Please... make it stop... it hurts... | Depressed Deku AU

Chapter Eleven

Ochako POV

Me and Toga exited the sliding doors at the front entrance of the hospital. 

"Jackass..." I mutter as I think of Midoriya, the mere thought of him makes my blood boil. "I feel like I need to punch something!! He pisses me offffff!!" I yell as I bawl my hands into fists and squeeze my eyes shut.

"I mean... he isn't handling this situation badly..." Toga mutters, I could only barely hear her. She almost sounds... sad? Regretful?

"But he shouldn't have blown up at you for something you couldn't control!" I wipe around to face Toga, who was previously walking behind me.

"Did you see his wrists...?" I think for a moment before speaking.

"His... wrists...?" I questioned.

"yeah... I saw in the park, his bandages fell a little bit. He had huge cuts on them"

"Maybe he's just clumsy?" 

"not like those kind of cuts..." She pauses and bits her lip. "Like... one's... he made..?." I gasp at this

"W-WHAT!?!" I yell, a few people turned to look at us. I ignored their gaze and focused on Toga. "W-What do you mean...?"

"I think he maybe... I don't know... cut himself..." I was shocked that the same guy I met at the hospital... cuts himself... 

but upon more careful consideration, I realize that I kinda made sense. When we saw him wake up he freaked out, like he was having a bad dream. But not a normal run-of-the-mill bad dream, like a BAD bad dream. Maybe like about killing himself...? 

And after he calmed down his eyes were dark and lifeless, like he had given up. But not just on himself, maybe on living too.

"Now that I think about it... that does make sense..." I say, I was a little guilty I yelled at him now. "I can't believe someone would do that... I can't imagine what he must be going through..." 

"Yeah... he's so young... and cute too..." Toga said as she let a small grin creep up her face until it became her famous sadistic smile. "CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT I MISSED SEEING HIM BLEAD!?! HE PROBABLY BLED A LOTTTTT! I WANNA SEE THATTT!" she pouted, I sigh and begin walking once again.

"I wish you would care a little more, you sound like a villain..." I say as I walk off, she follows close behind.

"Are Villans really thattt bad?" I stop in my tracks. "I mean, they probably have a reason for-" Toga is cut off when she runs into me. 

"But Villans KILL people" I point out, Toga just strugs.

"Heroes kill people all the time, it's normally covered up by the media though." I was shocked that Toga was saying this stuff. 

'WHAT IF SHE ACTUALLY BECOMES A VILLAIN!?!' I think as I worriedly look up at her, she must see the fear and concern in my eyes and quickly assures me.

"I-I'm not gonna be come a villain don't worry!" I let out a sigh of relief, I feel stupid for thinking Toga would abandon me that easily. We did plan on becoming heroes together. Man I'm an idiot! Toga would never do that to me... 

....right...?

~~~~

sorry, this probably took like forever to come out. It's just been hard to find time to write, and plus I have some writers block. And I probably sound like I'm making up excuses but, I just can't come up with anything.

You know how I said this was a vent fanfic? Well I don't really think like Izuku anymore, I kinda got over my little hump of depression. But sometimes I still feel exactly like Izuku. So Izuku might not be as realistic as in the first few chapters. If he ever was realistic?

Anyway ill try and come out with a new chapter soon!

Bye~!