I slept at YiFan's place and we talked a lot, he helped me find a way of how to talk to Lay after so i went back home after at night
As i parked my car on the driveway i saw lights up in the house. It means Lay's at home. I didn't cry at this time. I cried a lot because of him, i want a fresh start. I just don't know how.
As I went in he greeted me:
"Vivien. I missed you. Look i cooked for you. It's your favourite."
"I'm not hungry." I scold him. When i saw his face everything came up. I was thinkging about do i really want a fresh start with him? ...
Lay was following me upstairs.
"Viv. I'm so sorry."
"Are you?"
"Yes I am.. sorry for all i've done. I was drunk and-c"
"I don't care about your excuses."
"I'm sorry. I'm begging you to give me a new chance."
"I need some time." I started packing my clothes and Lay came closer.
"Don't go." He was about to cry. His voice cracked. "I do love you. And i know i did many stupid things but please... don't leave me."
"I told you i need some time."
Lay's point of view
I held her hands while tears dropped from my eyes. I really loved her. She was my bigges fan i know and i'm hers and i need her more than ever. I know I made a huge mistake at that night i didn't even think about it I just don't want to lose her.
She told me she needs time. I know if i'll give her time i'll lose her. I knew if I let her go now I might never get her back in my life. I had to do something.
And as she turned to me i kissed her. I didn't want to let her go.
"Vivien i'm so sorry. I love you and i need you."
"I love you too." Finally what she said to me was a relief for me. I got her back.
I kissed her so passionately and with full of my love. I lift her up and i lay her back down on our bed.
Your point of view
I had a feeling of disgust. Having love with my love where he cheated on me. But i do. I really loved him from head to toe.
He was my first love and he was my first real boyfriend. I can't let him go.
I needed him to love me. I felt his body on mine. I could touch him and i could kiss him this was everything i wanted.
The next days he was cooking for me breakfast, lunch and dinner too. He bought me flowers when he went out. He came home early and he helped me cleaning the house.
Yet i felt alone sometimes. I couldn't clear my mind what if he meet a girl instead of working. I talked to Yifan almost everyday to make him sure I'm fine.
Still it took me two weeks to feel comfortable with him again. But it doesn't mean that I ain't worrying.
I thought we will have great movie nights and we can make out but we did only once when i first came home. Soon i felt uncomfortable in my own body.
I eat a lot and i used the weight scale more. It showed me that I'm heavier but it didn't show..
I almost went crazy when i figured it out that my period is being late for more than a week.
I think I knew I'm pregnant. I felt somehow strange.
Since me and Lay having good time i was thinking about to tell him or wait one more week to make sure myself.
I was waiting a few days and I went to buy three tests. All of them showed i am pregnant. Then I went to a doctor after the 4th week and he made me sure that yes I am having a baby.
I went home and I was so eager to tell him that we ate expecting a baby but when Lay finally arrived home i was nervous.
"Hii Vivi." He greeted happily.
"Hi Honey." I went and hugged him.
"Honey? Since when we call each other by nicknames?" He was surprised a bit.
"Hmm since .." -there is no perfect timing right?!...-"since i'm pregnant." I told him as fast as i could.
"What? Are you pregnant?"
"Yes? Are you happy? We will have a real baby and we will have a real family. A little baby we can raise together." I was so happy I forget everything just imagined our future.
"Are you kidding?" But he brought me back to reality.
"No. Why?"
"You are my family i don't want a baby. I got a shock only if i just think about how this is running up and down crying and everything... No. I'm not happy. Not at all." He even pushed me a little bit.
What he said was the real Lay coming out....He doesn't want a baby and probably means that he doesn't want a family with me.. I was so disappointed and i went up to my room.
"Vivien uhh.. I'm sorry.." he came after me he just realized how hard was that for me to take.
"No you shouldn't say sorry." I slam the door behind me and quickly closed it with the keynAnd i sit in front of it.
"Viv please. Let me in." He knocked a thousand times...
"Vivi we don't need a baby. I love you and i can't share my love." He said it through the door and I was laughing of how ridiculous is this.
I stood up and opened the door and shouted as harsh as I could:
" Are you serious? You shouted with me that you don't want "this" and this is still me. If you can't love the baby then you don't love me." I pointed to my stomach.
"I'm sorry."
"Sorry for what? We were filled up this room with our love and this baby is our love. You can't say you're sorry. It's not fair." I was crying.
I pushed him aside and went to the bathroom. He tried to hold me back but i shaked my hand off from his grasp.
I was having a cold shower when everything went black.
Lay's point of view
I heard she was dropped everything and then she was having a shower. A few minutes later i heard something big was dropped.
"Vivi are you ok?" I was still worried about her but not about the baby. I really don't want it. She is still young and i am too. I think i care more about my career than building up a family.
She doesn't respond.
"Viv i know you are angry but please say something." I knew she would already insult me but she was scilent.
I was now really worried and i kicked the door in.
She was on the floor. She probably fell down or slipped. I immedately called the hospital to come here.
The doctors came in ten mins and they took her. I give them some clothes to dress her up. I was afraid to move her body. I didn't want to hurt her. After they were drove off with my wife i climbed into my car and drove after them to the hospital.
