Finger Painting

Chapter 27: April 14th, 2016

Lotus Blood - Age 18

The clouds were evenly shaped.

I mean, as evenly shaped as clouds could get. But they were mostly separate, and heavily resembled the singular fluffy clouds that a child would draw in the sky of their landscape picture. The sky was also blue as ever and got lighter and lighter as I walked down the deserted street - it was nearly six so many people must have been eating dinner.

The fresh air did me good, which is why I hardly ever drove to the therapy office anymore. I wasn't going outside enough, and being cramped in a basement that reeked of blood was not pleasant for my lungs day in and day out.

My fingers danced over the scars of the cuts I had made a week earlier, a new one was added to the fading lines. It was from a client who had come to my house to pick up a certain painting he had requested - it was a quite large one and after I had fully finished it I'd decided that I wanted to keep it for myself.

So I killed him.

The door handle was cold when I unlocked it and opened it to find a man in a black suit. His brown eyes looked me up and down - I was wearing one of Blaine's hoodies and shorts that weren't visible under the blue NASA hoodie.

"Sir, you're a day early," I mumbled tugging at my odd attire, as he surveyed the foyer. His eyes returned to me and he raised his eyebrow before running a hand through his unruly brown hair.

"Is it done?"

I opened my mouth but he hushed me, "call me Julian. Now, show me the painting," he growled looking around to maybe spot it. It wasn't upstairs because he was a day early and I wasn't anticipating him to just barge in and demand the finished painting.

He was lucky I finished it this morning.

"Uh, it's downstairs, follow me," I knew he was eyeing me up and wished that he had come on the day that I told him to, so I could wear something more... appropriate.

The basement looked the same as usual except the tower of boxes was relocated to another side of the basement. The area behind them now had a door and a lock.

Thank god.

"Where is it, Miss.Blood.?"

"Uh, hold on, I've got to grab something from upstairs," I put on my best apology face, "I'll only be a minute," I drifted up the stairs and searched the kitchen drawers for a knife. All my dirty ones were still in the dishwasher - so I settled for a large butcher knife I never really used.

I stood near the basement door, "Julian, could you come upstairs to confirm which bubble wrap you'd like to wrap it in?!" Yelling for him, I pressed my back against the wall adjacent to the basement door, waiting for Julian to ascend the stairs.

Smooth strokes.

No mess.

"Lotus!" I turned my gaze to the front yard of Blaine's house and saw Ms.McBride waving me over to where she was tending to the tulips budding out of the mulch. "What are you doing outside without a sweater?" She scolded me and I shrugged - I wasn't wearing anything too thin, it was just a cropped, dark, striped shirt that I had found in the back of my closet.

"It's not that cold," I gave her a warm smile and she ushered me inside exclaiming "nonsense!" over and over. When I set foot in the warm house the smell of something sweet wafted into my nose, "baking a cake Ms.McBride?" I turned around and beamed at her before slipping off my vans and leaving them by the door.

"Cookies actually," she seemed to float into the kitchen and moved around it fluidly as she cleaned up. My legs took me to the island and I sat atop one of the chairs.

"Is there a special occasion?"

Her spine stiffened and she slowly pivoted on her heel to face me, "Blaine didn't tell you?"

What the hell?

"N-No he didn't tell me anything," my hands began to shake and I could feel the pit of anxiety forming in the bottom of my stomach. My eyes must've glazed over because I shook my head to Ms.McBride waving her hand in front of my face.

"Lotus?"

"Sorry, uh-"

"The letter is upstairs on his desk you're welcome to read it," she smiled and moved to the sink to wash the dishes, "come down to have cookies afterward." She glanced at the clock, "Blaine will be home soon to share them with you anyways." Nodding, while slightly dazed I stumbled out of the chair and self-consciously wrapped my arms around my stomach to quell the uncertainty.

Just like she said, a white envelope was on Blaine's desk - ripped open, but intact and containing a letter folded three ways. Trembling, I sat on Blaine's bed and unfolded the paper fully until it was smoothed out, as soon as my eyes did a sweep of the top edge of the letter my heart dropped to my stomach.

Harvard University.

Hearing Blaine enter his bedroom, I stared at him before looking back down at the letter, "When were you going to tell me?"

"I'm not going."

Looking up, I stared at Blaine's sad smile, "What? Why not?!" I jumped to my feet and held the letter out, pointing at the swirly writing at the top, "You have to! It's freaking Harvard!" My chest heaved and he loosely grabbed my wrist and sat me down on the bed next to him.

"Baby," Blaine buried his face into the crook of my neck and I sighed, letting my hands weave into his ink-black hair, "it's a nine-hour drive, I can't go too far from you or my mom." I moved back onto the bed and Blaine shifted his head and shoulders in my lap.

"I don't want you to be held back by me," my fingers resumed playing with Blaine's hair and he sighed heavily, "and plus, I want you to go." A coy smirk played on Blaine's lips and he raised his eyebrow at me.

"You want me to go?" Giving me a fake pout, he crossed his arms over his chest, "if I was that bad then you shoulda told me." Rolling my eyes, I squealed when he got up and pushed me down on the bed. "What is it Lotus, am I smelly? Is that it?" he tickled me and I said 'no' multiple times in between laughs.

"Blaine! Lotus! Cookies are ready!"

Sobering up, Blaine kissed me, "I'll go, for you." Shaking my head, I pushed him away.

"I want you to go, for you," tears welled in my eyes as I looked up at him, "I don't want you to go because I told you to, but I-I also don't want you to stay because of me." Blaine lowered himself to lay next to me and he caught my tears before they could fall.

"I want to go... I didn't want to leave you, but you're okay with it so I'll go, okay?"

"You can still visit," I mumbled, feeling sort of dumb for almost crying over this.

"Was already planning on it," he kissed my nose and I dragged him back on top of me to kiss him one last time before we went downstairs to indulge in the cookies.

I love him.