fake (b.t.c.)

twenty one

"why didn't you tell me?"
•••
"wait, what's going on here?" ben shook his head.
"jules and i-"
"for the last time, kevin, julia."
he shot me a look. "julia and i dated. for a really long time." he started, and i flopped down in the chair in front of taylor's station, preparing myself for the worst.
"you guys dated?" ben's eyes widened. "jules, why didn't you tell me?"
"it-it...i didn't think it was important." i said quietly. kevin scoffed. "yeah, 'cause a year and a half is so insignificant."
ben swallowed nervously. "so, what else is happening?"
before kevin could open his mouth, i jumped in. "he's trying to make it sound like a big deal, but it's really not, so please don't-"
"i'm still in love with you." kevin said. "i've said it once, i'll say it again."
"kevin, stop." i pleaded. "i can't deal with this, i can't deal with you."
ben was just staring wide eyed at the two of us, not speaking a word.
"why won't you just listen to me?" kevin asked. "all i want is just one more chance, and-"
"you had your chance!" i exploded as i stood up. "you had your chance to tell me you loved me, and you blew it to mess around with the girl next door!"
"what the fuck?" ben said incredulously. "you seriously cheated on her?"
kevin rolled his eyes as he turned to him. "oh, shut up, ben. i've changed. six months of not seeing you made me realize that i really fucked up, but-"
"maybe you should have thought about that before." i snapped.
"-but as soon as i see you again, you're just flirting with him-" he pointed to ben, "- every chance you get, and he's inviting you to weddings and buying you cookies, and it's like you're just trying to rub it in my face."
kevin had gone from desperation to pure anger as he spat the words out, looking between ben and i.
i licked my lips, thinking carefully about my next words.
i wish kevin would have just kept his mouth shut.
"i wish you would figure out that not everything is about you." i said slowly. "i'm just trying to move on, kevin. i'm trying to be happy."
"if acting like a little whore is your way of doing that, i guess i can't do anything to stop you."
the look in his eyes that i'd seen after our kiss had completely vanished.
my jaw dropped and my head started to hurt as tears welled up in my eyes. i couldn't find anything to say, so i just grabbed my backpack and rushed out of the room. i heard ben's voice faintly say, "you fucking asshole," and footsteps coming down the stairs after me.
"jules, wait up." ben jogged behind me asi pushed the door to the chilly streets open. the tears were already streaming down my face by the time he caught up with me, and turned me around by my shoulders.
"hey, hey." he said softly, and wiped the tears from under my eyes. "why didn't you tell me?"
"i just wanted to leave it in the past." i sniffled and wiped at my nose. "start fresh, i guess"
ben nodded. "do you want to-"
yes.
"i really have to get home." i cut him off and backed away from his hands that still held my face.
"oh."
"good night." i managed a small smile.
ben's hands dropped to his sides, and when i glanced back halfway down the block, he was still standing there.