Reaper: Book 1

Reminiscing With Pierre Pt. 2

Pierre wakes up. She sits up. I close my diary that can with me when I died and put it away. "Hiding something?" She asks. I smile at her. "Maybe I am maybe I'm not" I tell her ."That's what my father always told me. There were some times where we would get along and just talk. One time he even apologized for hitting me". I look over at her. "Wow. Promises are only as good as the one who keeps it." I said as I sit next to her. "Well that's the thing, he stopped for about a week, then he started hitting me again". She said. "My point exactly. Happened to me too. It was always good a week before a holiday. Then back at it after." I said tossing my hat in the air and catching it.

"We had no family so we didn't really celebrate the holidays. On my birthday he would take me out to eat and wouldn't make me do any chores". "I stayed home for mine. Lame typical party. I think the thing we fight about the most was my taste in clothes." I said as I pulled on my shirt. "I had to suppress my gender and sexuality. My father did not like it when I put on foundation". She said frowning. I'm sorry to hear that. It's sick how people treat others. I can't help it if I'd rather wear boyish clothes than a skirt or a dress. I have nothing against people who wear them. These are just more comfy and easier to move in. I will wear one if I absolutely have to but that's it." I tell her. "People weren't as accepting in 1846." She says. "I bet they weren't. Sad really. I mean it's not hurting anyone. What's the problem?" I ask as I walk over to my dresser and pull out a picture. I hand it to her backside towards her. The writing read: June 29th, 2020 happy 16th birthday. She was wearing a dress. "That's the last human picture I have. It was in my pocket when I woke up. " I tell her. She looks at it for a moment then hands it back. "Oh. Well are we're doing that then mine is August 4th, 1846". She says. I nod.

"They took forever finding you a mentor". Pierre said. "Yeah. To be honest. I don't remember how I came to be what I am. It's all blank. I just woke up in a cold room and seeing this person in red. They gave me an address and your name and that's all I remember." "Red. Yeah, he usually does that stuff." She says standing up. "I remember the day I died. It was very messy. Then the blackness came and then nothing. I felt like I slept for years." I told her as I reminisce. "Oh, death days! I love hearing from them". I laugh." Haha, Batzy must have had a heyday fixing me up." I tell her."Probably. He enjoys getting suicide victims because he knows he'll probably see them again". She says. I smile at her. "I remember sitting there in silence. It was dark, cold, and so, so quiet". She says." Besides being cold sounds kind of peaceful in a way." I said as I put my hat down. "This was a different kind of cold. It wasn't the cold you feel outside, its the kind you feel inside." I nod. "Oh. I see. Sort of. I didn't really feel anything. My body went numb from whatever I took." I said to her leaning against the wall.

"You overdosed? I stabbed myself. Drax shot himself. Allen jumped."She said. "Well I don't know what killed me first. All the shit I took it the blood loss. I took a bunch of shit first and then I stabbed my self a few times in the stomach. I felt the pills kick in so to make sure they couldn't bring me back I slit my wrists and laid back waiting for the lights to go out. All while my father was downstairs. On my birthday too." I told her. "When I stabbed myself I did it the way my father taught me. He said only to end it when I had no choice. I knew I had a choice so I wanted to make it slow and painful because that's what I deserved. And if I survived then grate! I can live with the pain. I don't deserve happiness so I was glad when I woke up, but I wasn't expecting all of this." "You do deserve to be happy. We all do. Even though we don't see it. My note was short. Simple." I said flipping to my last diary entry. "I'm not sure how it came with me," I tell her as she reads it.

It reads:

Happy Birthday to me. Today I give my self my gift. I guess I should enjoy my last day. I do wonder what happens when you die. Dad threw me a party. I used it to give my family a silent goodbye. I opened my gifts and had some cake. After it was over I put my presents on my bed and now here I sit writing. This will be the last entry. I went to the bathroom and found an assortment of meds. I dumped them out and took them all. I shall write as I feel them kick in. After that my knife will do the rest.

It's been about twenty minutes. I feel cold, yet I'm sweating. My breathing is shallow now. I guess that's my cue. So I leave whoever reads this my final words:

IM FREE.

She hands it back and I lit it away ."The notes always come with you. Even if you burn it" she says. She reaches in her pocket and pulls out an old sheet of paper. It read:

I'm sorry dad but this world is just not my place. I've tried for so long to fix myself and be normal, but I've come to realize I'll always be a child of sin. It's okay though because I know you'll be happier without me, I was misplaced I'm a disgrace, born at the wrong time and in the wrong place. So I guess this is it world, goodbye

I hand it back to her. "I didn't care to make a long one. No one cared anyway." I said. "Worthless. Useless. Waste of air. Mistake. And his favorite. You are nothing you'll Always nothing. You will die nothing. I threw those words back at him after I reaped him. Batzy seemed to enjoy the show." I shuddered at the words. "why are people like this? what did you do to deserve this? I may hate children but I don't think they should hate themselves". Pierre said giving me a sympathetic look. "That's the thing I do hate myself. And I don't know what I did. I ask that question every day. I hear those words every time I sleep. Awake sometimes. I blame myself for it sometimes. Maybe if I was like other girls maybe my life would be different. Maybe I'd be alive still." I said sighing as I went into the bathroom locking the door.