Trust Me. I'm Lying - (SLOWLY EDITING)

Fix Broken Things: Chapter 19

"Being happy is a very personal thing— and it really has nothing to do with anyone else ."

—Abraham-Hicks, Getting Into the Vortex

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CHAPTER NINETEEN:

Fix Broken Things.

I was officially allowed to get out of the house for the following Monday. Out of my room on Sunday evening. Chris hadn't appeared on Sunday morning, as she had told Jess who had told Carson, and then Carson had told Mom. It was weird—she never told me she wasn't coming in any way. And because she usually appeared at my house even before I did. I hadn't heard from her since Friday.

I tried to cover as much skin as I could as I got ready to go to hell on that morning. I put on a shirt with an England flag on it, jeans, Converse, and a long blue jacket over it, which fastened at the waist and reached my hips. Then I did something I had never done before to go to school, and from the back of my bedside cabinet, I produced my makeup bag.

Legitimately, I had had this thing since I was fifteen. I only used it for Christmas and the occasional wedding party. It wasn't that I hated makeup. I just thought that wearing a lot of it made you lie about your appearance. I had everything I needed in that bag to cover the two red-now-fading-into-brown spots on my face. I stared at myself in the mirror for a while after my face looked normal.

I've been wearing my hair down a lot lately, at least when I was here alone and quarantined. It reached my chest now rather than my shoulders. I've always disliked wearing it down because I think it will frizz or someone would cut it. Isabelle from a few months ago would have never even considered doing what I was thinking. I went to my closet and came back to the bathroom with a beanie in my hand. Four months ago, I would have been terrified of this thing.

But right now, my hair was behind my ears, and its waves were looking a little defined. There's a red glow on my cheeks and a dancing light in my eyes—I liked how I looked. I felt good about myself, even if it was just for today. I pushed the hair out of my face and put on the beanie, smiling at my reflection.

***

"You're back!" Jess threw her arms around me when I finished closing my locker door and making me drop the books I was holding. She pulled back and helped me pick them from the floor. "Good. I won't have to pretend to puke alone when Chris and Aiden start being gooey and shit around me."

"Wow, that's super encouraging, thank you," I muttered, putting the things in my bag. "What's up?"

"The sky," she replied. I scowled at her, and she laughed. "Not much. Couples being gooey, teachers being boring. Etcetera, etcetera. How are you feeling—wait. Are you wearing makeup, Bells Ryan?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah. I was trying to hide a couple of horrible things that protruded from my skin."

Jess grabbed my face and put it inches away from mine. In a very Christina-ish way, if I may add. I pulled away. Jess was smiling knowingly in a very un-Jessica way. "You're wearing eyeliner!"

"Well," I began to raise my voice a little, feeling annoyed. "When I woke up, my hair was not disgusting. I like what I'm wearing for once, and considering I looked like shit for the past week—"

"Relax," Jess said, placing her hands on my shoulders. "You look amazing."

"Thanks," I mumbled. I changed the subject as I started walking towards our first class. "Do you happen to know why Christina has been avoiding me?"