everywhere in the stars ( gerz )

1. Drowning Lessons

"Can't you all just shut the FUCK up?!" I roared.

Ray had been playing the same song on his guitar for an hour, and Bob and Frank wouldn't stop bickering about anything and everything.

I was usually mellow and collected, but this all just made me flip my fucking lid.

They all stared at me, mouths wide open, I drew a shaky breath and stood from my place on the couch.

I forced a smile. "I need some air."

"Okay.. " Frank narrowed his eyes. "Don't get mugged."

I slammed the bus door behind me, stepping out into the cool night air. I immediately felt the tension start to drain.

Careful not to touch the bus parked next to ours, I made my way to the makeshift road along which dozens of bands were parked, and started walking, lighting up a cigarette.

The band had been on Projekt Revolution for only four days now, but I was going stir crazy. It had been a while since I'd toured sober, and not having my little brother, Mikey, around was really messing with me.

I thought about calling him, but I'd left my phone on the bus. Oh well.

The cigarette was helping, but I really fucking wanted a beer. I wouldn't have one . . . probably. Alcohol was everywhere. On tour, sobriety was a sadistic bitch, but I'd been in an off mood since I'd left Jersey. That's what Frank said, anyway.

I walked in silence for a while, waving vaguely in the direction of the loud greetings from people still up, out, and partying. Once I'd got to the end of the road, there was a large patch of trees. They looked dark and scary, so I went to explore.

The 'patch' turned out to be larger than I thought. I was pleased to find a small clearing, sitting myself down on a clump of dry moss. Sighing contentedly, and leaning back against a tree, I was about to light up another when I heard a thump, the snapping of twigs and an unintelligible cuss word.

I jumped up and peered into the dark where the noise had come from.

"Hello . . . ?" I half-whispered.

There was a gasp and in a blur I'd been knocked to the ground, a chunky boot pinning my shoulder. I blinked up at my attacker, first seeing the leather boots, then the excessive amount of band-aids on knees scraped all to hell, and a plaid skirt? Yes, a skirt.

"I'm not going to hurt you." I grunted, and the boot hesitated a moment before moving away.

A dainty tattooed hand was offered and I took it, somewhat surprised by the strength with which it hauled me off the ground. I brushed myself off and finally got a good look at my pig-tailed attacker, who was brandishing a red brick, still eyeing me cautiously.

The woman was familiar, I'd seen her around. I racked my brain for the name of her band, Mindless Self Indulgence. They were punk, and the music was crazy, stupid and great.

I was pretty sure it wasn't the lead singer, Jimmy . . . he didn't have tits, just a pair of plastic fairy wings. She herself was wearing the earlier mentioned plaid skirt, an Iron Maiden band tee and a grey zip-up hoodie. Her hair was not-so-neatly pulled back into two pig-tails and the eyeliner framing her brown eyes was . . . nicely done. My eyes flickered to her red lipstick.

"What are you doing in the woods, you creep!?" She spoke and my chest tightened a little bit.

I grinned. "What are YOU doing in the woods? And where did you get that brick?!"

She glared at me and dropped the blunt weapon.

"I needed some air. The brick was holding the bus door open, I brought it just in case I came across a creep out here."

I almost laughed, but just solemnly nodded. I somewhat understood that girls carried weapons at night, with all these stupid drunk men, they were smart to carry bricks.

"I try not to be creepy off stage," I joked.

She smiled, finally. "Oh my god, you're Gerard!"

I looked down bashfully, thinking about the way her eyes sparkled.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I don't remember your name."

She stuck her hand out, and he took it. "Lyn-z, from Mindless Self Indulgence." She said with another lip-gloss smile.

"Lyn-z, with a z, I remember now!" I exclaimed. "Your band is totally rad!"

She grinned. "Fuck yeah, they are!"

I noticed I still had her hand and dropped it, I was even more embarrassed than before. "Your eyes— I mean your eyeliner is rad, too."

Lindsey blushed and smiled that great smile again. "I'm sure I could give you some tips, should we get out of the creepy woods?" I nodded.

We made our way back, talking animatedly about the role of rebellion in the punk scene, I only walked into one tree.

I pulled out my cigarette from before, reaching into my pocket for a lighter. Lindsey watched me light it, her breath hitching a little. Offering her one was the least I could do.

I offered her my pack as I took a drag, raising an eyebrow.

"You smoke?" I said through a cloud.

"Yeah. Thanks." She smiled, taking out one of the smokes. I lit it for her.

I stared as she breathed out smoke into the air. For something as gross as cigarette smoke, I liked the way it looked in the air. There was something beautiful about wisps of pure white against the dark sky.

I had hope, it was everywhere in the stars.

. . .