𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗛𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗻𝘀 🤍

• 𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗖𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗻 •

•🌻•

Nikki's POV

I sat with my head over the toilet for a good 20 minutes, throwing up a grand total of 5 times.

This wasn't because of the baby.. this was because I was so fucking scared. Just everything was scaring me... I was a man, I was pregnant, I was a celebrity which meant that this wouldn't remain a secret for long, the band, touring, just everything was now weighing me down and now my suspicions had been confirmed it was too much for me to handle and then there's Tommy on top of all of it.

Shit, I need to tell Tommy he's gonna be a dad... but all I wanted to do right now is curl up and sleep.

Do I tell him now? The longer I wait the more I'll be torturing myself and the more chance I'll have of him hating me because I didn't tell him and if we combine that with the fact he may not even want this child he'd be pissed. More than pissed, he'd be ravenous.

I remain next to the toilet for a further few minutes just to let my nerves and stomach settle slightly before I haul my body off the ground and rinse my mouth out with some of T-Bone's mouthwash before unlocking the bathroom door and walking into our bedroom where I take off my jacket and throw it across the room placing myself on my side of the bed leaning my head in my hands- debating my choices in my head.

Tommy had obviously noticed my absence because after 10 minutes of my sitting there I hear the door open and Tommy's voice softly calling my name "Nikki?" When I don't look up at him I hear him come closer to me "Hey, babe... you alright?"

Tell him, it's for the best Nikki... just tell him...

"Not really" I sighed trying not to cry, lifting my head from my hands I stare directly into Tommy's dark brown orbs which were consumed by anxiety the moment I spoke, it was incredibly rare for me to admit when I wasn't okay so it was a given that when I did the situation was bad.

"What's wrong?"

"I've got something to tell you... and it's not exactly gonna be easy to understand"

"What do you mean, Nik?"

How do I even begin on this topic?

"Erm.. so... so, you know... you know the other week when we-..erm went out with Mick and Vinny?"

Tommy smirked. "Yeah, we got completely shitfaced"

I nodded. "Well.... you know how when we got back here... you... you-.. er-... you topped me?"

The drummers raises an eyebrow. "Yeahhh?" He draws out, not understanding what I'm trying to say, not that's I really expected him too but I just didn't want to explain this anymore... I already felt like a genetic experiment gone wrong.

"It was the first time I've let you"

Tommy hummed. "Yeah, I know... I don't know why, cause it was amazing, you should let me do it more often if-"

"No, that's what got us into this fucking mess!" I growled at the man, feeling anger rise in me all of a sudden. Pregnancy hormones or stress? Who knows at this point.