Spy School: Zoe or Erica?

The Plane Ride

The following is a group chat text string acquired by the CIA. Messages include Agents Benjamin Ripley, Mike Brezinski, Jayden, Jawaharlal O'Shea, Chip Schacter, and Emma.

[WARNING: THE FOLLOWING IS A TOP-SECRET FILE. DO NOT SHARE OR DISTRIBUTE THROUGHOUT THE SOCIETY IN ANY WAY.]

Guys, Emma is the person that broke through the ceiling with Jayden the other day, I just didn't reveal her name. She was the one that made Ben's breath hitch, and she was also the one with blonde hair.

Ben: What is the point of this? We're literally ten feet away from each other on a plane. Communication can come in easier ways than texting at this point.

Jayden: Welcome to the twenty-first century, dingus. Technology rules!

Mike: I don't think you'll be saying that anymore when robots take over the earth.

Emma: They won't- at least for the next few centuries.

Chip: Yeah, because of the CIA. We'll stop them before they can do anything fatal.

Jawa: Say that to a fifty-foot robot with a thermonuclear arsenal strapped to their waist. You compared to them is like a louse compared to an elephant.

Chip: You compared to Erica is like a louse to an elephant, knucklehead.

Jayden: You all compared to Erica together is an atom to the universe. I have to admit- I'm not even as good as Erica, even with my handsome looks 😏

Emma: Keep telling yourself that. Keeeeeeeep telling yourself that, Jayden.

Ben: Since when did the subject go from human annihilation by robots to comparing Erica to us? See, this is what I mean by this chat being useless and a waste of time.

Jayden: You're useless and a waste of time.

*Benjamin Ripley has left the chat*

Mike: Well, thanks a lot, Jayden.

Chip: Hold on a second-

Jawa: Why? 

Chip: I'm going to use brute force and make Ben join the chat again. I could feel our average IQ level skydiving the second he left.

Jayden: Yeah, it skydived because you're the anchor dragging us down.

Jawa: Good one!

Jayden: 💪

*Benjamin Ripley has joined the chat*

Chip: There we go! What did I miss?

Ben: Chip, you never specified how long I had to stay on this chat.

*Benjamin Ripley has left the chat*

Chip: That little-

Emma: Okay, I'm going to head out. I've got a few episodes of The Office to catch up on.

*Emma has left the chat*

Mike: Well, I guess it's just us now.

Jawa: Chip keeps coughing on me. Can somebody get over here and strong-arm him out of the way?

Mike: Is he sick? If he is, it's not really his fault.

Jawa: I don't know if he's sick or not, but all I know is he's directing all of his coughs in my direction.

Jayden: If he's sick, them I'm off this plane 🤮

Chip: I am sick. I've had a cold since yesterday night. It's been such a pain.

Jayden: Hahahahaha suck it

Jawa: If Chip's sick, then I'm probably sick too by now. He's been coughing on my since the start of the plane ride.

Chip: Is anyone else sick around here? I hope I infected someone.

Jawa: Yeah, is anyone not well here?

Jayden: Look in a mirror, dingus.

*Jawa has left the chat*

*Jayden has left the chat*

*Chip has left the chat*

Mike: Alll by myseeeellllf