have a very particular diet at each age. Some of them were vegetarians, and the others just ate whatever. I would have not known that if I did this by myself. It took about 2 hours to fully finish our shopping and we had two baskets filled with stuff. I swear if these niggas aren't real by now someone better pay me my money back cause a girl is broke after this shit.
We push the two baskets to get in line, and let me tell you it was like pushing a rock up a hill. We stop behind another person in line and Michael picks up a pack of M&Ms and shows it to me.
" Can I have one? " He asks me with the most sweetest smile. You know the black ratchet side of me would say no but I have a soft spot for Michael.
I sigh and I sarcastically roll my eyes.
" I suppose you can."  I say to him as he pulls me for a hug and a kiss on my forehead.
" Thanks Jazzy!" He says letting me go and putting the pack of M&Ms in the basket. He does have a childlike quality about him but a fatherly essence when he hugged and kissed my forehead. It honestly made me lose my train of thought. I come back to reality with Michael snapping me out of my thoughts.
" So do you think this is enough for all of us?" He asks.
"I would hope so cause after this I'm going to be broke for awhile." I say picking up a magazine from the rack while we wait in line.
" I wish I could help you with all of this honestly but I don't have access to my money anymore." He says shrugging his shoulders.
" It's ok. I know you would buy all of it if you could." I say flipping through the magazine pages. As I'm in my own world, I hear Michael gasp rummaging through something. I look over to see him pulling out a magazine.
" What's wrong with you? What happened to you acting normal?"
" Look! It's Paris!" He says putting the Rolling Stone cover in my face and sure enough it was his daughter.
" Gosh she grew up so fast!" He says staring at the cover. A smile creeps over his face.
" If you want to buy it you can. I know you miss her."
" Oh could you? It would mean the world to me." He says clutching the magazine in his chest.
"Sure. It's an honor to make you smile." I say to him. We then are next in line and I'm dreading how much it's all gonna cost.

10 minutes later me and Michael truck both baskets to the car. Let's just say my credit card is maxed the fuck out and a little part of me wants to cry. But it's the last little bit of kindness in my heart that lets me hold my tears in. We finally make it to the car and my legs are burning from pushing the heavy cart to the car. I unlock the doors and I hear Michael groan behind me.
" What you huffing and puffing for?" I say turning around.
" Please tell me you have someone put your bags in the car for you?" He says out of breath.
" Nope. I'm a peasant and so are you now Mr. Jackson. Welcome to domestic life." I say popping the trunk of my car and I start to put bags inside.
" I'm too old for this shit." Michael says under his breath as he pushes the basket closer to the car to load the bags.
" Please if you can still dance like you did when you was 20 years old, you can carry bags." I say focusing on the task in hand. Without any more complaints we both empty the carts into my small ass car. Team work is what honestly got us through the mountain of items. After that we plop back into the car and pull out of the parking lot. Hopefully my house isn't burning down.
" I had a good time. Anytime you wanna go shopping I am more than happy to come with you." He says putting his seat belt on.
" Really? I hate shopping."
" Oh yes I loved it! I guess I liked it cause I was actually around people. I felt normal for once. And I appreciate you treating me like a human. I can't tell you when the last time I actually helped with groceries." He says chuckling.
" Well it can be our thing. Just me and you."
I feel Michael looking at me from the corner of my eye.
" I would like that a lot." He answers back while a small smile creeps on my face. It's silent for a few seconds while we're on the road back to the house and my phone starts to ring.
" Can you grab my phone for me? It's on the floor." I ask and he reaches down to pick up my phone.
" Who is it?"
" Um.... Reggie? Would you like for me to answer it?" Michael says. I snatch the phone from his hands and end the call.
" Ugh fucking bastard won't leave me alone!"
" Who's Reggie?" He asks as I throw my phone in the back seat and focus back on the road.
" He's my ex. We broke up about six months ago."
I state as I feel the pain shoot up my spine just thinking about him.
" Why did you guys break up?"
" I don't wanna talk about it if you don't mind." I say bitting the inside of my cheek trying to distract my mind from the horrible memories I had with Reggie. Just thinking about him makes me grip onto my steering wheel hard making my hands red. I can feel Michael looking at me, analyzing my facial expressions.
" Ok... if you ever need to talk about it just let me know." He says patting my hand that is clamped on the steering wheel.
" It's not worth talking about. But thank you." I say as a wave of silence rushes over us. Any conversation about Reggie tends to do this. It just becomes so awkward.
" So I don't know if this is weird to you or not but, I know someone who has a crush on you." Michael says breaking the silence.
" Who?"
" Do you really wanna know?"
" Yes."
"You positive?"
I roll my eyes and sigh. " Yes Michael."
" You really really sure?"
" Stop teasing and tell me!" I playful hit him in the arm as we stop at a stop light.
" Danny."
" Wait what?" I say turning to look at him.
" Yeah Danny likes you." He says with a smug smile on his face.
" How do you even know that? Did he tell you that?" I questioned.
" No he didn't have to tell me anything. I can just tell. He looks at you like your the only girl in the world. Trust me I was him at one point." He says as the light turns green and I begin to drive again.