Nang Dahil Sa Pag Ibig ( Vhong Tee )

Chapter 22

Tanya's POV
Early morning when I woke up and went downstairs, only to see my dad whose now busy reading a newspaper at the salas. My dad greeted me and so I greeted back. I asked him where's my mom and he said she's in our garden. I straightly went to the kitchen to drink water. After drinking, I held the necklace Vhong just gave me the other day. It was a pendant necklace finely crafted with turquoise. 2 days had passed and I noticed that Vhong seems very uneasy everytime he's with me. He's very uncomfortable with me. Parang everytime na magkasama kami, parang may gusto siyang sabihin pero may bumabagabag sa isipan niya. Minsan nakita ko pa siyang tulala at parang ang lalim ng iniisip. Gusto kong magtanong pero hindi ko magawa kasi nga busy din ako sa kompanya. Hindi ko nga rin maintindihan si Dad bakit pachill-chill nalang siya gayong nanganganib ang kompanya. Can someone enlighten me?

Nagising ako sa ulirat nang tumunog nang dalawang beses ang naiwang cellphone ni Dad sa countertop. It's not that I'm being interrogative but out of my curiosity, I opened the one's it notified his phone. I'm having a suspicious misdoubt in my mind and I can't just stand and wait for someone who would feed up my uncertainty.

I covered my mouth using my hand when I read the notification. It was Mr. Aki Chua who sent a two message to him. If I'm not mistaken, he was Vhong's Chinese uncle.

"Gratifyingly, Vhong just accepted my offer to be my endorser in the Philippines!"

"I would also like to share to you that he will automatically fly back in the Philippines next week. Good thing, he agreed on me"

My vision got blurry when a tear started molding in my eyes. Halos mapaluhod ako sa natuklasan ko. Was it the reason why Vhong's very uneasy everytime he's with me? Ito ba ang nagpapabagabag sa kanyang isipan at nagiging dahilan kung bakit minsa'y nakatulala nalang siya sa kawalan? Hindi ko matanggap. I can't believe it. This was the first time he broke my trust and I just couldn't find a way how to get through this. This was my first. I don't even expect to be this hurtful and sore.

"Ma'am, okay lang po ba kayo?" I wiped out my tears immediately when a Filipino helper just talked at my back. I turned around and face her.

"Nothing. Napuwing lang ako. Paki-linisan nalang itong kusina. Medyo marami na sigurong alikabok" I reasoned out.

"Sige po, Ma'am. Sorry po" She apologized and I just nooded to her.

I left my father's phone in the countertop, not leaving any footsteps I made. Siguro magtataka siya kung bakit naka-open na ang message na iyon pero wala na akong pakialam. All I want right now is to clarify things between Vhong and me.

9am when I arrived at the company. Vhong texted me a goodmorning greet but I did not reply. He texted many times after that but I turned off my phone. I don't want it to disturb my meetings. But it seemed very futile even if I turned off my phone, it still made me preoccupied during my meetings. Nagtaka nga si Audrey kung bakit ko raw inapprove lahat ng proposals, eh hindi daw naman kako ako ga'non. I just shrugged at her and went to my office.

Lunch time came, I just ate a pizza and drank a wine. Nakita ko pang kumunot ang noo ni Audrey pero hinayaan ko nalang siya. Hell, mababaliw na ata ako kakaisip sa natuklasan ko kanina. Since when did he lied to me? Kailan lang?!!! Tang---ina. I released a heavy sigh and called my secretary. I'm about to say something when she talked first after he came into my office.

"Iyong jowa mo nagtext. Punta ka raw sa condo niya mamayang alas singko ng hapon" Hindi na ako nagulat sa sinabi niya. Alam kong magyaya talaga 'yon sa'kin.

"Cancel all my meetings this afternoon" I said coldly. Hindi na siya nag alangang sumagot pa sa halip ay tumango nalang. Halatang gusto niya pang magtanong about sa amin ni Vhong but she just refused.

My mind is aching as well as my heart. Hindi ko parin mawari kung bakit kailangang maglihim sa akin ni Vhong. His uncle just said he'll fly in Philippines next week?! Putangina naman. Kailan niya pa balak ilihim sa akin ito? Kapag aalis na siya kinabukasan. Was it easy for him to leave me? Nasanay na akong palagi siyang nasa tabi ko. I don't even imagined myself without him. Pero kung ganitong maglilihim lang pala siya----- hayss....

We've promised back then, that we'll not keep a secret to each other. But he just broke it. Ngayon pa niya binalak na iwan ako na may problema din akong nireresulba. Can we just fight together? Did he just chose to fight with himself? Where did I go wrong? Hindi naman ako naglihim sa kanya ng mga bagay-bagay.

—

Exactly 5pm in the afternoon when I came to his condo unit. Agad kong pinihit ang door knob at pumasok sa loob. Nasanay na din naman siyang ako ang nagbubukas ng pinto sa tuwing pumupunta ako dito kaya ga'non.

Agad nagliwanag ang mukha niya nang makita ako. He hugged me but I didn't respond.

"Kailan pa?" I said coldly.

"Ang alin, baby?" He said sweetly.

"Alam kong alam mo ang tinutukoy ko! Since when did you started in lying to me?! Vhong aalis ka next week!" I blurted out. He was totally shocked.

"Tanya, sasabihin ko nama----"

"Hanggang kailan ha? Kapag aalis kana kinabukasan, doon mo pa balak sasabihin sa akin?!" I shouted at him.

"Hindi naman kasi madaling sabihin sa'yo 'yon dahil alam kong masasaktan ka" He explained. I chuckled.

"At sa tingin mo maiibsan ang sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon kapag pinatagal mo pa?! Mas lalo lang akong nasaktan, Vhong!" Tumahimik siya sa sinabi ko. Kaya dinagdagan ko ang sasabihin ko.

"Vhong naman. We already had promised to each other. No secrets allowed but you still did it with guts. You broke my trust! You fucking broke me" At sa isang iglap ay tumulo ang mga luhang kanina ko pa pinipigilan lumabas.

"Tanya, please understand and respect me" He uttered.

"Vhong, you will fly back in Manila next week. You keep it to yourself and you would expect me to celebrate? Did you hear your words? Was that easy for you to leave me? Did you shift another company to endorse for because our company is now falling down?" Halos mapaluhod ako sa sakit na nararamdaman ko ngayon. It hurts having the person whom you trusted with your everything ruin you for nothing.

"Hindi sa ga'non 'yon"

"Sa ga'non 'yon, Vhong! Pinagkatiwalaan kita pero sinira mo ang tiwalang binigay ko sayo. You just broke your promi--"

"Promises are meant to be broken"

Agad dumapo ang kamay ko sa kanya matapos niyang sabihin iyon. Nagulat siya sa ginawa ko.

"It will not be broke, if you didn't broke it" Sambit ko sa kanya.

"Ginawa ko iyon para sa'yo, Tanya. Sana naman maintindihan mo 'yon!" He squirted out.

"By now, I don't really understand you. You teach me how to smile and I don't expect that you'll also teach me how to cry" My heart trembled so bad. Pain is now shredding every pieces of my heart.

"It's not my intention to hurt you. It's not my intention to broke my promise as well as your heart. Sorry" He apologized.

"Ga'non naman talaga 'diba? 'Yong promise nagiging sorry nalang sa huli" Mapait kong wika. Ngayon ko lang napagtantong ang pag-ibig ay parang ulan, hindi porket nakapayong ka ay hindi kana mababasa. Katulad sa pag-ibig, hindi porket mahal ka ay hindi kana sasaktan.

"It's for our future. Kinabukasan natin iyon!" Tugon pa niya. He's voice thundered.

"Kinabukasan mo 'yon" Pagtatama ko sa kanya.

"Kinabukasan ang nagtulak sayong pumunta dito at hindi ko akalaing kinabukasan din ang magiging dahilan para lisanin ang lugar na ito at iwan mo'ko" I added and stormed out of the room. Tears are now shrieking down my cheeks.

Ang sakit-sakit ng nararamdaman ko ngayon. Hindi ko akalaing ang lalaking minahal ko ay magbibigay ng ganitong sakit sa akin. Ito 'yong sakit na kailan ma'y hindi ko naranasan noon. Tama nga ata sila. Pain is part of loving. But I can't resist it anymore. I felt bad for myself. Naaawa na ako sa sarili ko. Ni hindi ko na alam kong anong kahulugan ng salitang saya. Nakalimutan ko na ito matapos ang anibersaryo naming dalawa. Huminga ako ng malalim bago nagsalita.

"I thought we're already fixed for each other. Pero munting akala ko lang pala iyon. Sorry to say this but..... I'm now breaking up with you" Napaupo siya sa sofa matapos marinig ang mga salitang iyon sa akin.

"Baby, please, let's fix this. Hindi ko kayang iwan kang ganito tayong dalawa" He stand again and begged.

"Vhong, gusto kong hanapin ang sarili ko kasi sa kakasunod ko sayo hindi ko akalaing mawawala ako" I cried.

"Then let's find yourself together" He said. His jaw moves aggressively from trying hard to contain his overflowing emotions inside.

"Precisely, I'm lost and you are, too. Matatagalan tayong hanapin ang mga sarili natin. We can't fight together because it will just make things hard" I bite my lips from great agony. Halos madurog ang puso ko ng makita ko siyang umiyak at hinilamos ang dalawang kamay sa kanyang mukha.

"Hindi pa sapat ang pagmamahal natin sa isa't isa para maresulba ang ating problema" I'm about to walk out but he hugged me from behind, sobbing.

"Please, baby. I want to fix this with you. I'm begging you, please don't leave me. My existence in this world is nothing without you. Handa akong umurong sa deal" He was merely begging me. Ngunit buo na anh desisyon ko. Gusto kong ayusin muna ang sarili ko bago ang iba. Malulugmok man siya pero alam kong may mga taong nandiyan para tulungang makaahon siya. For now, I can't help him to be save because even me, I'm sinking in my own misery.

Inalis ko ang braso niya sa katawan ko at humarap sa kanya.

"Take care always. I love you but my love for you isn't just enough to resist this. You will always be embeded in my heart" Tatalikod na sana ako ngunit hinawakan niya ang braso ko at hinalikan ako. It was a smooth one. Walang gumagalaw.

Kasabay ng paghalik niya ay ang pagtulo ng luha naming dalawa. Para itong gripo na umaagos sa sakit, hinagpis at pighati. Kahit talaga gaano mo kamahal ang isang tao, darating talaga sa punto na kailangan mo siyang bitawan dahil kung hindi mas lalo ka lang masasaktan.

"You will always be the best thing that got ever happened in my life. Baby, I love you" Sumilay sa kanyang mukha ang mapait na ngiti. Matapos niyang sabihin iyon ay tumalikod na ako at umalis sa condo niya. Umiiyak ako habang naglalakad. Mismong mga tao ay nagtataka na rin. Ipinagsawalang bahala ko nalang iyon dahil sobrang nasasaktan talaga ako ngayon.

Nang makarating ako sa parking lot ay napaupo ako sa gutter at umiyak sa mga tuhod ko. I think this was probably our last. Ang sakit lang isiping matapos naming sumaya sa mga nagdaang taon ay hahantong ang aming relasyon sa ganitong sitwasyon. Sitwasyong pinlano ng tadhana. Mismong ako ay hindi ko inasahang magiging ganito kahapdi ang pagmamahal ko sa kanya. Ngayon ko napagtantong sa pag-ibig, hindi puro bigay ka nalang ng bigay. Kailangan mo ring humingi ng kapalit. Dahil baka sa kakabigay mo ay maubos ka na ng tuluyan.

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Pinagtagpo pero 'di tinadhana~
Charrr HAHAHAHA.