Sunshine || HinaTsukiYama || DISCONTINUED

23

"Noya?"

Noya could hear the two boys, and felt guilty when he heard their voices waver. Footsteps got louder, more erratic. He knew that his friends were panicking but he couldn't make himself move.

He was unable to respond, to say or do anything that indicated where he was. So he stayed there, curled up in a ball with his knees to his chest, tears streaming down his face.

He wanted so desperately to assure his kouhais that he was safe, but even he wasn't sure. His panic attacks left him effectively mute until the aftereffects also passed, ranging from a few minutes to several hours.

And so when Yams found Noya curled in a ball on the bathroom floor, he called out for Shoyo.

"Sho! I found him, can you get a hold of Asahi?"

Noya whimpered a little, thankful that the taller boy was there and that he was getting Asahi. The third-year is one of the few people who knows how to fully handle these panic attacks.

The other options were Tanaka and Saeko, and Saeko only learned because Noya had one at their house once. He had tried his very best to hold off on letting himself panic until he was alone, not wanting to burden anyone else with them.

But of course he had to have one at Tanaka's house once. His best friend had called Asahi at three in the morning, knowing that he would know what to do- rather, hoping that he did.

Noya barely registered anything until Asahi arrived, showing the first years out of the cramped bathroom. Asahi scooped his boyfriend into his arms, squeezing tightly to ground the libero.

Apparently he had asked the other boys to grab a few things, because in less than a minute they both returned with different things in their hands, panting slightly.

Asahi took the frozen water bottle from Shoyo's hands and touched it to his boyfriend's neck. This made Noya realize where he was, that he would be safe.

Shoyo was holding off on a panic attack of his own, thoughts swirling around in his mind about how this is his fault; he thought Noya wouldn't be having a panic attack if not for him.

Yamaguchi handed Asahi a small tin of raspberry chocolate coffee grounds, watching as the third-year passed it under Noya's nose. Noya calmed more at this, thankfully, letting out a small sigh after each exhale.

Yams could see the ginger boy next to him trembling slightly, so he grasped his hand tightly. He knew how tiring Shoyo's panic attacks were, and he had one in the gym already.

When he didn't get a squeeze back, Yams made quick eye contact with Asahi, who nodded, understanding the situation.

And so Yams picked up Shoyo bridal-style, carrying him to his room while Asahi held Noya in his lap and rocked him back and forth. As Yams and Shoyo made their way down the hall, Yama heard Asahi start humming, and he smiled slightly before being alarmed by a whimper escaping Shoyo's lips and his trembling worsening.

He toed open the door, which was thankfully not latched, and sat down on Shoyo's bed. He pulled the boy into his lap where Sho was forced to face him.

Yams grabbed both of Shoyo's hands and squeezed, looking into Shoyo's eyes and talking to him gently.

"Hey, Sho, look at me please."

He smiled gently when the ginger, eyes full of tears, looked at him. He pushed his own temptations and thoughts aside- there was a more pressing matter, the reasoning for why they were in such proximity at the moment.

"I'm gonna ask you to count with me, okay? Say the numbers I don't say."

He waited for a nod from Shoyo, albeit a little hesitant.

"One."

"T-two."

"Three."

He watched Shoyo closely as they kept counting, still holding his hands. Eventually the boy started to tremble a little less, his breathing evened out, and he stopped stuttering.

It was at 57 that Yamaguchi decided that Shoyo no longer needed to count, and he sighed a little in relief. He dropped the ginger's hands and gently wiped the tears from his cheeks, smiling gently.

He cupped Shoyo's cheek in his hand and looked at him. He saw the typically clear and vibrant brown tones in Shoyo's eyes. They were muddied as a result of crying, but Yamaguchi thought they were as beautiful as ever.

Shoyo blushed a little at the intense but soft stare Yamaguchi was giving him. He didn't process the fact that he was seated in an interesting position, with his legs wrapped around Yama's waist  fully seated in his lap.

What he did process was the freckles that line his cheeks, making dozens of tiny constellations. He swore he saw the stars on the boy's cheeks.

Shoyo looked up to his eyes and blushed slightly, noticing the other's gaze. He stared into Yamaguchi's eyes, noting the tiny flecks of green and gold swimming in the deep brown.

If Yamaguchi's cheeks held the stars, his eyes held the vast cosmos.

It was almost as if Shoyo were looking at the universe, cupped in his hand.

The two stayed like this for a few minutes until a laugh from Asahi echoed throughout the house- apparently Noya was okay now.

Shoyo pulled his hand from Yamaguchi's cheek with the same speed the other did, blushing a fire red.

Yams felt his already warm face light on fire when he realized the position they were in, his left arm wrapped tightly around the ginger's waist, with the other fully seated in his lap.

Shoyo mumbled an apology as he got up from Yamaguchi's lap, face and ears still very red.

The two left the room to go find their senpais, not saying a word to each other. The tension in the air was thick.

Shoyo was unsure why he was feeling the way he was, why he's still embarrassed, but Yamaguchi knew why he was feeling this way.

He knew it all too well, he would feel it every time the ginger complimented him, every time he told Yams that he believed in him. When Shoyo grabbed his hand to drag him to the gym, when he latched on to Tsukishima's hand, dragging him along. It was the very same tension he felt when he yelled at Tsukki about pride, when their faces were mere centimeters apart.

Yams shook these thoughts out of his mind and sighed in relief when he saw the others downstairs, playing Mario Kart. He looked at Shoyo, whose blush was fading in time with his own, only to see his eyes light up.

"Shoyo! Yams! Watch me kick Asahi's ass and you can play with us!"

The two made their way to the couches, Shoyo electing to sit on the floor next to Noya and Yamaguchi taking the spot next to Asahi.

They laughed as Noya ended up in sixth after Asahi sent a rather nasty blue shell in the last lap. Asahi secured second place, and he made sure to tease the shorter boy about it.

The four played Mario Kart almost all night, not caring that it was a Monday and they had school the next morning.

They ordered take-out ramen, listened to music, and tried to kick each other's asses. Each of them beat the other three at least twice before Shoyo fell asleep, resting his head on Yamaguchi's lap, who blushed furiously.

Yams played with the ginger's hair, smiling lightly as he heard the ginger sigh in his sleep.

Noya and Asahi shared a knowing glance, and Asahi turned down the volume on the television.

Next to fall asleep was Asahi, followed shortly thereafter by Yams. Asahi was leaning on Yamaguchi's shoulder, with Noya's head in his lap.

Noya had fallen asleep a few minutes later, after watching a little bit of Hocus Pocus, which had been playing on TV.

The boys all slept, cuddled awkwardly but content and warm. They felt safe.