The Ex-Boyfriend Benefits // 5SOS

Chapter 18

I miss calling him this way. I wish I could call him like this no matter who's around. I wish we could still joke around like this. I miss him. I feel like we havent been actually hanging out even though he's around. Its just, I feel like Ashton wont like it when im being so close with Calum. We are getting to know each other and if he asks me date him, i will say yes within a second.

"I missed you" I cant help to tell Cal. He gives me a smile.

"Of course, you do. And I missed you too" He says sincerely even though he's smirking.

"Okay. We missed each other and now, we're together. So, lets eat now and Im kinda craving that alcohol you got now" I laugh, changing the atmosphere because Ive been kind of emotional.

Since alcohol is involved, we eat as much and as fast as we can.

"Eager much?" I laugh.

"Not gonna lie" He answers immediately.

"Im full now. But wait me up. I need to get a jumper in my room. Im cold." I say and start walking upstairs.

It takes me quite a long time to go back because I cant find my favourite jumper to wear. When I'm about to go downstairs, I almost jump in surprise when I see Cal standing in front of my room, holding the bag where alcohols are in my left hand and holding one glass in his right hand.

"It's okay, right?" He asks. We all know it's not okay but I just shrug, motioning him to come inside my room. Well, we're great friends and he has my mom's permission. Plus, we're just going to drink. No big deal. Right?

"Did Ashton ever come here before?" He suddenly asks. I shake my head no. "He would be turned off if he saw your messy room" Cal laughs.

"Were you turned off?" I ask curiously, but smiling.

"Of course, I was, still am. But my room is messier so I have nothing to complain about" He says and we both laugh, as he suddenly takes off his shoes and pulls down his pants, revealing his boxers and start lying in my bed.

"What are you doing?" I ask, looking kind of surprised but not mad.

"Making myself comfortable. We're just going to drink okay? Dont think too much. We're not going to do something unlikely. Unless you want. Im all good, then" He explains seriously and Im glad a pillow is just beside me so I hit him.

"Geez. Im gonna start." I say, pouring alcohol into the glass and start gulping it straight. "Your turn." I tell him, making it full all over again and handing it to him.

"Thanks. Why so thirsty?" He laughs.

We keep talking about the things we missed about each other. Like, if he's seeing a new girl, how his parents and sister are, new interest, politics, koalas and snapchat.

The atmosphere feels like home. Sure, I'm literally home. But it doesnt always feel like it. Im glad this moment does. You know that comfort and freedom to wear or not wearing anything and to poop? This feels like that.

"So, why did you suddenly disappear while Luke and Michael were following you? Your real reason?" I ask suddenly.

"Real reason? I dont wanna hangout with Ashton." He answers immediately, laughing. I immediately regret asking but I cant stop asking more now.

"But we've been hanging out at school. Are you kidding me?"

"I know and it sucks. That's why I try to not be around him as much as I can." He says like its no big deal. As he fills the glass with alcohol again, giving it to me.

"Do you hate him? Why? Thought you're all good with him kind of dating me" I ask then I drink again.

"Thats basically the reason why I hate him. Because i know he wants to date you" He answers calmly.

"What? Why? I thought you liked him? You helped me with him, do you remember?"

"Of course, I do remember."

"What's the problem?" I ask him, extremely confused now.

"I didnt know you would actually want to date him. I thought you just had a little gay crush on him." He explains.

"I didnt know he liked me too. And will you please stop saying gay as if its a negative thing?" I answer.

"Of course, he likes you. He badly wants to get in your pants" He sounds mad. Silence.

"We like each other a lot." is all I can say.

"You're right." He just says.

"What is wrong?" I cant help to ask. I care about him and I wanna consider his reason on why he doesnt like ashton.

"Nothing."

"Why do you hate him?" It is impossible to sleep now without knowing his answer.

"Did he ever say he's jealous of me?" He asks without answering my question. As far as I can remember, "He never said it" I say.

"Do you think he felt it, though?"

"I dont think so. We never talk alot now."

"Exactly. That's it." He snaps.

"What do you mean?" I ask, staring at him while drinks again.

"They're right. Michael and Luke were right. I'm the jealous one here" He looks up at me. I remain quiet.

"Since you started hanging out him always, you never hang out with me anymore. We barely talk. Im jealous" He laughs.

"You're drunk." I respond as I drink, not looking at him.

"So are you" He laughs louder.

"You're right. Lets stop now. Im really sleepy too." I say as I try to smoothen my bed even if he's there as I get all my pillows thats on the floor. We need to stop drinking now. Cal isn't saying anything so I try look at him.

And he's staring at me.

"Judith.." He says.

Before I even say why, he begins cupping my face with his hands and kissing me. I cant get off of him. I'm in suprise.

I dont realise Im responding to his kiss. Until it hits me. I stop.

"You know I still love you, right?" He says before I even say anything.