Derek POV
It's hard being a wolf.
So many smells, emotions it can be overwhelming.
It's been a particularly bad day for me. I hate that I seem to have these days often
Stiles and I have been dating for 6 months now. He moved in with me and it has been really great.
Although sometimes the only reason I see him is because we sleep in the same bed. He is always studying, working out or sleeping.
I do not blame him though because he works really hard. I know he's exhausted and I am trying hard to just get through this day without bothering him.
I've been lying in bed listening to music and writing most of the day. Music helps me forget what's going on in my brain. Depression is being happy and sad at the same time. I've finished writing this masterpiece as Stiles walks in.
And These Eyes Can Never See the Picture You've Painted of Me...
Pushing for perfection
Pulling for what you think beauty might be
Looking in the mirror
The refection surely is not your own
Nothing works
Everything feels broken
This smile to fake to be real
And these eyes can never see
The picture you've painted of me
I stand there staring....
All I see are my scars, and imperfections
I am trying to change
I am trying to see what you see in me
Most times I want to hide in the shadows
Darkness it surrounds me
And hides my face
If I am so beautiful, why can't I bare to look at myself
but that's not fair is it...because I criticize myself more than anyone. Don't I?
He's leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed. I can see the tense muscles in his arms. He is getting strong from all the wolf workouts. He's giving me that "why are you still in bed" look.
"Der, are you alright?" He asks.
I can't help but smile even if I wasn't really feeling that great.
"What are you staring at?" Stiles asks looking behind him.
"Hmm...let's see...an amazingly sexy man." I answer.
Stiles points at himself and laughs.
"Derek you need your eyes checked" He says smiling.
"See the problem is I am a werewolf I am sure that I have more than perfect eye sight." I say smiling.
We both laugh.
He grabs my laptop from me and begins to read. It doesn't bother me; Stiles stalks me on the internet so it's not like he wouldn't have seen it.
"This makes me both happy and sad." Stiles says
I rub the back of my neck and say, "Yeah, I know. It's been a bad head day."
He sets the laptop down and pulls me in for a hug.
"Babe, I got you." He whispers in my ear.
I know this to be true. Stiles loves me. Some days are good and some days are bad.
Being in a relationship with him is amazing, but somethings are still broken inside me. I never know if I'll be ok and that is ok. I am working through things one day at a time.
Stiles is helping me see myself through his eyes.
I needed to get myself together it was pack game night tonight and I didn't want them to worry.
Just because we are werewolves doesn't mean we have to always be patrolling and doing wolf things.
Last week we played twister, which was hilarious.
Jackson ended up with is head in Scott's armpit and was butt to butt with Boyd. I am sure you can guess that this was all Stiles idea, because of course it was. He's teaching me that the pack isn't just there, that they are family and I need to keep them close and care for them. He is making me a stronger alpha, pack and family.
A/N: I know this chapter is basically filler but I'm having some writers block and I just felt like writing this cuteness. Hope you enjoy.
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How You See Me...
FanfictionDerek hasn't had the best track record when it comes to relationships. He is broken and he has yet to realize his worth. Sometimes we need to see ourselves from the eyes of the people we love to know we matter. It's about finding the strength to be...
